alt.hn

4/2/2025 at 6:14:44 PM

Why I don't discuss politics with friends

 https://shwin.co/blog/why-i-dont-discuss-politics-with-friends

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 4:59:16 PM

For all of the author's bloviating and self-congratulating navel gazing, the article manages to largely overlook values, the only mention of them being to dismissively reduce them to irrational tribalism.

In truth, values and ethics are fundamental to effectively discussing politics. After all, all political decisions are ultimately about how we want to shape the world that we as humans live in. There can be no agreement about economic policy without a shared understanding of the ultimate goal of an economy. No agreement about foreign relations without a shared understanding of the role of nations as representatives for groups of humans, and how we believe one group of humans should interact with another group of humans through the lens of nations.

For the last 20 years at least, the leadership of the two main political parties in the US have largely invested in messaging around the values that they represent. The policies are different too, but over time we've gone from a world where there were at least some cases where the two parties had different policies for how to reach the same goals, and into a world where the parties policies are aiming to realize fundamentally different visions of the world, based on fundamentally different values.

In this world, asking "who did you vote for" isn't a matter of tribalism, but it is a (good) proxy for asking someone "what are your values". If you discover that someone has completely different values from you, then discussing policy isn't going to be useful anyway, because there's no way you'll agree on a single policy when you have different fundamental values.

by rebeccaskinner

4/3/2025 at 5:40:02 PM

I consider this type of thinking to be a form of tribalism because you're essentially saying there are two tribes. Each tribe has specific values.

A person's values are not a dichotomy (i.e. republican or democrat). You simply cannot put people into two buckets that define their overarching moral compass.

A person can be transphobic but support abortion so they have always voted Democrat...or hate everything about Republican values except they got burned by Obamacare so they vote Republican. There is virtually an infinite level of nuance that can be a deciding factor in why someone votes for someone.

by ryanackley

4/3/2025 at 6:43:26 PM

> person can be transphobic but support abortion so they have always voted Democrat

The term you're looking for is political coherence, i.e. the degree to which you can predict a person's views based on knowing their view on one issue. Political elites tend to be highly coherent. If you know a Congressperson's views on guns, you probably know them on abortion and corporate taxes.

In the real world, however, votes tend not to be politically coherent. Instead, what we see in a hyperpartisan polity, is that a diverse set of views collapses after an issue achieves partisan identity status. Talking about a thing through a partisan lens is what causes the partisan collapse. Hence the effects of mass and then social media on the quality of our discussions.

(And I agree with OP that the author's "I'm above politics" stance is naively immature.)

by JumpCrisscross

4/3/2025 at 7:22:34 PM

> Political elites tend to be highly coherent

Coherence might not the word you're looking for. The policies of political parties and groups are born out of historical circumstances and the diverse coalitions they represent. Political elites are "coherent" in the sense that you can expect them to consistently follow the party line, and thus infer all of their views just by knowing one of their views.

The party line, i.e. platform of the Democratic and Republican parties, or any other large political party in the world, is, by itself, nothing coherent though. Many of their policies and claims do not make any more sense besides each other than they would make against each other. Realignments on issues are pretty common across the world. What is left-wing in one part of the world at one point of time might be rightist across space and time.

by archon1410

4/3/2025 at 7:58:02 PM

This is a difference in the subject of coherence.

Logical coherence refers to the variation and predictive power of the reasoning.

Coherence can also be used to describe the variability and predictability of positions or states themselves.

If you measure the characteristics of some photons in a coherent laser, you know what the other photons are doing. They are predictable using a model.

Logic is a poor predictive model for politics. Tribe identification is a strong predictive model for politics

by s1artibartfast

4/3/2025 at 6:30:56 PM

> transphobic but support abortion so they have always voted Democrat

This is the NYT if you want a high-profile example of this existing in the real world.

I worked with a guy who was a goldmine of odd but sincerely held political opinions that subverted the usual narratives. He was (I guess still is) gay but believed that trans people shouldn't serve in the military because he saw that they didn't get the treatment they needed. He wanted everyone to have guns as a protection against crooked cops-- he was from a small town. He was against single-payer healthcare because he thought the government would use it as a political weapon. He was was in theory anti-union because he thought union benefits should just be turned into labor protections for everyone instead of just being for union jobs and supported them only as a stopgap. He was pro-solar/wind and had an electric car not for any environmental reason but because he didn't want to be reliant on the greedy power company.

by Spivak

4/3/2025 at 7:40:11 PM

To me that just sounds like someone who arrives at his political views by thinking rather than blindly adopting whatever his peers believe. It's only odd because it's (sadly) rare these days.

by roarcher

4/3/2025 at 6:59:09 PM

i mean, his views don't sound too odd. he sounds like a communist who's got a dim view of reform or socialism as a means to communism.

by GuinansEyebrows

4/3/2025 at 6:36:34 PM

Tribalism is just bad sociology, that's where the nuance is missing.

by calf

4/3/2025 at 7:51:48 PM

> the parties policies are aiming to realize fundamentally different visions of the world, based on fundamentally different values

This is an incorrect and cynical statement. I understand why you feel this way (for one thing, it's the exact type of language coming out of many of each party's idealists) but it's simply false.

One party supports gun rights while the other supports gun control. Those aren't values. Democrats want to pursue safety from guns. Republicans want to pursue safety from tyranny. Both sides care about personal safety.

Abortion rights is about personal liberty. Gun rights are also about personal liberty. Both sides care about personal liberty.

The competing talking points aren't always conveniently about the same issue though. For Democrats their border policies are about compassion and human rights. For Republicans their border policies are about domestic prosperity.

Do Republicans care about human rights? Yes. Do Democrats care about domestic prosperity? Yes. To pretend otherwise is to willfully push apart the tribes in your own mind, and to trivialize the perspective of the opposition.

The real problem is the one you are contributing to: the unwillingness to empathize. Empathy is the only way to come to a compromise. With a little empathy you might even find that you have to compromise less because you might actually convince someone of your argument, for once.

by MetaWhirledPeas

4/3/2025 at 8:19:34 PM

Imho opinion, what you are describing are republicans of the past. As parent says, there used to be shared values. Two of the shared valued were peaceful transition of power and respect for the rule of law / division of power between executive, legislative and judiciary.

Imho the values of MAGA republicans are clearly distinct from GWB republicans (even if it may be precisely the same voters). Specifically the two values described above are no longer shared values.

I believe there are more, but for the two values above we have irrevocable proof.

by daanlo

4/3/2025 at 9:30:16 PM

> what you are describing are republicans of the past

I know it seems that way but it has always seemed that way. Republicans talk about Democrats of the past (southern Democrats). Democrats talk about Republicans of the past (Lincoln). This feeling isn't new.

> Two of the shared valued were peaceful transition of power and respect for the rule of law / division of power between executive, legislative and judiciary.

Re: peaceful transition of power the Republicans insist (whether true or not) that January 6th was peaceful. The value is still there. Re: the rule of law, Republicans claim they are abiding by the law. (Are they not?) The value is still there. Division of power is certainly coming under question with the actions of DOGE, but I don't think the mere existence of DOGE is evidence that Republicans don't value the division of power. Some of these things aren't immediately obvious to everyone, especially if they are determined to be legal (whether we like the law or not).

We must resist the urge to demonize and dehumanize the opposition. That is exactly what is happening: even with our comments and upvotes we are collectively deciding that the opposition is out of their minds and are increasingly a foe to be vanquished. That is, frankly, stupidity of the masses.

by MetaWhirledPeas

4/3/2025 at 10:34:37 PM

If someone changes and begins to continually insists that something plainly untrue is true, does that mean that they possibly still have the values they used to? How long do you continue defending the "well, maybe..." case?

Throw out the Jan 6th example, it's now ancient history. As a party, Republicans are, at this very instant, claiming that judges are acting illegally for... using their constitutionally mandated legal powers. Simultaneously, but separately, the party apparatus is repeating on a daily basis a new conspiracy theory that the judges they don't like are being controlled by some nefarious power.

And it's a very, very well established playbook. We have many examples of countries that dismantled their systems of transition of power and division of power starting with the courts. It's a move that could pretty much make it into a "For Dummies" book.

"The value is still there." I can't see it. But maybe I'm too focused on judging on the entire scope of action and speech, rather than a very narrow bit of speech that isn't at all reflected in actions.

by telchior

4/3/2025 at 9:33:22 PM

While you broadly make a great point, there are psychological dimensions to take into consideration. Some people's personalities are more inclined toward tribalistic thinking and will extend their capacity for empathy only toward their own in-group, while others are capable of expanding the "in-group" to include all of humanity. So while it may be true to say that Republicans care about human rights, it is more accurate to say they care about their OWN human rights, and not the rights of people outside their in-group.

If you want to remove the political labeling from this statement, about 30% of the population "thinks" (or, rather, does not think, but acts) this way, and it is important to realize that the motivating factor differs between them and the other type of human, who cares about people in the abstract.

by popalchemist

4/3/2025 at 8:10:48 PM

Abortion rights is about religion-as clear a difference in values as one can have.

by Miraste

4/3/2025 at 7:53:25 PM

bingo!

by misiti3780

4/3/2025 at 8:14:36 PM

This was true a decade ago. It is no longer true.

The modern Trump controlled Republican party is not a party that cares about personal liberties. It is a fascist, authoritarian project that is toying with straight up Nazism. They are explicitly pulling from the Nazi playbook in their language and strategy of attack on the rule of law. Someone who supports that party is supporting a completely different set of values from someone who opposes it.

That said, that party is also backed by a powerful and effective propaganda machine that has successfully pulled the wool over many people's eyes such that they don't fully realize what it is they are supporting.

by dbingham

4/3/2025 at 8:43:17 PM

The left has called every Republican presidential candidate a Nazi/fascist/authoritarian since Ronald Reagan.

by cylinder714

4/3/2025 at 9:26:46 PM

this is far too broad of a generalization. just like it would be too broad of a generalization to declare all conservatives to be maga.

if we’re to believe trump he declares people to be “extreme leftists” who are clearly not even leftists.

so i find it highly unlikely that the entirety of “the left” called every republican presidential candidate these things.

by toofy

4/3/2025 at 9:31:48 PM

Doesn't matter what the left said previously, what matters is that the Trump Administration is behaving in an autocratic manner. Godwin's law has been abused online since forever, but you can just draw a comparison with Putin's ascent to autocratic rule in Russia.

by goatlover

4/3/2025 at 8:40:25 PM

[flagged]

by crscrosaplsauc

4/3/2025 at 7:51:13 PM

> In this world, asking "who did you vote for" isn't a matter of tribalism, but it is a (good) proxy for asking someone "what are your values".

I strongly disagree. In this duopoly of a political system, most people on both sides are just picking the lesser of two evils. Meanwhile, we are creating an alarmingly decisive political society by choosing not to associate with those who vote differently than us. Perhaps most importantly, we lose the opportunity to actually shift the political positions of others (and ourselves) by not engaging in healthy and non-judgmental political discussions with our friends and neighbors, ultimately increasing polarization even further.

Not everyone is voting based on their values—some are simply voting their wallets or the special interests they align with. Someone who is pro-choice, pro-LGBT, and pro-immigration may very well vote Republican because they work in the US Automotive industry, and so do their friends and families and people who they care most about. It doesn’t necessarily mean their core values are different than yours, but instead maybe simply just their priorities.

by rzz3

4/3/2025 at 11:21:02 PM

Also some people don't vote for someone, they vote against someone else.

by m463

4/3/2025 at 8:41:00 PM

> pro-choice, pro-LGBT, and pro-immigration may very well vote Republican because they work in the US Automotive industry, and so do their friends and families and people who they care most about.

What you care most about is a statement of values.

by rebeccaskinner

4/3/2025 at 10:23:39 PM

Sure but if you're so reductionist then you'd also be arguing that slaves were making a statement about their values and how they viewed slavery because the majority didn't immediately escape or die trying. It would be disingenuous to say or even imply from that statement that their value system was pro slavery though.

by greycol

4/3/2025 at 5:32:43 PM

I would say that the partial counterpoint to that is, for most people their values are also largely tribe based, in that their values are not purely fixed, but rather tend to adapt to loosely track the tribal consensus. Very few are the ones willing to stick to their convictions under pressure.

There are clearly some (many?) shared average axiomatic values that seem to be common between very different cultures/religions (although individuals vary much more significantly), but it's much easier to obsess on the places we differ.

Where I strongly disagree is the idea that groups with different fundamental values can't necessarily find common policy ground. A good example is Basic Income, where you can find agreement between groups on opposite sides that both embrace the idea, but for very different value-driven reasons. In many cases, you can also agree to disagree, and just keep your collective hands out of it (eg. separation of religion and state).

by dwallin

4/3/2025 at 6:34:58 PM

[dead]

by biasednor

4/3/2025 at 7:49:31 PM

> For the last 20 years at least, the leadership of the two main political parties in the US have largely invested in messaging around the values that they represent.

The largest two U.S. parties have been heavily minmaxing the propaganda they release to divide districts on the most effective issues they can convert into election wins. Their values are "get elected to office" but the propaganda can't be so straightforward because there aren't a lot of voters who are easily converted by that directness.

Voters have values; political parties and candidates have propaganda. Game theoretically the winning move is to compete on comparative advantage of an issue within a voting district; because (for example) Democratic voters are split on the death penalty it's a very useless propaganda point for the party as a whole [0]; sticking to one side or the other would lose more elections than it would win. Note that this is very different from ranking the importance of values and focusing on the most impactful to real people; the (implicit) hope is that by focusing on effective propaganda issues then some values may be preserved through the election process. In practice politicians also horse-trade for future party political capital in preference to espoused values.

One fundamental problem is that without a parliamentary style of government where coalitions are required to form a functioning legislature the usefulness of values in elections is greatly diminished. If I may say, the Republican party has done the best at shedding the illusion and explicitly transferring power to the party itself to enforce the values held by one man, which is the ultimate game-theoretically strong position for a political party. Disconnecting the ultimate value-judged outcomes of elections from the political machinations that win them has been incredibly damaging to democracy.

[0] https://www.salon.com/2024/08/31/the-end-of-the-abolition-er...

by benlivengood

4/3/2025 at 5:09:30 PM

I reject this idea, someone voting for the "least worst candidate" does not wholly endorse everything they stand for

As someone said in this thread, in the US two-party system, coalitions are formed before the vote vs after in other countries

The whole purpose of this piece is to precisely encourage pointed discussion about values directly and skip the proxying

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 5:13:15 PM

"someone voting for the "least worst candidate" does not wholly endorse everything they stand for"

yes but somebody voting for the "most worst candidate" is not somebody who's values should be trusted

by rfgmendoza

4/3/2025 at 5:29:42 PM

and if someone opposite the aisle from you believes the same thing about you, there's zero chance to flip them

with direct discussion about values, it's possible

basically all comes down to "are you open to the chance you're wrong"

you could view that chance as low as 0.001%, but it shouldn't be 0

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 5:40:03 PM

People frequently have a gap between their values and their politics, and talking about both can reveal the cognitive dissonance.

If they engage with politics as tribalism, and you talk to them about a policy their tribe implemented that conflicts with their values, this is useful.

by sn9

4/3/2025 at 5:20:42 PM

The very idea of “least worst” is very subjective. In their eyes, if they disagree with you, it is who’s values should not be trusted.

by darth_avocado

4/3/2025 at 6:58:56 PM

> I reject this idea, someone voting for the "least worst candidate" does not wholly endorse everything they stand for

The thing about values is that they don't just capture the notion of what we thing is right or wrong, but also which things we value over other things. In an extreme case, two people can agree on 10 out of 10 different ideals or ethical stances and still have different values and support different parties because of how they rank those things.

In that case who you think is the "least worst" is also a reflection of values, as is declaring both sides to be the same, or opting out altogether. They all represent both what things you value and how much you value them.

by rebeccaskinner

4/3/2025 at 7:17:35 PM

> In that case who you think is the "least worst" is also a reflection of values

perceived values -- if someone has the same values and rankings as you, but was exposed to different information, then with this logic you'll never be able to find out or flip them

as I said to the other commenter, basically all comes down to "are you open to the chance you're wrong"

you could view that chance as low as 0.001%, but it shouldn't be 0

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 7:40:12 PM

I think the assumption that political parties represent two completely distinct sets of values is overly simplistic. In reality, there's a significant amount of overlap between them—what often differs is the style of messaging and the framing of ideas.

Personally, I find it hard to fully identify with either the left or the right. I share beliefs and values from both sides, depending on the issue. This makes it difficult to adopt a clear-cut political label, and I think that's true for many people.

Politics today often feels more like a battle of narratives than a clash of core principles / values.

p.s. my perspective is non-US one.

by zkid18

4/3/2025 at 6:22:51 PM

> leadership of the two main political parties in the US have largely invested in messaging around the values that they represent

I'd say they invest in messaging around the values they want voters to believe they represent.

i.e., marketing and ensuing reality diverge regularly with politicians, regardless of affiliation.

by jjtheblunt

4/3/2025 at 6:15:13 PM

> "who did you vote for" isn't a matter of tribalism, but it is a (good) proxy for asking someone "what are your values"

You should test this hypothesis by talking to someone for 10 minutes, then guessing who they voted for.

My hypothesis is you wouldn't do better than 50/50.

by cj

4/3/2025 at 6:41:28 PM

"If p then q" does not imply "If q then p."

Besides, there's a ton of easy ways to beat 50/50 odds without explicitly asking who they voted for. You can ask whether they graduated from college, and that will get you to something like 55/45 or 60/40. If they're white and they did not graduate from college, or if they're not white and they did graduate from college, your odds of guessing right are something like 2:1.

Studies have also found (somewhat weak) correlations between some of the Big Five personality traits and political identification: people who score highly on conscientiousness are more likely to be right-leaning, while people who score highly on openness to experience are more likely to be left-leaning.

by MajimasEyepatch

4/3/2025 at 7:40:08 PM

> "If p then q" does not imply "If q then p."

My original comment is challenging whether "p then q" is valid in the first place by asking if the inverse would be true as a thought experiment. (Neither is true IMO)

Just because someone has certain values doesn't mean they vote a certain way.

Just because they vote a certain way doesn't mean they have certain values.

"p" (who you voted for) and "q" (your values) are largely independent for a large percentage of voters.

by cj

4/3/2025 at 10:51:47 PM

My point is that the validity and soundness of the inverse proposition has no bearing on the validity and soundness of the original proposition, so you’ve proposed a meaningless experiment.

I also think that your hypothesis that voting and values are not connected is false, but that’s a separate issue.

by MajimasEyepatch

4/3/2025 at 10:58:01 PM

I understand your point and I agree with it. I didn't respond to it directly because it wasn't contributing to the discussion at hand. But I agree with your point that an inverse proposition doesn't always hold!

by cj

4/3/2025 at 7:23:43 PM

The hypothesis is that knowing a person's voting activity helps one to predict that individual's values. I don't think the parent is claiming that the values that might be revealed by a 10 minute conversation are a predictor for voting activity. I think there's a distinction, since people can - and, in my perspective, often do - misrepresent or misidentify their true values in their conversations with strangers. I am assuming that people act on their true values, not necessarily those that they advertise, when they fill out ballots.

by crackrook

4/3/2025 at 7:10:06 PM

The is a really good, IMO, Saturday Night Live skit about this where the contestants try to guess Republican or not of various people. Some of the bits do a great job of pointing out how some of the values people claim to believe in are only applied selectivity when it benefits their side.

by bandofthehawk

4/3/2025 at 6:36:24 PM

I was talking to a very drunk Republican girl the other day. We were having a small argument about why we would send medical support to Africa for AIDS. Her argument was something about fixing America first (I was also drunk).

I asked if she regretted her vote for Trump after several people she knew lost their government contracting jobs, and she said "No, fuck that guy, I didn't vote for him."

by J5892

4/3/2025 at 8:54:02 PM

That's why I love claiming to be a third-party voter so much. It breaks their brains and their response informs whether or not they are worthy of my respect.

by BeFlatXIII

4/3/2025 at 6:09:45 PM

> In truth, values and ethics are fundamental to effectively discussing politics.

People generally haven't formed strong opinions on most issues, and defer to party or a leader they like for the remaining. They'll still happily argue about it for the post part, unfortunately.

You can see this effect after some elections where people "fall in line" with their party's new presidential candidate on some issue.

by nitwit005

4/3/2025 at 6:18:58 PM

> People generally haven't formed strong opinions on most issues, and defer to party or a leader they like for the remaining.

I call this "politics as religion".

Remember you cannot reason someone out of a position they never reasoned themselves into. Route around the damage and make them irrelevant.

by DrillShopper

4/3/2025 at 7:48:29 PM

> The policies are different too, but over time we've gone from a world where there were at least some cases where the two parties had different policies for how to reach the same goals, and into a world where the parties policies are aiming to realize fundamentally different visions of the world, based on fundamentally different values.

What difference do the parties have? They are both the 'corporate party' maximizing shareholder profit at all costs including killing brown people overseas or murdering Americans at home if they cant pay for healthcare.

by dumbledoren

4/3/2025 at 5:56:56 PM

Even the language that the different parties use is targeted at certain sets of values; Arnold Kling wrote this short book on the subject ("The Three Languages of Politics"): https://cdn.cato.org/libertarianismdotorg/books/ThreeLanguag...

"The Righteous Mind" by Jonathan Haidt is another, more nuanced (and complicated), but extremely interesting take on the subject of how values drive political affiliation.

by nickff

4/3/2025 at 6:40:39 PM

Framing has always been used in political debate just to target certain values; what may have changed (or not) is as a deliberate tactic to keep people divided: folks who do not speak the same language cannot communicate.

On a lot of issues, I think 80% of folks are in 80% of agreement, but the partisans (whether politicians or activists) are framing the issue to prevent that consensus, because the partisans want something in the 20% that 80% of folks don't agree with.

by brightlancer

4/3/2025 at 6:52:56 PM

Kling and Haidt would agree with your respective paragraphs, though they do add a lot of color, and their books are worth reading.

by nickff

4/3/2025 at 9:13:17 PM

I've listened to Haidt speak about it and his book is in my tall stack to read; I don't think I'd heard of King but I grabbed the PDF. Thank you.

by brightlancer

4/3/2025 at 6:36:12 PM

This makes 0 sense. Democrat and Republican "values", to the extent they are even real, no way represent the full spectrum of values one can have.

Further, the Democratic party has a 27% approval rating and the Republican party had like 47% and I bet its falling. So even within your narrow framework this is a bad proxy because both are clearly unpopular.

by wand3r

4/3/2025 at 9:19:17 PM

Your need to insult the author proved his point.

by TwoNineFive

4/3/2025 at 7:40:06 PM

The two sides dont actually have different values, they have small wedge issues that unscrupulous individuals/groups over-exaggerate for their own gain. Im center left but still see myself in Trump supporters, were basically the same people who basically want to live our lives

by bad_haircut72

4/3/2025 at 8:25:12 PM

> to realize fundamentally different visions of the world, based on fundamentally different values

I think your use of the word "world" is telling.

Trump, the Republicans, and the global right are focused on their citizens.

The Democrats and the global left are more focused on the world and their role in it.

It's no longer just two approaches on how we can have the strongest economy. Each party has a weighting for how much to consider every issue across the world.

For example, there are people who would be happy with less growth, lower income, but more action on climate change.

by erlich

4/3/2025 at 6:27:30 PM

> For the last 20 years at least, the leadership of the two main political parties in the US have largely invested in messaging around the values that they represent.

Except that the "values" each promotes are often inconsistent with other "values" they promote, sometimes to the point of absurd irrationality, e.g. marijuana vs tobacco or alcohol.

And other "values" are completely independent, but correlate so highly that "tribalism" is a much better explainer, e.g. abortion and guns.

> and into a world where the parties policies are aiming to realize fundamentally different visions of the world, based on fundamentally different values.

That's not new.

On a very high level, the two major parties do want everyone to be healthy, wealthy and wise -- the issue is that they disagree on what those words mean, and what should be sacrificed (and by whom) to achieve it, which means the two major parties have always had very different visions of the future.

> If you discover that someone has completely different values from you, then discussing policy isn't going to be useful anyway, because there's no way you'll agree on a single policy when you have different fundamental values.

And that right there is a call to tribalism: Don't bother with Those People, They Have Different Values, They Aren't Like Us.

by brightlancer

4/3/2025 at 6:53:45 PM

> Don't bother with Those People, They Have Different Values, They Aren't Like Us

I didn't say that you shouldn't bother with people. I said that discussing _policy_ is not useful if you don't agree on _values_. It's the wrong level of abstraction. To put it in a plain analogy: discussing the best route to get to your destination isn't useful if you don't agree on where you are going.

If you want to engage with someone with different values, then the values are where you need to start. If you want to engage with someone on the best way to get somewhere, you need to start by making sure you both agree on where you want to go.

by rebeccaskinner

4/3/2025 at 5:38:18 PM

> In this world, asking "who did you vote for" isn't a matter of tribalism, but it is a (good) proxy for asking someone "what are your values".

Only if you ascertain the (inverse of the) mapping of values -> vote correctly, and it's definitively not what the parties or the tribes themselves profess.

For myself [0], I sympathize with many of the issues Trump ran on while finding most of the Democratic platform cloying and hollow. But I value effective policy, being accountable to intellectual criticism, and a generally open society far far more. (And at this point in my life, a healthy dose of straight up actual conservatism, too!)

[0] and while it might seem needlessly inflammatory to include this here, I think it's unavoidable that people are going to be trying to read partisan implications from abstract comments regardless.

by mindslight

4/3/2025 at 6:09:16 PM

> it is a (good) proxy for asking someone "what are your values". If you discover that someone has completely different values from you

No, it’s a prejudice. People have a very short analysis and are generally not ready for their beliefs to be discussed.

Most people believe the definition of left is “good” and right is “bad”. Like, they literally believe this is how people identify their side. “Oh yes you’re rightwing, that’s because you don’t mind being selfish, self-serving, evil even. That’s your conception of the world.”

Not at all. I’m social, therefore I am right-wing. I care about women’s rights, therefore I am right-wing. I want poor people to get help, therefore I am right-wing. The left wing has a pro-immigration “at all cost” policy and it means women are raped. It’s systematic and part of what authors aren’t jailed for. The left has a pro-poor policy and therefore poverty develops while leftwing electoralites have unsanctioned lavish parties with the commons’ money (lavish parties ala Weinstein for which metoo stories surface a dozen years later).

Leftists can’t fathom that I have literally the same pro-women anti-poverty values as they have. If anything, leftists judge (and pre-emptively sanction!) people on prejudice.

by eastbound

4/3/2025 at 6:45:47 PM

You kinda seem selfish, self-serving - evil, even.

by nadir_ishiguro

4/3/2025 at 8:02:40 PM

I'm not a leftist. Your leader and his allies are a danger to democracy. I don't get this from the Democratic Party, or ANTIFA, or Bernie Sanders. I get it from paying attention to what Trump and his administration have been doing.

by goatlover

4/3/2025 at 7:04:24 PM

Values are largely posturing. Push comes to shove most people don't really care about what they say they care about. Tribal heuristics of trust are way more important.

by andrewclunn

4/3/2025 at 1:08:01 PM

The crucial question is what is "politics"? Are personalities politics? No. Are parties? No. Are inflammatory issues about race, sex or gender or political correctness or immigration? No!

Here is politics:

Are common American citizens able to afford and obtain reasonable health care?

Are common Americans paid a living wage? Can one person earn enough to have a family?

Do our children have a reasonable opportunity to grow, have a productive life and have a family if they want one?

Is the financial situation getting better for Americans or is the difference between earnings and expenditures growing larger. (Hint do we use code words like 'inflation' instead of calling it like it is).

A functioning democracy requires that the common people are enable to formulate and enact laws that they believe are in their best interests. Do the majority of the laws enacted in all the states meet this requirement?

A functioning democracy requires that the common people are able to use the law and courts to right wrongs. Are the common people able to use/afford access to the courts when wrongs are committed.

Do the common news media act as a forum for the common concerns and issues of the People. (Here's looking at you NYT).

Cuo Bono? If the laws passed are not in the interests of the People, and the courts are not accessible by People, who benefits? If the news media are not a forum for the interests of the People, whose interests do they represent. (Here's looking at you Jeff Bezos).

If advertising funds our primary sources of news, whose interests are represented.

Those are simply things you should discuss with your friends. They are questions not answers. This is not rocket science.

by talkingtab

4/3/2025 at 1:33:46 PM

These are real problems. But they are also loaded questions, if someone asked me these at a party I would view them as looking for confirmation, and not seeking truth. There's nothing wrong with that, but the author's goal is curiosity and truth seeking, and I'm skeptical that most of these questions align with that goal.

by cle

4/3/2025 at 5:12:06 PM

The ironic thing to me is that the author essentially makes this the main point right from the get go:

> The insidious nature of this question comes from the false representation as earnest, intellectual discourse. Many who ask it may truly believe they’re engaging earnestly, but their responses quickly reveal an angle more akin to religious police.

As you point out, nearly all of talkingtab's questions are loaded. At the very least, talkingtab essentially says outright what they expect the "correct" answer to be, e.g I'm baffled why talkingtab seems to think "inflation" is a "code word". I speak English, and inflation is "telling it like it is" based on the simple definition of the word.

As another example, for this question:

> Are common Americans paid a living wage? Can one person earn enough to have a family?

What happens if a response is "No, I don't believe that cashiers at McDonald's deserve to be paid a 'living wage', because I don't believe that job is intended to support a family on its own"? To emphasize, I'm not saying what the "right" answer is, but I do believe reasonable people can disagree over what constitutes a living wage and which jobs deserve to be paid it.

If anything, talkingtab's post just highlights to me the author's specific point about political "tribes" vs political views, and if anything has convinced me more that the author's view is spot on here.

by hn_throwaway_99

4/3/2025 at 6:44:28 PM

> the author essentially makes this the main point right from the get go

Then find better friends. The author is essentially complaining about the quality of his friends.

by JumpCrisscross

4/3/2025 at 9:02:12 PM

Ah, yes, those pesky humans and their cognitive biases...

by hn_throwaway_99

4/3/2025 at 6:40:31 PM

My read is that talkingtab’s agenda here is to focus the conversation on what politics is. Rather than being this thing you discuss with people (or not) it’s about injustice against the majority. So why does that get brought up? Because with the OP it’s easy to end up concluding that politics to the average person is something you choose to idly or deliberately or max-brainpower chatter with other people about. Then it can be easily thought that it’s just about differing policy positions. But talkingtab is saying that it’s more confrontational than that.

So why are the questions “loaded”? Because as you can see with your own eyes, they have their own political agenda. Part of politics is defining what the the agenda should be—and what should be considered political.

As you can imagine, people who think they are arguing or fighting on behalf of people making a living wage etc. want to put that message out there. They are not discussing abstract concepts or competing in some open-mindedness competition or some rationality contest. It matters to them.

> If anything, talkingtab's post just highlights to me the author's specific point about political "tribes" vs political views, and if anything has convinced me more that the author's view is spot on here.

You are even more convinced. Yet there is nothing here that suggests that talkingtab is tribal in the sense of what the OP is talking about. None. Is this received opinion or opinion born from studying like a monk for 10 years? You don’t know.

You also say that talkingtab is presenting what the “correct” answer is. Yes, according to them. Again, is it really tribalism? Or is it conviction as well as the polemic tone of the whole comment? And having conviction doesn’t mean that you cannot conceive of people having other opinions, or being intellectually unable to present counter-arguments to their own position. Again, no proof of tribalism is presented.

And this focus on tribalism presupposes that the end goal is to find your tone. Alternatively you can look at their arguments. Maybe they want to change the flaws they perceive in the world.

by keybored

4/3/2025 at 3:05:24 PM

The strawmanning of arguments from both sides is so intense that most people lay in a bed composed entirely of strawman arguments. I firmly blame the media above all for this, but individuals carry a burden to for not trying to remake their bed.

It took me 15 years to to remake my bed into somewhat rational arguments, and still I find lots of hay in there. Generally both sides, or all sides really, want the same things and disagree on how to get there. And the truth is there is almost never an obvious or clear way to get there. It's fractal pros and cons all the way down.

by Workaccount2

4/3/2025 at 3:12:59 PM

> but individuals carry a burden to for not trying to remake their bed

In what way? I turn on Fox sometimes and it's not that it's slanted, but it's just a stream of lies and BS. I've watched a bunch of Trump's speeches and in addition to being incoherent, he says the same lies and BS all the way down. Yesterday's tariff speech was a great example.

I don't consider myself progressive (though the MAGA right would think me so), but where do I go to try and 'remake [my] bed'?

by matwood

4/3/2025 at 3:36:23 PM

I think what's meant is that you need to be open to changing your opinion and manner of approach to things. To stay with the analogy: when you "remake" your bed and it ends up the same, chances are that you didn't try to improve on its design.

By turning on Fox sometimes (provided it's not your main source) you might already not fall into the category of people not trying to remake their bed.

by ablob

4/3/2025 at 4:50:01 PM

Wait, we're designing bedding now? Not just remaking our beds? What a strained analogy that when you 'remake' your bed and it's the 'same' (why would it be different?) then you didn't improve the design?? Even more shocking is that you ran with this as opposed to realizing that these were warning signs that either your fundamental argument is ridiculous, or your analogy is.

by freejazz

4/3/2025 at 3:54:28 PM

Well, the first thing is to realize CNN is also just a stream of lies and BS. Every media news organization in the world has become (they always were?) pure garbage.

Listening to first-hand sources is the way, I guess, but also remembering they can be lying as well, so be vigilant.

by nomdep

4/3/2025 at 4:13:44 PM

It's true, because all the upper levels of ALL large media organizations have been infiltrated by big-moneyed conservatives.

CNN and NBC weren't always as bad as they are now, but their descent has been obvious and dramatic.

Some of them still employ democrats to some minimal extent, such as Jamelle Bouie at the NYT, but that's merely subterfuge, lest their bent be glaringly obvious.

If someone can name a large organization that is an exception to my first paragraph, I would be happy to learn of them.

by MrMcCall

4/3/2025 at 3:17:29 PM

> Generally both sides, or all sides really, want the same things and disagree on how to get there.

No, that is just not true. For example, do you think Putin and his supporters wanted a functioning democracy in Russia and independent Ukraine? No, they wanted someone functioning as a dictator to restore Russia's cold war territory and influence, and they wanted to undermine western democracies that stood in their way.

History does not support your claim that everyone wants the same things. Some people want power and strong man to take over the government. We see that with the Trump administration. The religious conservatives want to use that to make America a Christian nation. The billionaire libertarians want to use it to deregulate their industries and run the government like a corporation. And Trump wants to act unilaterally to bring about his vision of being seen as some great figure. They have illiberal aims.

by goatlover

4/3/2025 at 3:31:22 PM

I'm speaking about the collectives, not the individuals. There are always deranged individuals and some of them, many of them, manage to get in power. But the ideological collectives all have pretty much the same core goals. Needs met, population happy.

by Workaccount2

4/3/2025 at 3:59:32 PM

What's your threshold where an "individual" becomes a "collective"? Certainly billionaire libertarians, religious conservatives, Putin and his supporters and the Trump administration (along with the judges he's appointed, the people in congress and state governments who ran on his platform and the 10s of millions of Americans who voted for them) are not individuals...

They also very obviously want different things compared to others.

by dfxm12

4/3/2025 at 5:31:04 PM

Shy of a few fringe groups, I am not aware of any large suffering & death collectives. Every large collective is trying to achieve a better life for it's adherents, and is always welcoming to those who want to join. Christains might see living is the light of Jesus as the ideal life, and while not for everyone, you should at least be able to understand why they feel that way (as opposed to a religion of self inflicted torture).

Remember the goal here is not to become sympathetic to Trump, or Putin, or Sanders, or Netanyahu, or Islam. The goal is to have an accurate understanding of them, so that when you form arguments against them, you are actually attacking bedrock and not just straw.

by Workaccount2

4/3/2025 at 6:35:02 PM

> Christains might see living is the light of Jesus as the ideal life, and while not for everyone, you should at least be able to understand why they feel that way (as opposed to a religion of self inflicted torture).

Yes, but also we've seen how they've behaved in the past when they had vast political power in Europe. And we see what the goals of the Heritage Foundation is with Project 2025. There have always been a decent number of conservative Christians who want prayer, the bible and ten commandments in school. Who don't want legal abortion or gay marriage. And the more power they have, the more they would restrict. They also tend to believe in a lot of conspiracy theories, like the Democratic Party being controlled by satanists and communists, who have also infiltrated the "Deep State".

So you can imagine how those beliefs play out with enough political power.

by goatlover

4/3/2025 at 4:03:27 PM

politics, especially international geopolitics is a zero-sum game. The game of competition for limited resources and markets. Because resources are limited, the pie is fixed, and this makes it zero sum game.

Although there is a way to frame political alliances as a win-win when two parties increase their share at a cost of some other third party losing theirs.

Because of that, the arguments will always be straw-man, because people want to win resources, not to argue in good faith.

Any political issue can be framed in terms of zero sum game, if you look at the whole picture

by slt2021

4/3/2025 at 4:26:12 PM

This is incorrect. There are few physical resources that we have reached the limit of, such that one entity’s gain is necessarily another’s loss. There are also a great many things of value that aren’t simply raw resources, for which the pie will never be fixed, because the pie is made by humans and can be made bigger or smaller.

This zero-sum narrative is only true in a world of no growth, where all resources are being fully utilized to maximum effect. That is very far from the world we live in, where there is enormous room for additional extraction, creation, and efficient utilization of resources.

by Vegenoid

4/3/2025 at 5:27:41 PM

the zero sum will always be true because of the fundamental law of physics: Law of preservation of energy.

Everything in the economy thats worth producing/consuming costs energy and labor. Energy and labor is not free.

You may be conflating win-win with debt-based growth, where economy can grow at the cost of running fiscal deficit and accumulating debt. Sure the economy and market can grow, but the debt will also grow and the inflation will cancel out the nominal growth

by slt2021

4/3/2025 at 5:57:33 PM

We use about 1 part in 10000 of the sun's energy deposit on earth... No, we are _really_ far away from preservation of energy being a limiting problem

by hnaccount_rng

4/3/2025 at 5:59:32 PM

yes, the only way to increase economy without stealing from someone else is technological advancement and efficiency improvements (which amounts to R&D spend = $$$$)

by slt2021

4/3/2025 at 5:20:46 PM

I guess I can interpret the strongest form of your argument to suggest that resources and markets have a specific level of economically relevant supply at any specific time, which I suppose is an empirical claim that’s true. I feel like recent days’ trade policy earthquakes might operate along a similar line of reasoning: there’s only so much, “they’ve” been getting better off, which means they’ve been “taking” from the US, so the US is taking back.

In the same sense it’s true that there are only so many bushels of seed corn left after the winter. At the moment, we can squabble over how to divide the fixed supply. I could take all the corn, eat half, keep the rest for myself to plant this season. Or, if I’ve already got enough to plant all my land, and you’ve got more land and nothing else to do, I could invest some of my leftover corn with you and we can all have double the harvest in a few months… when the supply will have dramatically expanded, assuming I don’t treat it as a zero-sum game right now. Or I could focus on “winning” right now, and we’ll both be poorer after the harvest than we would have been otherwise.

While I agree that you could frame most any political issue in zero-sum terms, I feel like the blind spot is the same: it tallies the score based on assumptions fixed in time, and it takes a pessimistic view of cooperative potential, of humans’ power to influence the constraints themselves.

by alwa

4/3/2025 at 5:32:14 PM

the zero sum will always be true because of the fundamental law of physics: Law of preservation of energy / Law of preservation of matter.

Everything in the economy thats worth producing/consuming costs energy and labor. Energy and labor is not free.

Any free lunch one can have in the economy is only possible in nominal terms, when your economy/market grows, but your sovereign debt and fiscal deficit also grows and in real terms, after inflation there is no real growth.

if you look at the core, the bottom of the economics it is just pure physics: The flow and exchange of energy and materials, labor and capital. The fight is over a distribution of the flows between various factions

by slt2021

4/3/2025 at 4:18:52 PM

That's not how economics works. The pie is not fixed, it tends to grow over time as there's more trade between countries and their economies get bigger. The global economic pie has increased a massive amount over the past century.

by goatlover

4/3/2025 at 5:26:18 PM

the trade has increased because jobs have been offshored, corporations have been running labor cost arbitrage and making a profit from a difference in labor cost in US vs elsewhere

by slt2021

4/3/2025 at 6:43:56 PM

And as with most arbitrages, costs have lowered as a result. It means a piece of technology with thousands of individual parts can be in your hand for $200. Labor efficiency differences have resulted in an explosion of value-for-dollar for the American consumer.

by freeone3000

4/3/2025 at 2:01:03 PM

I always wondered, what those Pinkerton man thought, when they attacked union members with machine guns for their masters in the guilded age.

by InDubioProRubio

4/3/2025 at 2:04:44 PM

They thought "Well, I guess this makes me one of those people for whom "Not talking about politics with Friends" becomes a core tenent to my personal philosophy."

by rpd9803

4/3/2025 at 2:34:13 PM

They thought that the union members were criminals.

by analog31

4/3/2025 at 3:24:13 PM

Without the ability to realize that it's politics that defines what a criminal is.

by pixl97

4/3/2025 at 6:19:50 PM

Unfortunately they're thinking the same thing today.

by sylos

4/3/2025 at 3:26:20 PM

The original argument put forth by capitalists was that unionized workers were effectively engaging in economic sabotage by striking and blockading factories.

That said the Pinkertons were basically mercenaries akin to organized crime, so probably viewed things in terms of might makes right.

by exoverito

4/3/2025 at 6:08:43 PM

They are both real problems and loaded questions. Okay. Ostensibly the point of politics is to solve problems that people have. That will lead to people putting forth what they think the problems are. We simply don’t have time to theorize every concievable potential problem and then, one by one, painstakingly (with our minds wide open like an open brain surgery) consider whether they are in fact problems that people have.

All of these pointed questions can also be disputed.

by keybored

4/3/2025 at 3:18:07 PM

Actually they make great conversion. Preface with, “Why is neither party talking about…” and you’ll find that most people agree.

by paulsutter

4/3/2025 at 3:54:13 PM

Then lead them to the understanding that both parties are right-wing? (support the current economic system, support mass-murdering brown people overseas, support embezzling for personal gain as long as they don't get caught, etc)

by immibis

4/3/2025 at 4:07:46 PM

> support embezzling for personal gain as long as they don't get caught

If you think this is a strictly right-wing characteristic you are hopelessly partisan.

by aerostable_slug

4/3/2025 at 7:51:34 PM

Notice that I said both parties do it.

by immibis

4/3/2025 at 2:19:56 PM

[flagged]

by moolcool

4/3/2025 at 2:39:54 PM

> fascism and fascist ideologies

This is political dog-whistling. As Orwell pointed out almost eight decades ago: "The word Fascism has now no meaning except in so far as it signifies ‘something not desirable’."[1] and is now obviously only a dog-whistle for fellow ideologues. This does not belong on HN.

[1] https://www.orwellfoundation.com/the-orwell-foundation/orwel...

by throw10920

4/3/2025 at 3:06:05 PM

I agree the term is vague. But what then would you have us call it? The whole, constitutional crisis, outright flouting of the rule of law, suspension of due process/disappearing of political enemies in the streets type thing that is verifiably happening right now. Are you requesting that the word fascism be banned from HN? Have you seen the videos of legal college students being shoved into unmarked vans by unmarked and masked officers of the law? What do you call that? The talk of a third term?

I'd love to say, "he's just blustering", it's what my father said but he's enacted just about every thing he said. Should he begin speaking about a third term i don't think we have the luxury to ignore that anymore. To annex our nearby "allies" who've now become a united front opposing any economic relationship. What is that called? What would you have us say?

by wholinator2

4/3/2025 at 3:41:46 PM

Why not give it a new name? We could do so with Marxism, Leninism, Maoism, etc. There is no reason we have to stop giving these phenomena a new name. You can always talk about the similarities, but if you mix it carelessly you'll lose the differences.

by ablob

4/3/2025 at 4:03:44 PM

You can't call Trump a fascist, he has yet to have the trains run on time.

by oeitho

4/3/2025 at 3:46:00 PM

>But what then would you have us call it?

Most people say "fascist" when at most they mean "authoritarian". But maybe the latter's not scary enough for the boogeyman you want to evoke. Sometimes they say it when they should say demagoguery (which is, in my opinion, more than alarming enough of a word in ways that I can forgive people for feeling "populist" isn't). Quite often though, people merely mean "distasteful", but since tastes vary quite a bit, this might not alarm anyone at all.

>suspension of due process/disappearing of political enemies

You mean that when they send people back to their home countries because they're no longer welcome here?

>The talk of a third term?

From a man so old and in such ill health it seems quite likely he won't survive his second term? Mostly he's just trying to get a rise out of you. I don't like bullies, but when they do the "made you flinch" thing, part of me wants to smirk. Couldn't you just this once not flinch?

>To annex our nearby "allies"

He did it in the most asshole way possible, but offering them a proportionate number of votes in our Senate is hardly the insult they make it out to be. Especially when they're all dragged along by our policy already and just have no say in it whatsoever. "We want you to join the richest and most powerful nation on Earth and the benefits are truly too long to list" shouldn't send them running away screaming in terror.

by NoMoreNicksLeft

4/3/2025 at 4:16:53 PM

>You mean that when they send people back to their home countries because they're no longer welcome here?

> I don't like bullies, but when they do the "made you flinch" thing, part of me wants to smirk.

You like bullies, actually - you just don't like thinking you like bullies.

by alxjrvs

4/3/2025 at 8:08:13 PM

Then why does part of me always wish you were clever enough to not flinch, just once, and show them up?

I keep waiting for it to happen. Hoping. And yet you always disappoint.

by NoMoreNicksLeft

4/3/2025 at 4:26:01 PM

> You mean that when they send people back to their home countries because they're no longer welcome here?

Illegally, without due process. That's why a federal judge has been ruling against them on this. They also lied that everyone deported was part of a Venezuelan gang (or at least that they had proper grounds for thinking so, thus the importance of due process), and they lied that it was some kind of invasion.

by goatlover

4/3/2025 at 8:15:02 PM

>Illegally, without due process.

And what process, exactly, is due? Why is it due? My understanding of the term is that due process is mostly that because everyone gets the same... if some are getting different treatment, this raises due process concerns. If there was never any process designed, or if it has been abandoned. The bureaucracy can change the rules to some extent, they are not written in stone.

>That's why a federal judge has been ruling against them on this.

No one believes that, not even the left. They're happy that it's occurring of course, and they're clever enough to pretend that they've got real arguments... but in the back of their minds they know that the federal judge would rule against this no matter what, because the Trump administration is doing it. After all, for a full 2 months afterward they had people who were claiming the election was rigged and hoping that somehow that it would be invalidated. Their imaginations ran wild with ever-more-fanciful schemes. Now that's not happening, they've moved on and believe their in some sort of counter-coup.

>and they lied that it was some kind of invasion.

What's the definition of "invasion"? If an enemy were to invade with tanks and guns, they'd be wiped out. A clever enemy might just encourage its people to "migrate". To foment a sort of economic war. Or the word invasion can even have more metaphorical or casual usage. If someone says that mice have invaded their home do you complain that the word "invade" is wrong because the mice aren't wearing military uniforms and trying to accomplish some general's strategy?

by NoMoreNicksLeft

4/3/2025 at 2:56:50 PM

Even if you think it’s a dog whistle, Facism does mean something and it’s rather more accurate to use it now than say, 30 years ago.

by Aeolun

4/3/2025 at 3:01:13 PM

No, it does not mean anything. Different people from the same side of the political spectrum define it differently, let alone different parts of the spectrum. If you don't define it before using it, it's a dog-whistle, full stop.

by throw10920

4/3/2025 at 4:11:19 PM

I've heard this dismissal a good bit often ("that's just a nothing word that means 'bad thing I don't like' ") but that's really just not true.

It has been consistently defined through the decades, especially during the 20th century. Here's one common example you can find from the 1983 American Heritage Dictionary and it sounds pretty familiar:

"A system of government that exercises a dictatorship of the extreme right, typically through the merging of state and business leadership, together with belligerent nationalism."

by soupfordummies

4/3/2025 at 3:07:39 PM

Dog whistle for what? Please define what it is a dog whistle for. Maybe in that context you'll find the common definition understood by people using it

by wholinator2

4/3/2025 at 4:05:25 PM

One could do worse than using Eco's Ur-Fascism[1] as the starting point. The man had personal experience and he could write (oh how he could write.) However, I'd expect that some would dismiss him as an inveterate lefty (he wasn't), so we're back on square one.

[1] https://archive.org/details/umberto-eco-ur-fascism/umberto-e...

by inejge

4/3/2025 at 3:07:11 PM

Speaking of words having meanings, what exactly do you mean by dog-whistle here? I understand dog-whistle to mean coded language for a different concept.

by anamexis

4/3/2025 at 3:50:49 PM

The word is starting to be used by the left in the same way the right uses "woke": It's become watered down and an over-used way to simply say "anything my side doesn't like".

- Climate change is real: "woke"

- Firing people in government: "fascist"

- Compassion and fairness: "woke"

- Cruelty toward political enemies: "fascist"

- Expertise-driven and reason-driven policies: "woke"

- Stacking government positions with loyal cronies: "fascist"

- Rights for women, minorities, gay people, and so on: "woke"

- Handouts to corporations: "fascist"

They've become vague words that mean the same thing: "Politics I don't like"

by ryandrake

4/3/2025 at 4:03:59 PM

This reminds me of the joke about how republicans will defend criminal conspiracy by saying "Wow so it's illegal to make plans with friends now".

by moolcool

4/3/2025 at 3:16:28 PM

In the academic community the term still has a useful meaning and is often used appropriately in those circles.

But you could substitute neoreactionary in GP and it would still be referring to real bloggers that are treated as if they're making legitimate and justifiable arguments.

It's a serious concern, I think it's good to criticize this tendency.

by treyd

4/3/2025 at 3:58:09 PM

You do not have to look very far to find prominent voices on the right who are apologetically anti-democracy.

by moolcool

4/3/2025 at 4:00:35 PM

Or even unapologetically.

by dragonwriter

4/3/2025 at 4:07:43 PM

if what you mean by anti-democracy, is government oppression, then the left and right both use this equally.

there is only one continuum: liberty from government oppression, or lack thereof.

I hope you don't seriously consider the oligopoly of two parties and small circle of connected elites, dependent on financial backing from ultra high net worth oligarchs, corporations, special lobbying groups - a democracy. This is not democracy, it is plutocracy (the power of capital/rich)

by slt2021

4/3/2025 at 4:15:21 PM

There is bad, and there is worse, far worse.

And, it's a kleptocracy, more and more, for a very long time now.

by MrMcCall

4/3/2025 at 5:42:50 PM

US is not a democracy. Trump got like ~77 mln votes, which roughly compares to 23% of the population of 340 mln people. so Trump doesn't even represent the a quarter of US population.

other countries are more democratic, in a sense that winning candidate represents larger share of people living there

by slt2021

4/3/2025 at 3:22:17 PM

Eh, I really do call BS on that.

Umberto Eco's 14 tenants of fascism still stands strong and is highly visible in modern discourse.

by pixl97

4/3/2025 at 4:37:14 PM

*tenets

by cuu508

4/3/2025 at 4:01:37 PM

This is the opposite of a dog whistle it's entirely explicit. There are people being thrown into vans for speech right now. There are law firms that are negotiating to lift bills of attainder for their prior political litigation. They are _literally_ throwing people in El Salvadorean prisons without due process, including people that were in this country legally.

by laidoffamazon

4/3/2025 at 2:23:04 PM

Every rationalist movement eventually ends up at odds with rational people.

by analog31

4/3/2025 at 2:42:56 PM

But then, whom are you dissing? Whom is GP dissing? Because it's really unclear. On the one hand, "rational people" keep their views even as they drift apart from a wider "rationalist movement". On the other hand, it's the rationalist communities - the movement - that's much more likely to actually know something "about the foundations of economics or political science". On the grasping hand, such communities can and do get stuck missing forest for the trees.

But then on the slapping hand, approximately all criticism of rationalism (particularly LessWrong-associated) I've seen on HN and elsewhere, involves either heresay and lies, or just a legion of strawmen like "zomg Roko's basilisk" or GP's own "arguments" like:

> Nobody likes a technocrat, because a technocrat would let a kid who fell down a well die there, since the cost of rescuing them could technically save the lives of 3 others someplace else

It's hard to even address something that's just plain bullshit, so in the end, I'm still leaning towards giving rationalists the benefit of doubt. Strange as some conclusions of some people may sometimes be, they at least try to argue it with reason, and not strawmen and ideological rally cries.

EDIT: and then there's:

> They often re-hash arguments which have been had and settled like 200 years ago

Well, somebody has to. It's important for the same reason reproducibility in science is important.

I'd be wary of assuming any complex argument has been "settled like 200 years ago". When people say this, they just mean "shut up and accept the uninformed, simplistic opinion". In a sense, this is even worse than blindly following religious dogma, as with organized religions, the core dogmas are actually designed by smart people to achieve some purpose (ill-minded or not); cutting people off with "settled like 200 years ago" is just telling them to accept whatever's the cheapest, worst-quality belief currently on sale on the "marketplace of ideas".

by TeMPOraL

4/3/2025 at 3:17:05 PM

Rationalism, and the people who believe in it and promote it, has the problem that the human mind unavoidably decides to act as the arbiter of what is rational or not. This limits your vision to only that which the mind internally 'agrees with' or not, entrenching hidden biases.

Fundamentally, it's the mind only engaging with the cognitive, and ignoring the limbic. Engaging with the limbic, with the deep, primal parts of the brain, challenges cognitively-held truths and demands you to support these truths from a broader context.

This is why rationalists are more prone to engage with fascist viewpoints, they seek more power for their held beliefs and fascism offers that in spades. You're not thinking about the history of fascist movements and how horrible they all turned out. You're thinking: How can we do it better this time?

Just like in math, the rational is a subset of the real, and you need both the rational and the irrational to make reality. Focusing exclusively on rationality is intentionally blinding yourself to messy reality.

by vinceguidry

4/3/2025 at 3:45:43 PM

> Just like in math, the rational is a subset of the real

I just want to highlight this, since it's the cleanest way I've seen this expressed. This is a fantastic hackernews comment.

by moolcool

4/3/2025 at 3:53:08 PM

I too want to highlight this, since it's one of the cleanest case of blatant equivocation sneaking past people.

>> Just like in math, the rational is a subset of the real

That only works if you think Rationality ⊂ Reality the same way ℚ ⊂ ℝ — which is like saying Space-time ⊂ Archery because time flies like an arrow.

Wordplay is not an argument.

by TeMPOraL

4/3/2025 at 4:10:34 PM

And I'd like to highlight this, since it's one of the cleanest cases of everyone in a situation knowing what's being said, and then a rationalist coming along and thinking everyone is misunderstanding it except for him.

Rationalists read poetry like "Compare thee to a summer's day? Pfft, impossible!"

by moolcool

4/3/2025 at 3:46:09 PM

That's an interesting take, but I can't see how you can dismiss rationality/rationalism as insufficient to process reality on the basis of "ignoring the limbic", without dismissing all of science and mathematics in the process.

I do agree there's more to human experience than just the cognitive / "system 2" view, but the important aspect of our cognitive facility - aspects that put humans on top of the global food chain - is that we can model and reason about the "limbic", and even though we can merely approximate it in the cognitive space, we've also learned how to work with approximations and uncertainty.

This is to say, if reason seems to justify viewpoints generally known, viscerally and cognitively, to be abhorrent, it typically means one's reasoning about perfectly spherical cows in a vacuum instead of actual human beings, and fails to include the "deep, primal parts of the brain" in their model. That, fortunately, is a correctable mistake.

Just like in math, if you construct a seemingly solid edifice of theorems and proofs, but forget and subsequently violate a critical assumption, all kind of wild conclusions will come out the other end.

by TeMPOraL

4/3/2025 at 4:40:44 PM

> I can't see how you can dismiss rationality/rationalism as insufficient to process reality on the basis of "ignoring the limbic", without dismissing all of science and mathematics in the process.

Only a rationalist could make such a statement. I tell you rationalism is only a part of reality, not the whole, and you take that as a dismissal of all of the rational. I have no problems with science and maths, I just don't elevate them to the level of prime importance that rationalists do. I watched the Veritasium video on Cantor and the Axiom of Choice before I saw it on HN, and I follow Dr. Angela Collier on YouTube.

I'm an intuitionist, not a rationalist. I believe in a broad and rich informational diet, and that intuitive understanding is better than reductionist, which is the only kind of understanding rationalists seem to value.

> is that we can model and reason about the "limbic",

We can, and the academic domain that produces is generally called the humanities, and the humanities seem to be almost universally dismissed, even despised, by rationalists. So color me unimpressed when rationalists do this acceptance / dismissal dance regarding them. You don't really care about the humanities, just that we can model and reason about them. You want your rational bent to encompass the irrational, when fundamentally it cannot do that. Yes we can study the humanities. Just not with science or math or any other positivistic approach that would satisfy a rationalist.

And I fundamentally disagree with the notion that it's the cognitive that allowed us to dominate. In fact it's the cooperation between the cognitive and the limbic that produces the language that allows us to communicate with each other that gave us the advantage. Without the limbic there's no reason or room to cooperate.

All your viewpoint seeks to do is reduce the real into the rational.

> Just like in math, if you construct a seemingly solid edifice of theorems and proofs, but forget and subsequently violate a critical assumption, all kind of wild conclusions will come out the other end.

Hence Elon Musk's Nazi-esque government takeover.

by vinceguidry

4/3/2025 at 3:41:31 PM

Everyone likes to use fascist to smear their political opponents, yet I'm not seeing a lot of evidence that the "anti-fascists" are any different. They support mass censorship, state propaganda, political violence, forever war, discrimination, debanking, lawfare, lockdowns, and ironically even infringement of bodily autonomy through unconstitutional vaccine mandates.

by exoverito

4/3/2025 at 4:44:09 PM

I hope this "I know you are but what am I" approach to politics falls out of fashion soon. Like listening to children playing cops and robbers.

by vinceguidry

4/3/2025 at 4:14:23 PM

> whom are you dissing? Whom is GP dissing?

Just a nit, it's "who" in this case, not "whom," because it is a subject not an object. "Whom" is more often used as "to/with/for whom."

by satvikpendem

4/3/2025 at 7:00:47 PM

Thanks! English is not my first language, and I still have problem with this particular thing.

(IIRC use of "whom" was never covered in my English classes; I only learned about it from StarGate: SG-1, a show in which one of the main characters had a habit of mocking enemies by correcting their grammar.)

by TeMPOraL

4/3/2025 at 5:34:13 PM

Your entire post is premised on rational people only being rationalists

by freejazz

4/3/2025 at 2:36:21 PM

It always falls down because the end-goal of ones "rationalism" always has to be determined by a set of values.

If you want to form a political ideology based on rationality, your very first step will stick you right in the middle of the sticky-icky world of the humanities. 'Hello deontology, my old friend.'

by moolcool

4/3/2025 at 3:19:34 PM

Isn’t rationalism (as discussed above) more closely related to utilitarianism? Thus rationalism is more of a consequentialist framework than a deontological one?

by bumby

4/3/2025 at 3:40:17 PM

Even definitions there are extremely hazy. "The most good for the most people".

Define "good". Happiness? Economic prosperity? Community? And over what time span?

Define "most". Percentage of people served? Number of people served?

Define "people". Are you counting citizens? Immigrants? Foreigners? Prisoners? People in the future?

You know the joke in the sciences about how everything distills down to mathematics? I would argue that we just as often distill down to philosophy. You have to reckon with a lot of questions which a stats degree can't help you much with.

by moolcool

4/3/2025 at 3:51:21 PM

To steal a quote from The Good Place, “This is why everyone hates moral philosophy professors”

by bumby

4/3/2025 at 3:08:11 PM

Its almost like you’ve discovered content manufactured whose only purpose is propaganda

by Henchman21

4/3/2025 at 3:45:23 PM

What's also remarkable is that these people often have incredible disdain for communities of experts who study these topics for their careers. The number of times that I've seen one of these blogs discuss a topic that they believe they have invented while ignoring the mountains of literature already produced on the topic is... concerning.

This is what no humanities education does to a motherfucker.

by UncleMeat

4/3/2025 at 3:49:13 PM

My favourite genre of this is when the crypto community rediscovers centuries of economic lessons from first-principles.

by moolcool

4/3/2025 at 2:49:11 PM

Those are good questions for sure and could lead to some interesting discussions, but (and maybe my generally left-leaning bias is showing by saying this) they're questions that are in many ways self-evident. For example, it's hard to argue that health care should only be affordable for the rich and that everyone else should just die in the streets.

There's other issues that are much less clear and, in my experience, more likely to shift from discussions and debates into strife and arguments:

- Should private citizens be allowed to own firearms? Should they be allowed to carry them on the streets?

- What do we do about meth and opiates on our streets? What do we do about the associated property and violent interpersonal crime?

- Should we start building more nuclear power plants to cut down on our greenhouse gas emissions?

And locally:

- The city is expanding to the west. What should this neighbourhood look like?

These, I believe, are squarely in the realm of "politics" and unless you're having the discussion in an ideological bubble are likely to be much hotter-button issues.

by tonyarkles

4/3/2025 at 4:46:23 PM

There's a lot of nuance in the healthcare access and affordability issue. In developed countries at least there's a pretty broad consensus that if someone is having a medical emergency then they should receive treatment regardless of ability to pay. But beyond that it gets sticky and there are hard choices that no one likes to discuss. Resources are finite but demand is effectively infinite, so one way or another there has to be some form of rationing. Like if a poor patient is dying of cancer and a drug could extend their life by 3 months at a cost of $100K then should society be obligated to pay? This is inherently a political question with no obvious correct answer.

by nradov

4/3/2025 at 5:30:54 PM

"healthcare should be for everyone" is a great claim to make. but then the question is implementation. how will you get rid of the current system and replace it with a more equitable one? people are generally hesitant to make changes unless things are really bad. i like to think of this in terms of chemical bonds - people are bonded to their current systems, and wont break those bonds unless they are under enough stress that bond breakage is favorable. and once you start arguing for destruction of the current system, the morality gets fuzzy. do you support accelerationism, or a more gradual change? and then once you are in the weeds of implementing a fairer healthcare system, things are just genuinely terrible. i am very uninvolved in the healthcare system, but you need organizational structures, supply chain, etc. someone somewhere will probably try and be selfish about things which will make everything harder. structures will have to be built to deal with legal minutia. and meanwhile there are all these other preexisting systems used to the former system that struggle to make the switch instantaneously? every question is complicated and awful once you think about implementation. nothing is ever self evident. imo!

by nixonaddiction

4/3/2025 at 6:59:45 PM

> "healthcare should be for everyone" is a great claim to make. but then the question is implementation. how will you get rid of the current system and replace it with a more equitable one?

And as importantly, what does "more equitable" or "fairer" mean? More broadly, how do people define "better"?

In the US, a major issue is that The D and The R have radically different ideas of what those words mean, even though they agree on the high level objectives like "healthcare should be for everyone".

by brightlancer

4/3/2025 at 3:57:05 PM

- should private citizens be able to own their own property? Or should the government jump in an take what they think is "fair" so they can redistribute it to others?

by gosub100

4/3/2025 at 5:10:20 PM

Is this a trick question about tax or an ‘are you a communist?’ question?

Outside the extremes edge cases (billionaires), I’d be surprised if any significant portion of the population thought owning stuff a problem.

by lostlogin

4/3/2025 at 6:05:52 PM

> I’d be surprised if any significant portion of the population thought owning stuff a problem.

Except for Real Estate...there's a not-insignificant group of people who thing that the idea of owning multiple homes and renting them out should not be allowed.

by tonyarkles

4/3/2025 at 7:38:08 PM

> The crucial question is what is "politics"? Are personalities politics? No. Are parties? No. Are inflammatory issues about race, sex or gender or political correctness or immigration? No!

I don't personally agree with how quick you are able to write those things off as not being political. Would you mind providing a bit more explanation of how you are able to arrive at such confident No's?

Perhaps you consider political to be an intrinsic quality of a thing rather than a descriptor of how a thing is used/intended? I fall into the latter camp, and thus am very open to consider almost anything and everything political. Much like art.

by klank

4/3/2025 at 1:59:48 PM

> Are common American citizens able to afford and obtain reasonable health care?

"Should common American citizens" ... is a question.

This already implies a country's citizens having access to health care without financial barriers is a good idea already :)

[Note that I'm in the EU, I have access to affordable health care by default and I like it that way. But I don't think everyone in the US thinks like that. Or even understands what it means.]

by nottorp

4/3/2025 at 6:16:24 PM

Agree.

It is same thing with higher ed. Everyone should have college degree . Now even without everyone having it but just 3-4 times then before means there are tons of graduates without jobs, low paying jobs commensurate to years in education and heavy load of debt.

The question from start had to be Should everyone get a college degree?

Define all kinds of privilege/benefits as rights. And then move on to ask innocent questions as Is even asking for our rights politics?

by geodel

4/3/2025 at 6:42:56 PM

Uh oh. Last paragraph is leading :)

by nottorp

4/3/2025 at 3:00:36 PM

"Should common American citizens" ... is a question

"How should..." is the really important and interesting question. Even when everybody answers yes, which most people do, to the "should" question they will often completely disagree on the "how should" question.

by dagw

4/3/2025 at 7:44:06 PM

Literally none of this is politics, its governance. Politics is the human word for the chimplike "who gets to be the boss" games we play. No matter how well your society is running there will always be politics, put 20 people on a tropical island with no problems and 4 weeks later half of em will want to kill the other half - thats politics

by bad_haircut72

4/3/2025 at 2:32:52 PM

> The crucial question is what is "politics"? Are personalities politics? No. Are parties? No. Are inflammatory issues about race, sex or gender or political correctness or immigration? No!

What an easy answer when you not part of the disadvantaged demographic. Some problems apply almost exclusively to a single demographic. Not asking the cultural questions is like thinking that segregation was perfectly okay because everyone had access to everything you'd need. Just not in the small space.

Urban problems are not rural problems even when they look like the same problem. Why there is a food desert in Nowhere, SomeState is not going to be anything like the reason there is a good desert in Urbanville, Somestate. So while everyone definitely deserves the ability to acquire food pretending that subgroups don't exist means you can't actually solve their struggle. If you apply a blanket solution it doesn't help everyone.

It is beyond disingenuous to pretend that different kinds of people don't feel the impact of culture and regulation differently and in ways they either can't themselves or can't at all change. To take that stance, shows that one is on the default demographic that is always considered before anyone else.

by iteria

4/3/2025 at 4:15:58 PM

> It is beyond disingenuous to pretend that different kinds of people don't feel the impact of culture and regulation differently

But that is why you shouldn't talk about it at parties, because people experience it so differently it is likely to lead to conflict and bad times.

Saying you need to talk about it since it is important is like teaching math at parties because it is important, it will just irritate people since they are there to enjoy themselves not get lectured.

by Jensson

4/3/2025 at 7:41:30 PM

Unlike your math example, if serious harm or death is at stake, I don't mind if it leads to conflict and bad times. Avoidance because "it might be a bad time", to me, feels like a lack of appreciation for what is at stake in these conversations.

by klank

4/3/2025 at 8:26:18 PM

Great post, I agree with all your points regarding what is politics except that a functioning democracy should rely on common people, I think it should rely on the valuable people.

Common man democracy just lowers the decision making process to majority of idiots of the country that are easily manipulated. Worse yet, in its current form, it essentially causes the flip flopping mess because of the lack of long term vision and focus, something the common man doesn't want to deal with.

One man one vote in general makes no sense either. Why should a homeless or fresh immigrant's vote have the same impact as someone that has lived and paid taxes in a country for decades? How about...you get a vote weight equal to the amount of investment/taxes you have made in that country over the course of your life. Provide more for the community, have more to lose, get more say on policy.

Give incentive to the society value providers to remain and society detractors to leave.

Add to this that the current Democracy system is fundamentally flawed, most of those systems are exploitable anyway, it makes zero sense to change things up when a great leader is doing well. Having an arbitrary rule that they must step down because they can only serve for x time makes no sense. If it ain't broke don't fix it. Same goes the other way, where bad leaders can remain in power using war mechanisms.

The core problems today with society is not the left right or whatever, it's that people are lazy, selfish, manipulative, different, it's hard to find a system that works that can make everyone happy.

Are you willing to risk personal death or decrease your value for the greater good of the nation as a leader or citizen? That's the standard that all citizens and especially politicians should be held to. There are examples of this in the past, usually when a revolution happens. One might say it's happening in the US right now.

For certain one solution would be to remove people as much as possible from the equation, remove all incentive to abuse the system. The dictatorship and laws of a country should provide negative motivation for someone to cheat and should reward people providing value to society.

It's not easy, no matter how well a system is designed, people will find a way to cheat it, Bitcoin is a great example of this, not accounting for the banking industry buying the ecosystem and shitcoins diluting the entire system.

AI is not there yet, I don't think it ever could be, it's been trained on existing flawed ideas which have been further gimped in the interest of 'security'. It has no original thought, can't even draw a full glass of wine.

by zepolen

4/3/2025 at 4:47:38 PM

>A functioning democracy requires that the common people are able to use the law and courts to right wrongs. Are the common people able to use/afford access to the courts when wrongs are committed.

Having recently been completely railroaded and betrayed by the court system I can tell you. No. I literally had all my evidence thrown out with no explanation from the Judge other than "I don't think this is relevant" in regards to several different topics that I had made an organized report on. Meanwhile the corporate defense provided unorganized meaningless piles of documentation that would takes months to go over and it was left as "evidence" I do mean meaningless, several hundred pages were literally blank white pages submitted as evidence. I guess the crappy software they use to do discovery generated lots of white space in between snippits of info.

The court had decided before the trial that by default a person is wrong and a corporation is right.

by citizenpaul

4/3/2025 at 3:44:13 PM

Politics is decision making in groups.

Every group of people is a political unit and anything that affects decision making is political. Your office is a political unit, your family is a political unit, etc.

So if a racial issue is affecting the decisions we make then yes it’s political.

by CooCooCaCha

4/3/2025 at 8:12:34 PM

The problem is the property political class, which includes both parties a-la Gore Vidal, seeks to dismiss, gaslight, and distract from these problems and instead make them pseudo-wedge issues or political footballs. One side is stuck on remaking reality as a shared, fantastical mirage, and the other complains about the delusion with stern words but agrees to it anyhow. Neither is concerned with addressing the core problem: big money buying all 3 branches of govt, and John McCain found that out the hard way that ethics don't win votes because enough Americans' manufactured consent to condone lawlessness, authoritarianism, radical deregulation, and privatization.

Either a Constitutional Convention 2.0 needs to happen to undo the damage like the repeal of the Tillman Act and the disastrous Citizens' United, or Americans needs to voluntarily do away with popularity contests by instead picking public administrators with limited power by sortition from amongst professional societies for a limited term of say 4 years once.

by anon6362

4/3/2025 at 2:43:24 PM

> The crucial question is what is "politics"? … Are inflammatory issues about race, sex or gender or political correctness or immigration? No!

When people talk about privilege, this is it - being able to dictate which issues are ‘politics,’ and being able to dismiss my rights as ‘not politics.’

Do I have a right to work? To live? To own property? To marry the one I love? To have sex with the people I’m attracted to? To raise a child with my partner? To choose my own identity and to live my own life?

A white cishet man takes all those rights for granted - why shouldn’t I? Why should my struggle to obtain those same rights be dismissed as ‘inflammatory issues about sex or gender or political correctness’ and therefore ‘not politics?’

Are you married? Would you like to be? Do you ever worry about how you’ll be treated when you go to work, or make a purchase at the store? What’s it like to go grocery shopping, or car shopping, or touring places to live? What’s it like apply to and interview for jobs? Does you boss look like you? How do your parents feel about you? How do your neighbors greet you when they see you? What’s your relationship like with your landlord?

You’re really telling me that none of that is worth ‘politicking’ over?

that attitude is exactly why things are not going well right now - because we are pretending that of we look away, equality and justice will take care of itself.

by mock-possum

4/3/2025 at 3:44:53 PM

“What is politics” is entirely contextual.

I start talking about my wife’s work. That’s just personal family stuff, right? Not if there’s someone there who’s a hardcore women-should-stay-home sort.

Or maybe everyone is ok with women having jobs, but my wife’s work has been substantially impacted by the recent DOGE nonsense. Something as simple as “she has to go to the office on Monday” becomes political if there’s a Trump supporter present.

Let’s just talk shit about our cars. Oops, what brand of car you own is now political.

“My parents are going to come visit” sorry, turns out that the ability of foreigners to enter the country without fear of being detained for weeks for no good reason is political.

by wat10000

4/3/2025 at 5:29:33 PM

[dead]

by Slava_Propanei

4/3/2025 at 8:41:29 PM

There are a lot of questions that are upstream of yours. Or at least, that illustrate why your questions are aggressively framed in a specific ideological directions and it's possible to frame them in the other direction.

If common American citizens can't afford health care, do other American citizens have an obligation to provide it? There is a word for a system where people are obligated to provide their labor to others. Does that word apply to a system where everyone gets free healthcare?

Do common Americans provide enough value to earn the wages they make now, especially the ones making a legislatively mandated minimum wage? How many fewer can actually earn an arbitrary increased number? Do people deserve things they didn't earn? What's the non-mystical explanation for that, if so?

Why aren't we having children? They can't have a productive life without having a life.

Is the difference between earnings and expenditures growing larger because Americans are unwilling to pay one another? If we are, why is that? (Actually I'll cheat a little on this one and provide a correct answer: the entire increased gap here is explained by housing. So the questions becomes: why aren't Americans willing to let strangers live closer to them? Might there be some risk or self-interest there? Are people obligated to act against their interests? Why, how, and by whom are they obligated?)

Which is better, democracy or a stable and prosperous society? Might they be mutually exclusive? What's holy about the popular vote, especially for morons? Even if we keep democracy, does a functional democracy require some form of IQ tests as a condition of the franchise?

Is the purpose of courts to write wrongs or interpret the law? Does separation of powers require courts to refrain from writing wrongs if the legislature has passed laws that are wrong? If not, does the lack of separation of powers place any limit at all on the courts' ability to right wrongs? How about when the courts are controlled by people whose concept of wrong is different than yours? Doesn't a functioning democracy require the concept of right and wrong to be decided by what are literally called the political branches, the legislative and executive?

Are the news media obligated to produce content in the interests of the people? Are you then obligated to produce content in the interests of the people? What's the difference between you writing in a public forum and a journalist? If there is a difference, should you therefore not enjoy freedom of the press? What if you, say, advocate for the courts to ignore separation of powers to do what is right? What if we the people decide that is not in our interests? How will you be punished for this transgression?

In actuality, I would probably give the same answers to many of these questions that you would. But the point is that there is no "just asking questions, man". Questions have premises and assumptions. If you, like me, don't like the ones in this question set, don't assume people will be comfortable if you're just askin' yours. I wouldn't be. And if people are all comfortable with you just askin' yours, ask yourself whether you have friends or conformation bias with echo chamber.

by 0xBDB

4/3/2025 at 2:54:37 PM

“Hello friend, thanks so much for coming over. I just wanted to start by asking you what do you think are the preconditions for having a functioning democracy”

by grandempire

4/3/2025 at 2:44:18 PM

Politics is simply figuring out who’s on your team. It’s why our current billionaires are so big on immigration and divisive rhetoric. Small groups have used this tactic for thousands of years to rule over larger groups.

In a good society you would know and have a favorable view of our wealthiest (kings in all but name) people. They wouldn’t be afraid and hide their wealth (Bezos, musk, etc are not the top) because there wouldn’t be an immoral wealth gap.

by ajsicnckckxnx

4/3/2025 at 4:24:29 PM

On top of that if you strictly want avoid political topics, be aware that there are forces who profit from making topics "political" that probably shouldn't be.

So when someone else decides which topics are politicized and you want to avoid political discussions — congrats you just let others decide about which topics you are willing to discuss.

My opinion is that most topics have a political dimension anyways, also because most topics have a economic dimension. Or phrased differently: Everything is political.

When discussing politics with friends the "how" is probably much more important than the "if". Most people do not have a vetted political opinion, they just have a strong vibe that they can't really reason about. They aligned with some sources and read/watch news they like to hear and that forms their image of the world. They never really tried to form a logically coherent worldview that is backed by facts instead of pre-filtered annecdotes that may or may not have happened in that way.

With this as the starting point a healthy political discourse isn't possible. You can't argue against someones vibes.

But that doesn't mean good/interesting political discourse isn't possible. It just means that if someone lets the politicians turn them into a vibe-based party-before-issue follower that uncritically believes most of what politicians say, they can no longer think or discuss the topics that impact them with others on a reasonable level. And this is why topics get politicized in the first way.

And no-one is immune to this, especially not you guys over there with that two-party system. But we all need to remember that towing the line of a political party means they no longer represent us, but we represent them. Mental flexibility translates to voter agency and our democracies hinge on voters being well informed and not throwing their agency away.

TL;DR: Not discussing politics and blindly towing the party line is like throwing your own agency away.

by atoav

4/3/2025 at 5:20:31 PM

[dead]

by Slava_Propanei

4/3/2025 at 4:12:33 PM

[flagged]

by moate

4/3/2025 at 7:32:46 AM

(Article starts off be asserting that they don't talk politics with friends then proceeds to describe how to talk politics with friends?)

Friends are people you should support and build up. You shouldn't try to make them feel bad by winning arguments with them. That said- a healthy society is only possible if individuals can exchange ideas about how to run things and then act collectively (aka "politics"). Sometimes people will have different interests and priorities, that lead to them having different ideas about stuff- most of the time this is totally fine.

This basically comes down to respect and communication skills- but for god's sake people- keep on talking about "politics"!

by fergie

4/3/2025 at 7:58:30 AM

yep the purpose of the essay was to:

1) show the situations in which politics can't be discussed productively (dogmatic ideologies)

2) show how to avoid being dogmatic yourself

I absolutely encourage people to discuss politics productively

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 11:35:27 AM

For me, "avoid being dogmatic yourself" is failing to bring home one very important point to avoid being dogmatic: understand that you are equally susceptible from the mistakes/misunderstandings that you blame others for.

An example in this article is the following part

> my angle ... becomes that of opposing their tribalism. Unfortunately ... most people just view me as the opposite of their own tribe

But this part totally fails self-reflection: it talks about your "conservative friends" and your "liberal friends". They are labelled "conservative" or "liberal". How does the author know that the interlocutor did not act exactly like the author: the interlocutor brought a subject, from their point of view their position on it where pretty neutral and sensible, the author reacts by playing the devil's advocate. They therefore see the author as the "conservative" or "liberal" person, and if they follow the author's strategy, they will play the devil's advocate. And then, THE AUTHOR fails to realize they don't actually care about the conclusion.

The lazy answer is: I'm smarter than them, I can tell when it's the case or not. Or: the subject I bring are not political, they are just common sense and sensible position, but they sometimes bring something I disagree with, and this is not common sense and sensible position.

In both case, it's weak and does not acknowledge the possibilities that you may have done the same mistakes as them from time to time (either classifying a "moderate" as "far" just because they were doing the devil's advocate, or presenting opinions that are not "trivially moderate" from the eyes of your interlocutor). It's a detail, but because of that, I'm not sure the author is as "non dogmatic" as they think they are: they are saying what everybody is saying. The large majority of people don't say "I'm dogmatic and my opinions are crazy" (if they believe their opinions are crazy, then it means they don't believe in their opinions and it is not really their opinions).

by cauch

4/3/2025 at 12:18:45 PM

Absolutely. While I am a person who would avoid politics in most contexts myself, I couldn't help but feel uncomfortable with this attitude in this write up.

If you see others as being "insufficiently equipped" to handle nuance, "because it's hard" or "because they are too resistant" is a judgement I prefer not to pass on others.

> "Because if a desire to seek truth isn't there"

Who defines the truth? As much as I understand there is a need to draw a line somewhere, I also believe that everyone has a right to their truth. And that's my truth. I let everyone have their perspective and don't see a need to impose mine or look down upon them if they don't agree to mine, this included :)

by InfinityByTen

4/3/2025 at 1:14:15 PM

People are entitled to their perspective of course, but it is a hindrance to discussion when people conflate their perspective with truth.

by dfxm12

4/3/2025 at 2:19:02 PM

I think of truth like π. Some people say its 3, others 3.14, others 3.1415

There is a trade off between energy expended vs accuracy needed vs accurately communicating, but the de-referenced concept is not a matter of human perspective. Coordinating truth is why we have standards and protocols to build on.

by decompiled_dev

4/3/2025 at 12:50:08 PM

If everyone has their own truth, then how could you know that to be the case? You'd have to appeal to something outside of "your truth" to make that judgement. Meaning, if it were even possible (or coherent) for there to be such a thing as "your truth", then you couldn't know it to be the case. It simply would be "the truth" as far as you are concerned. You can't step outside yourself. There is no "objective POV".

These sorts of claims are as incoherent as the equally intellectually jejune skeptical positions ("there is no truth" or "we cannot know the truth" or variations thereof). It's rare to see anyone outside of first year philosophy students make them.

Why can't you just say we have disagreements about what the truth is?

by lo_zamoyski

4/3/2025 at 5:06:17 PM

this is actually in the footnotes and addressed by the "thinking in bets" section

"[9] Fully understanding I can be the one in the wrong -- however, when this is the case, the person explaining is usually able to:

understand my argument convey their disagreement in good faith without circular reasoning or rhetorical tricks"

"There's a 40% chance this succeeds because of A, 25% chance of B, 10% of X, and 5% something we haven't thought of"

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 7:14:36 PM

The footnote is basically saying "I can tell when it's the case or not", which is in fact exactly my problem. That is not the answer that I'm expecting from someone who has self-reflection.

For example: "understand my argument" is assuming that the argument is obviously correct. When someone presents to you an incorrect argument, 1) this person thinks the argument is correct (otherwise they will not present that argument), 2) you will not answer by saying "I've understood", you will argue. From their point of view, you are the one failing to understand. Now the question is: how many time this person was you? How many time you presented a bad argument and then blamed the interlocutor for "not understanding" when they don't accept a faulty argument?

Same with "circular reasoning or rhetorical trick": when I disagree, it is always very easy to convince myself that there is a problem in the interlocutor logic. Especially if I failed to understand or misunderstood the argument. I would even say that for all discussions that are not trivial, there are always elements that can be seen as circular or rhetorical trick.

by cauch

4/3/2025 at 3:50:57 PM

I’m having a real hard time with this one lately.

The major mistake/misunderstanding I see now is thinking that a stupid, vindictive asshole who failed upwards would be a good person to run the country.

I don’t think I’m susceptible to that. I’ve never viewed anyone the way a lot of these people view Donald Trump. I can’t imagine I ever will. Is it a failure of imagination or is something really different between us?

by wat10000

4/3/2025 at 7:37:57 PM

Trump may be a bad leader but he'd still be just one type of bad leader. I'm not trying to fully relativize Trump either, they're not all equally bad.

I agree with Slavoj Zizek's take on Trump's appeal and why a lot of criticism of him seems to either have no effect or increases his fan appeal: As a general rule, people relate to others by identifying with their weaknesses, not only or not even primarily with their strengths. You aren't susceptible to his appeal because you're of a different class or background which has different sets of strengths/weaknesses which make it hard for you to relate to Trump.

The weaknesses Trump has - his stubborn ignorance, his impulsiveness, his might-makes-right mentality and disdain for rules, his vindictiveness - are deeply shared with his fans. They will forgive his sins because it is their sins too. For example when Trump is attacked for an impulsive comment, they relate to the risk that they could also be cancelled for some comment that is seen as racist or sexist or something. His policy framework is made of the kind of simple ideas you'll find in a pub, I once heard Trump described as "the average guy from Queens" and it made a lot of sense to me. "Nobody knew healthcare was so complicated", "We're going to build a wall".

I belong more to a white collar, professional class. I probably have a blindspot on the weaknesses and sins more endemic to my group, ones that I share with the figures I find appealing. If I had to guess I'd say it's something like an ideological/theoretical zeal, bureaucratic dysfunction, and an exclusionary judginess. When a politician unveils some theoretically elegant project and it largely fails and runs over budget and gets mired in bureaucratic hell, I'm maybe too quick to forgive that as it's a relatable sin.

by themacguffinman

4/3/2025 at 10:39:35 PM

It is a problem that so many people thinks that a presidential election is to vote for the guy they relate to and not a competent manager. I guess they are so used to vote for the prom king and the reality tv show candidate that they don't realise that the point is not to vote for the person they like.

Similarly, it is worrisome that people vote for what will profit the most for them instead of what is the more just and fair (sometimes even voting against your own profit). It leads to stupid situations, for example where idiots are for protectionist measures whatever the consequences on other countries, but at the same time are angry when people in another country are voting for protectionist measures that affect theirs negatively. It is quite clear with the Trump supporter: they are furious if someone else treats them like they treat others, and seems to not even realise the absurdity.

It is really hard to live in a society with people like that: it just creates lose-lose situations for everyone.

by cauch

4/3/2025 at 8:10:37 PM

In short, people like the dumb jerk because they are also dumb jerks? I can't say I disagree, but I don't think that's what cauch's comment was going for.

by wat10000

4/3/2025 at 12:08:10 PM

I find the most productive political discussions are about history. Most people don’t know any history at all, so a willingness to discuss the reason we have the Third Amendment, or the lasting effects of King Leopold’s dominion in Africa, or the Peleponnesian War, makes for a good discussion, and the distance makes people less emotionally tied to their positions and more willing to accept nuance. If we find we disagree, this also gives us social cover to pretend the topic isn’t intensely relevant to the present day.

by sevensor

4/3/2025 at 12:23:54 PM

Maybe the long peace within the US changed things, but in most countries and especially in Europe discussing history in a room with more than 2 nationalities is a good recipe to sow dissent.

by niemandhier

4/3/2025 at 12:39:02 PM

Good point. I live in the US and I wouldn’t start with the American civil war. Talk about other people’s history. I’ll trade you the American Civil War for the Franco Prussian War.

by sevensor

4/3/2025 at 1:42:58 PM

The American Civil War is a great place to start. You can very quickly assess where somebody’s head is at and move on quickly.

by Spooky23

4/3/2025 at 3:03:05 PM

That depends on what your purpose is having a conversation is in the first place

by s1artibartfast

4/3/2025 at 4:28:43 PM

I mean it is a good filter to understand someone with. When I moved from the midwest to the south as a teenager and learned there are still plenty of people that were unhappy the south lost the civil war and want to remedy that you begin to understand there are some people that are deeply entrenched in their views and you have to make a judgement on how much time you're going to spend dealing with that.

by pixl97

4/3/2025 at 5:24:46 PM

I think entrenchment is a description of both sides, has neither I really willing to budge. I think the critical I think the critical criteria is how much you have to deal with it at all. Is it an interesting conversation that you can have once in awhile, or something that gets inserted into every conversation.

I think the civil war is interesting and nuanced topic to interrogate once in awhile, and can usually find some points of agreement with most people.

The legal, moral, and philosophical questions around it are fascinating. For example, how do you reconcile people's right to self-determination with a desire to carry out abhorrent actions. Historically speaking, the civil war and failures of reconstruction are probably the single most defining aspect of modern American political life.

by s1artibartfast

4/3/2025 at 7:22:38 PM

> learned there are still plenty of people that were unhappy the south lost the civil war and want to remedy that

Did you peel that back to the next layer? Did they want to reintroduce slavery? Or did they want independence from a distant government?

I knew folks in the South who thought some of the craziest racist things and probably would've been OK with slavery (I did hear them promote segregation).

At the same time, the vast majority folks I knew who defended the Civil War or wanted secession didn't want slavery or segregation, but local (and often less) government. Did they misunderstand the role of slavery in the Southern secession? Usually. Does that change their _current intent_? No.

The latter group (which was much larger) should be engaged with on the issue of local government and secession, especially in the context of folks in Blue States who've been rattling about secession under Trump.

by brightlancer

4/3/2025 at 11:13:22 PM

The particular problem with class 1 ( want independence from a distant government ) is to gain enough political power to effect change is they necessarily incorporate class 2 ( want to reintroduce slavery ), this necessitates the use of POSIWID

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_purpose_of_a_system_is_wha...

Unfortunately I don't think the group of 'just want to secede' is "much larger" than those willing to commit civil rights violations after years of practical experience living in the south. The people saying it in the context of the blue states doing it mostly realize it won't work, and the amount of civil rights violations either way skyrocket in the process.

by pixl97

4/3/2025 at 12:11:19 PM

Also, present day politics is in many cases determined by history.

by DeathArrow

4/3/2025 at 12:23:30 PM

Exactly! What makes history relevant is that we are still living in it.

by sevensor

4/3/2025 at 1:52:54 PM

Some of the best convos I've had are with ideologues, it just requires authentic empathy and effort, which means letting go of moral presuppositions and being willing to really listen to them without injecting your own judgments & opinions. If people subconsciously think you're trying to do that, it'll trigger their defense mechanisms and the convo will instantly shut down (or devolve into chaos).

People love to talk about what they think is important, but NOT when they think they're being setup or playing into someone else's hand.

by cle

4/3/2025 at 9:06:49 AM

Not the best title if that’s your message

by elliotec

4/3/2025 at 10:02:45 AM

Well, I know a lot of people in the US who simply don't want to discuss politics at social events these days.

by ghaff

4/3/2025 at 10:37:55 AM

Which means the only input they get is ever polarised extreme feeds online, from social media algorithms and straight up paid adverts.

by ta1243

4/3/2025 at 10:40:40 AM

No, it can also mean they get too much extreme input from the people in reality.

There are lot's of people who won't stop, when you push the wrong button (speaking a wrong word).

by lukan

4/3/2025 at 10:43:19 AM

People tend to moderate themselves and compromise a lot more in real conversations.

It's like all those videos of dogs barking angrily at each other through a closed gate, then suddenly becoming quiet and peaceful, their whole body language changing, when the gate is opened.

by HPsquared

4/3/2025 at 11:42:47 AM

For sure people are more restrained in real life, than online, but the consequences can also be more severe if extreme positions meet offline.

by lukan

4/3/2025 at 12:57:55 PM

I really don’t care. And honestly people I’ll tend to be socializing with are at least somewhat similar in political opinions. Just not interested in discussing political outrages at a social gathering.

If you insist on talking politics when the host or other guests don’t want to you’re a rude idiot.

by ghaff

4/3/2025 at 1:18:37 PM

Your country really needs more political parties.

by spiderfarmer

4/3/2025 at 11:05:31 AM

Better than ruining real life relationships over politics. The only important impact most people have over politics is when they vote. Discussing politics has massive downsides and trivial benefits.

by barry-cotter

4/3/2025 at 12:09:58 PM

There might be very little alignment of political opinions within one's circle of friends, and any discussion would turn into an unpleasant discussion with the risk of ending the group of friends forever.

For most people, very few friendships form with an expectation of political agreement: activists met at a common protest or campaign, generic regulars of a popular political party or union, old style secret societies, and so on.

by HelloNurse

4/3/2025 at 1:40:13 PM

I think people can aim to meet politically aligned people at non-political events/places. I met most of my friends in venues that "members of the opposite tribe" just don't frequent. And I feel like it goes for both sides.

by frantathefranta

4/3/2025 at 2:47:44 PM

Yeah. There are exceptions. People can also have multiple circles. And it's not as if political opinions within a group are really uniform. But there does tend to be a certain degree of uniformity within many groups of friends.

by ghaff

4/3/2025 at 4:31:55 PM

Are you speaking from experience when you say discussing politics has massive downsides for your real life relationships? And if so, may I ask what happened?

by pharrington

4/3/2025 at 10:39:54 AM

that's always been the case, politics and religion are taboo

by dudefeliciano

4/3/2025 at 4:44:02 PM

Of course they are, people get angry when they have to rationalize why they want to genocide some group of people different from them in mixed company.

by pixl97

4/3/2025 at 8:06:29 AM

It was a good essay- thanks for writing it :)

by fergie

4/3/2025 at 12:09:53 PM

I've sent you a line on LinkedIn.

by DeathArrow

4/3/2025 at 7:12:06 PM

What is the point of discussing politics? (not rhetorical). What physical changes in the world do you expect afterwards? You won't undo indoctrination. It just upsets people.

by d0mine

4/3/2025 at 7:49:46 PM

You can’t talk politics without first overcoming tribalism, so I suggest you start there, since in the US that is sadly the state of things.

If you start by talking about which sports team is better you will also cause these reactions. But politics should not be sports. It’s harmless to support a sports team that makes bad choices. Politics has real impact on people’s lives. It’s important to have exit criteria for alignments and affiliations with groups, to the extent they’re necessary.

> What physical changes in the world do you expect afterwards?

Just like voting, it has no effect in the small. You discuss to form and exchange opinions and ideas that become part of the whole. The benefits are in the aggregates. Thus it’s important that it has some other incentive. Where I’m from it’s not very tribalist, so we get the pleasure from thinking and discussing problems even without having an expectation that it will change policy. That wouldn’t work in the US outside very specific groups that understand the rules of engagement and the point of the game. But the discussions themselves are similar in vibe to board games or puzzles, that it’s somewhat fun even though it’s entirely useless (in the small).

by klabb3

4/3/2025 at 7:54:14 AM

This gets more complicated when you replace "friend" with "spouse" (/partner) because there comes up the problem of consensuality in unavoidably unpleasant unavoidable decision-making..

(Assuming one marries for "love")

by gsf_emergency_2

4/3/2025 at 9:04:08 AM

I believe having a partner with directly opposing political views is unsustainable. Partners with adjacent political views may be manageable, or even preferable to a fully aligned one, but those with directly opposing views are a constant source of drama and tension in your life. Political views often reflect deeply held values and beliefs.

by galfarragem

4/3/2025 at 10:35:50 AM

Political views can change over time though. It can be unsustainable in the way of "one or both people moderates their political views".

by HPsquared

4/3/2025 at 4:20:18 PM

That will leave a large group of people without any partners, since men and women vote very differently.

by Jensson

4/3/2025 at 4:32:31 PM

Then so be it, if your views keep you from finding a partner then maybe you should start thinking about compromise rather than falling deeper into extremism.

But, this is also why one political party in the US tends to vote against things like no fault divorce and other questionable policies regarding womens rights.

by pixl97

4/3/2025 at 11:40:12 AM

>> those with directly opposing views are a constant source of drama and tension in your life

I don't think this is true at all. The vast majority of people largely ignore politics, cast their vote, and move on with their lives. It's completely fine to have different political views if you both act like normal reasonable people. We see a lot of the 'kick, scream, and cry' types on both side in the media. In the real world, most people have more important things to be getting on with.

by basisword

4/3/2025 at 11:48:32 AM

> It's completely fine to have different political views if you both act like normal reasonable people.

Yes, this is true, you can have different political views and still be friends/lovers/partners/whatver.

What parent said though was "directly opposing political views", which I'd also agree with is inviting trouble, as it'll leak out in constant tensions and frictions. Simple things like "We shouldn't drive as much as we currently do" can lead to heavy argumentation if the underlying reasoning cannot be understood by both parties.

In real life, people might not speak about parties or political figures, but their everyday actions are driven by their values and beliefs, which also ends up reflected by who they vote for. Politics is everywhere, even where people don't speak of it directly.

by diggan

4/3/2025 at 12:20:45 PM

>> We shouldn't drive as much as we can do

I wouldn't consider this a political view. It's a lifestyle choice based on personal beliefs. Two people can be fully behind the idea we need to do something about climate change and have different ideas on how that should be done. And I think that's part of the problem in recent times - instead of politics being about the big ideas and how a country is run it's become about small personal choices. If a person has heavy arguments with a partner about how much/little they drive I would say they've got an issue with a need to control others, rather than just a strong political opinion.

by basisword

4/3/2025 at 12:49:09 PM

> Two people can be fully behind the idea we need to do something about climate change and have different ideas on how that should be done

I'm not sure if you purposefully ignore what I wrote directly after what you quoted, "if the underlying reasoning cannot be understood by both parties". If a partner would discuss things like this in real life, I'd say this partner might have an issue with discussing in good faith with others.

My point was that it'll lead to friction if you disagree about what "big ideas" are worthwhile to try to implement or not.

by diggan

4/3/2025 at 9:46:43 AM

Note that various surveys report young women and young men diverging a lot more politically. Partly because women's rights have become so politicised.

by pjc50

4/3/2025 at 4:48:30 PM

>Partly because women's rights have become so politicised.

What is the womans suffrage movement?

I may be extrapolating on a single statement too far, but I do feel that you are missing a huge chunk of history regarding all the rights women (at least regarding the US) did not have.

Womans rights have been political for the last 200 years if not longer.

by pixl97

4/3/2025 at 10:04:18 AM

This trend is certainly one aspect of the explanation for the decline in the number of long-term relationships.

by galfarragem

4/3/2025 at 12:36:32 PM

The other being that once women have largescale representation in the workforce, can open bank accounts and credit cards on their own, and can support themselves financially, one of the key pressures to marry is removed. Once there was no fault divorce and women did not need to prove why they needed to divorce, one of the key pressures to stay married is removed.

by 542354234235

4/3/2025 at 4:21:44 PM

That happened a long time ago though, much much longer ago than the number of relationships started to drop, so its unrelated.

by Jensson

4/3/2025 at 1:41:27 PM

Perhaps important, republicans from state lawmakers up to the VP are interested in repealing no fault divorce laws.

by dfxm12

4/3/2025 at 4:05:48 PM

And that's just what they'll openly admit to! Rest assured, they would absolutely not stop at no-fault divorce. They would undo all of the progress you mentioned, and likely more.

by ryandrake

4/3/2025 at 3:56:40 PM

As the gender gap in voting patterns widens, denying rights to women goes from not only being an ideological project of the right but a political project as well. "We will win more elections if women have less social power" is not a good situation to be in.

by UncleMeat

4/3/2025 at 2:52:06 PM

I am the opposite of surprised. How else are terrible, low-quality men going to trap women into a life of unpaid home labor if they can control their own finances, reproduction, and choice to enter or leave a marriage.

by 542354234235

4/3/2025 at 10:39:25 AM

It could also be the opposite causality. Because people aren't getting into intimate relationships as much (looking out for each other, caring deeply about an individual of the opposite gender), the two groups are naturally diverging into preferring "what's best for ME".

I think the political split between genders is MUCH stronger for singles. It's kind of a trap actually.

by HPsquared

4/3/2025 at 12:13:14 PM

Also white/black, straight/gay, poor/wealthy etc.

We can find hundreds of dividing lines if we insist.

by DeathArrow

4/3/2025 at 11:08:06 AM

What do you mean by women’s rights? The difference in support for abortion by sex is trivial. https://www.pewresearch.org/religion/fact-sheet/public-opini...

by barry-cotter

4/3/2025 at 3:50:36 PM

Probably not abortion. While rights never happen in a vacuum, it is usually framed as a matter of fetus rights.

How about a woman's right to equal employment opportunity? 67% of women are in favour of DEI, while most men (57%) take the opposing view. https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/politics-news/poll-american...

The primary political parties are definitely catering to those sides.

by 9rx

4/3/2025 at 3:26:00 PM

Seeing a 3 point difference in the support for abortion between men and women is *wild* to me.

by wing-_-nuts

4/3/2025 at 4:09:27 PM

Rest assured: Those 33% of women who say abortion should be "Illegal in all/most cases," would instantly carve out an exception for themselves if their own lives or livelihoods were in jeopardy from a pregnancy.

by ryandrake

4/3/2025 at 12:59:48 PM

Ah yes, one sex is diverging to the other side because they are wrong on MY pet issue. (This is not grounded in reality)

by tekla

4/3/2025 at 2:47:23 PM

> Partly because women's rights have become so politicised.

That's a hand-wavy way of saying that a core pillar of one of your parties is to take away the rights of an entire gender.

Imagine describing 1940s Germany and saying "Ethnicity has become so politicized these days. I'm just interested in nationalizing the auto industry"

by moolcool

4/3/2025 at 3:48:00 PM

That would only be true if words weren't perverted for political leverage. Sexist used to mean "women can't do that" now sexist means "a woman experienced an unpleasant thing, and it carries more significance because of her gender, and if you dare dispute this you can expect to be cancelled".

by gosub100

4/3/2025 at 4:01:00 PM

How about “women can’t get certain medical procedures”? Or “women can’t vote”? Multiple prominent Republicans have floated reducing or eliminating women’s right to vote.

by wat10000

4/3/2025 at 3:51:01 PM

I don't know if you're a news buff, but they're actually actively saying "women can't do that".

by moolcool

4/3/2025 at 4:24:07 PM

That doesn't contradict what he said though, he didn't say the old sexists are no longer called sexist, he said the definition had expanded to cover many more than before.

by Jensson

4/3/2025 at 4:40:59 PM

Why even say it then? What's the point of countering "Well, the definition has expanded so much", when the thing you're talking about conforms to the old definition?

by moolcool

4/3/2025 at 10:55:21 PM

I said it because it's a dirty trick used by one side to make people think there's a crisis. When are you going to declare the problem solved? When every single living breathing human being conforms to your world view? Your argument is that someone, somewhere, said something terrible. Why even say it then? If course some people out of 8bn will have extremist views or utterances. Is that really a surprise?

by gosub100

4/3/2025 at 10:36:01 AM

Marrying purely for "love" and ignoring core values, mindset compatibility, what they want in life and so on is a recipe for disaster, or at least some deep regrets down the line. I haven't seen nor heard about a single success story a decade or two down the line. Whom to marry is probably the most important decision in our lives. One of reasons why marrying early is too risky - people still massively change till at least 25-30, it cal still work but chances are smaller.

Its a typical junior mistake to marry for love/lust and not think a bit on top of that, in this case I blame parents who don't have some hard talks with their kids explaining them not-so-rosy parts of adult existence. Like initial enormous physical attraction wanes over time, kids crush most of remaining, and what still remains are 2 people and how they treat relationship and each other with that lust tuned down eventually to 0, under various, often not so nice situations. But our parent's generation didn't figure it all out, in contrary the amount of actually nice relationships in higher ages ain't that high.

I didn't have such prep talk neither, nor do I know anybody who had, and had to figure it all on my own via rough trials and failures till finally figuring myself and women out, and then happy marriage (so far, hard knock on the wood). Its like expecting everybody to be sophisticated engineer, learning them to count on fingers and throwing them out and good luck, I am sure you'll figure it out eventually. Some do, some don't. Most don't I'd say.

by jajko

4/3/2025 at 12:53:20 PM

> Whom to marry is probably the most important decision in our lives.

That's putting way too much pressure on it. Find someone you feel like you could spend the rest of your life with? Marry them, see what happens. If you get a divorce, so be it, it's not the end of the world and there is plenty of others out there, even if you're "damaged goods" or whatever your worry is.

I feel like the pressure people put around marriage it what makes it so damaging in the first place, people feeling like they have to marry in the first place, or if they're married, they need to try to stick together more than some couple who isn't married, and so on.

Just make a decision and learn from your mistakes in case you fuck up, it really isn't more complicated than that.

by diggan

4/3/2025 at 5:00:13 PM

I'm going to assume you're a man and probably have a little less experience here than the average woman does.

This said, I am a man too, but a large part of my career was supporting lawyers and court systems, including family court systems.

Choosing the wrong partner is one of the biggest risks you take in your life, especially for a woman. This is one of those things that can easily lead to you being bankrupt with nothing. This can lead to you being abused or raped. You can end up with a child that you did not want to have. You can end up dead.

With states pushing to revoke things like no fault divorce (and women being the primary initiators of divorce) it's not hard see the traps women lived in the past coming back.

Then add the strongly religious connotations marriage has in the US and you quickly see why this is a rollercoaster that emotions and politics are not going to be removed from.

by pixl97

4/3/2025 at 4:11:07 PM

> That's putting way too much pressure on it. Find someone you feel like you could spend the rest of your life with? Marry them, see what happens. If you get a divorce, so be it, it's not the end of the world

This is quite bad advice, because divorce can be devastating financially.

by ryandrake

4/3/2025 at 7:24:30 PM

[dead]

by throwaway29812

4/3/2025 at 10:37:22 AM

This is the sort of thing they should teach in schools. English literature is a good venue for it.

by HPsquared

4/3/2025 at 8:41:12 AM

Politics feels like an integral part of finding a partner nowadays. Which makes sense—values are important to agree upon.

by facile3232

4/3/2025 at 10:48:10 AM

The width of the spectrum of political views for 65% of people used to be relatively narrow.

That's increasingly not the case.

by ta1243

4/3/2025 at 5:03:30 PM

Capitalism "Choice is good!"

Politics "Not like that, not like that!"

I don't believe that political views used to be narrow, I believe the political views you were allowed to actually express were much more narrow and everything else was repressed.

by pixl97

4/3/2025 at 8:47:53 AM

Really depends on the region. There's lots of opinions/ideas/directions/parties in many countries with lots of overlap. In the US... I'm not sure how relationships, that actually talk about things, can survive if partners have different party preferences.

by viraptor

4/3/2025 at 6:42:26 PM

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by facile3232

4/3/2025 at 12:09:07 PM

Being friends with someone doesn't mean we both should agree on everything. It also doesn't mean we should try to avoid discussing whatever. If we agree on something, good. If someone is changing his opinion bases on a talk and arguments, good. If not, also good.

I am friend with someone because I like that someone and I enjoy meeting him and talking to him, doing things together.

That doesn't mean agreeing on everything. And doesn't mean being afraid of speaking.

If someone quits, being my friend because we have different opinions on X, so be it. I am not like that. I won't break a friendship because someone thinks differently.

by DeathArrow

4/2/2025 at 6:38:39 PM

I'll provide an opposing viewpoint. In the last 10 years, I've lost friendships and family because people in my life have voted for candidates that stripped rights away from women, minorities, etc.

Having a vast difference between opinions is fine, but some of their decisions are fundamentally against my core beliefs and have done literal harm to many people I know.

For that reason, terminating family and friendships has been absolutely worth it for me.

Until we can live in a world where fundamental rights are protected and respected, we have no common ground, and it's pointless to tiptoe around these insanely harmful beliefs while maintaining a facade of friendship.

by rdegges

4/2/2025 at 6:46:12 PM

I think essentially tolerating other peoples opinions and trying to understand where they are coming from is more useful than applying purity tests to your friends and family.

I’m pretty sure that they weren’t voting for those candidates for the express purpose of stripping away those rights and there were other policies and values that they were voting for.

I’ll be honest that I’m Jewish and certain posts about Palestine where friends or non Jewish family have specifically expressed values that I find anti-myself I have completely cut out of my life. (not all beliefs about pro Palestine are anti-semetic, but most are) But I believe that most views at the party level are just different priorities or different view points and tolerance is necessary, because they are not directly in conflict.

by daft_pink

4/3/2025 at 3:42:36 AM

> I’m pretty sure that they weren’t voting for those candidates for the express purpose of stripping away those rights and there were other policies and values that they were voting for.

I thought the GOP was pretty clear throughout the election cycle, from President to local office, that their desired world can only come to be through a drastic restructuring of the Constitutional status quo ante.

I don’t know that “I only voted for (e.g.) tax cuts, everything else is collateral damage and I’m not culpable for it,” is a defensible moral stance.

by TimorousBestie

4/3/2025 at 9:58:28 AM

First you try to argue tolerance and understanding, and then you say that "most pro-Palestine views are antisemitic" and that you cut off all contact with people who hold those views. Your hypocrisy is astounding and you should be embarrassed.

by arp242

4/3/2025 at 7:13:26 PM

What I was suggesting was to be tolerant of more general views like choosing a political party or candidate and large complicated things, and reserve intolerance for actual directed hatred.

by daft_pink

4/3/2025 at 7:36:10 PM

Yes that's why he called you a hypocrite.

by zepolen

4/3/2025 at 12:02:00 AM

> I’m pretty sure that they weren’t voting for those candidates for the express purpose of stripping away those rights and there were other policies and values that they were voting for.

Voting for a party explicitly demonstrates at least acceptance of if not outright support for its platform. You don't get to absolve yourself of support for kicking puppies because the FooBar party also includes a modest tax cut in its policy agenda that you really want.

It doesn't matter if the opposing party advocates for raising taxes or even eating kittens.

That's true even if realistically, there are no other parties capable of winning. You can support a third party, abstain out of protest, or even begin a grass-roots campaign to start yet another party. You can even try changing the FooBar party from within, so long as you don't vote for them until sufficient change has occurred.

by atmavatar

4/3/2025 at 4:13:27 AM

Voting for a party explicitly demonstrates at least acceptance of if not outright support for its platform. You don't get to absolve yourself of support for kicking puppies because the FooBar party also includes a modest tax cut in its policy agenda that you really want.

Virtually no independent thinker is going to support either major party's platform, for the simple reason that both parties have a collection of inconsistent policies that are an incoherent ideological mishmash. Therefore you do not so much vote FOR a party as you instead hold your nose and vote AGAINST the other one.

by btilly

4/3/2025 at 5:18:32 AM

Sure, but in the US, the choices right now are between a party that you might not fully agree with, and a party whose explicit platform is to strip fundamental rights away from women, LGBTQ people, and other minorities, all while dismantling the basic structures of democracy in order to guarantee their hold on power for as long as possible.

When you vote for a party, you may not fully agree with all their policies, but you are stating that the drawbacks are acceptable compromises. When you vote for FooBar, you might not want puppies to be kicked, but you consider it a tradeoff worth making if it gets you that tax cut.

If you are looking at the political landscape of the US as an independent thinker, and are questioning whether abandoning the principles of human rights and liberal democracy are a tradeoff worth making, then I really question whether your thoughts are really as independent as you would like to believe.

by MrJohz

4/3/2025 at 7:20:20 AM

> and a party whose explicit platform is to strip fundamental rights away from women, LGBTQ people, and other minorities, all while dismantling the basic structures of democracy in order to guarantee their hold on power for as long as possible.

This certainly might be what you believe their platform amounts to. But it is most certainly not their explicit platform. Accuse people of what they actually have done, not what you believe their actions to be logically equivalent to. Otherwise there can't actually be a reasonable discussion, because you're giving off heat rather than light.

by bigstrat2003

4/3/2025 at 9:43:11 AM

This is their explicit platform. Trump's presidential campaign officially ran on the basis of "Agenda 47", which clearly sets out their goals and aims. It includes dismantling the basic structures of democracy (in the form of heavy expansion of executive powers), and reducing access to healthcare for women and LGBTQ people. We have already seen evidence of the above, as well as events like the new administration arresting protestors without due process.

I think your point is that Project 2025 is not Trump's explicit platform, which is correct (although this doesn't affect my statement which was about his explicit platform). However, if it looks, walks, and talks like a duck, we also need to be willing to call it a duck. Project 2025 goes significantly above and beyond Agenda 47, the group behind it explicitly endorse Trump, and many of Project 2025's authors are involved in the Trump administration. Being an "independent thinker" does not mean accepting what both sides say at face value, it means looking at people's behaviour and drawing judgements based on that.

by MrJohz

4/3/2025 at 7:32:08 AM

Actions speaker louder than words. It might not be their platform, but it's what they're doing. If you see your party taking action to strip away rights from LGBTQ groups, immigrants, women and you still support them, then I don't know what else to say.

by yibg

4/3/2025 at 3:22:00 PM

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by const_cast

4/3/2025 at 6:58:40 AM

This is the problem with a two-party system. It makes every citizen either complicit in the worst party or the second-worst party.

You can't hold who they voted for against people in a two-party system. There just isn't enough choice.

by FeepingCreature

4/3/2025 at 6:34:34 PM

> "...women, ... and other minorities..."

According to polls, slightly more women voted for Trump in 2024 than in 2020 and significantly more minorities voted for Trump in 2024 than in 2020 (https://www.nbcwashington.com/decision-2024/2024-voter-turno...). One party energetically claims to be on the side of the oppressed but the oppressed don't exactly seem to be flocking to be on the side of that party. Makes you think, doesn't it?

The Democrats cannot win as long as there's a substantial faction inside it unwilling to face the reality of what voters actually think instead of what they want to tell the voters to think.

by ThrowawayR2

4/3/2025 at 6:52:07 PM

You are giving a fully partisan version from one side, while ignoring the partisan view from the other. Not entirely your fault correctly stating what the other side thinks, in terms that the other side will agree with, is an extremely hard task. It sounds like it should be simple. But getting it right requires getting past our cognitive biases that the other side is wrong, which make it hard to actually see what they are seeing.

Here is a Republican take that is about as biased as your take on Republicans. "Democrats are fully infected by the woke mind virus, destroying merit in favor of DEI, promoting antisemitism in support of Hamas terrorism, and suppressing free speech in favor of totalitarian control."

Both partisan perspective have some truth, and a lot that is false. For example, while it is true that Trump represents a threat to democracy, threatening democracy is not part of the Republican party's explicit platform. Conversely, while it is true that there has been a sharp rise in antisemitism on the left, most of that really is antizionism. (That said, if you try to make Palestine free from sea to sea, where will over 7 million Jewish refugees go? You're unlikely to be more lucky than Hitler was in the 1930s in finding a country who is willing to accept them. What happens then?)

by btilly

4/3/2025 at 3:39:28 AM

I disagree, but I think moral purity is a less ethical way of living than practical action - best exemplified by the story of the Good Samaritan.

Similarly to “silence is complicity.” Refusing to oppose a party by choosing the other is indicating acceptance of what they will do.

by lazyasciiart

4/3/2025 at 4:36:31 AM

This is a fundamental difference with how people on the (American) left and people on the right view politics. Those on the right frequently vote based on a single or a few issues, ignoring the rest of the platform that may be unpalatable. While those on the left frequently view voting as an endorsement of the whole person. Any unwanted policy tends to be a turn off. It's why you say "you don't get to absolve yourself of support for kicking puppies" while the right does just that. You would be better served understanding the values and motivations of your opposition rather than projecting your values onto them and judging them based on a strawman.

by hackinthebochs

4/3/2025 at 5:46:17 AM

I would've probably agreed with this point 10 or 15 years ago. Someone saying "I would've liked universal healthcare, but lower taxes are more important to me" has an understandable position. I might not agree with their choice, but I can respect their decision.

However, these days the American political landscape looks a lot different. I understand having priorities, but if someone believes that a magical make-eggs-be-cheaper plan should have a higher priority than their friend (i.e., me) having basic human rights, why would I want to be friends with them? It doesn't matter if they personally agree with the politician's strip-their-friend-of-basic-rights plans or not, the fact that it isn't a priority to them at all says enough.

by crote

4/3/2025 at 6:56:09 AM

What basic rights do I have that you don't, and where are these codified?

by genewitch

4/3/2025 at 4:22:56 PM

In the US there are no federal antidiscrimination protections for LGBT people except in employment through Bostock (and conveniently, Trump's EEOC has stopped pursuing these cases). You can be evicted from your home for being gay but not for being black or Christian.

Access to gender affirming care for trans minors is banned in more than half of US states. The very same medicines are allowed to be given to cis minors.

In 13 US states bathroom bills prevent trans people from comfortably existing outside of their homes for more than a few hours at a time.

It has only been 22 years since sodomy laws were found unconstitutional. It has only been 10 years since gay marriage was legalized nationwide. Thomas wrote in his Dobbs concurrence that Lawrence should be revisited. Several state legislatures have passed resolutions calling for Obergefell to be overturned.

While less of a "basic right", the Trump administration has banned trans people from serving in the military. Visibility of gay or trans characters in media available for minors is also regularly threatened. Products for trans people sold at stores like Target have led to bomb threats.

by UncleMeat

4/3/2025 at 7:41:54 PM

> Access to gender affirming care for trans minors is banned in more than half of US states. The very same medicines are allowed to be given to cis minors.

The Cass report conclusions and recommendations should be listened to, it was a way better and more thorough study than the Netherlands study that begat all of the "gender clinics" in the US and elsewhere. https://webarchive.nationalarchives.gov.uk/ukgwa/20250310143...

> In 13 US states bathroom bills prevent trans people from comfortably existing outside of their homes for more than a few hours at a time.

As far as bathrooms, i feel uncomfortable in public restrooms. I don't know what the rate of people that feel uncomfortable in public restrooms, but those of us that do find family or single occupant restrooms, and know what places have those. No one wants to piss in a literal trough, i could be wrong.

I don't consider sodomy a basic human right, but i could be argued with, i guess.

I don't see what "bomb threats" have to do with human rights, in this context. Is there a human right to have products available at Target? If everyone boycotted Target (like they did with Bud Light), is that a violation of human rights, too?

I am unsure why people keep deleting their replies. It is possible to have a reasoned discussion about inflammatory topics.

by genewitch

4/3/2025 at 7:57:02 PM

This is how things often goes. "Oh those aren't actually rights."

You can think this, I suppose. But let me tell you that a very large number of LGBT people do consider these things to be questions of their basic rights.

by UncleMeat

4/3/2025 at 8:08:47 PM

i'm willing to listen to arguments about why any of those are basic rights. I am unsure about the housing, so i didn't mention it. Upon a quick check, Bostock prevents renters from being evicted or otherwise un-housed merely for being LGBT. Unless i see actual writing that shows there is a literal directive to ignore complaints, i cannot just accept your words. top results for eviction of LGBT sort of news is about people "behind on rent." If i don't pay rent for 2 months, i'll also get an eviction notice (sometimes called a pay or quit.)

there's groups of people that think all kinds of things are "basic rights" but it doesn't mean they are. I could say nothing is a "basic right" since any example you can give is violated globally. Maybe some stuff should be globally truly basic rights. But i am willing to listen to arguments that any of these things are a basic right as it stands.

just a for instance: Sodomy. saying it's a human right implies that sexual intercourse is a basic human right. I am unsure if you really want to make this argument.

by genewitch

4/3/2025 at 8:42:44 PM

Bostock applies to Title 7. The reasoning is that discrimination based on sexuality or gender identity is sex discrimination, which can be applied to other laws like the FHA but this is not established federally and the Trump administration is currently in legal fights explicitly in opposition to this position. So I do not think that it is fair to say that Bostock prevents renters from being evicted based on their gender identity or sexuality.

[Here](https://www.eeoc.gov/newsroom/removing-gender-ideology-and-r...) is an EEOC's "literal directive" pulling back on relevant cases. If you want specific cases then [this article](https://www.cbsnews.com/news/eeoc-transgender-discrimination...) references specific ongoing cases that have been dropped by the EEOC.

And I do think the ability to have consenting and private intercourse without being imprisoned is a human right. I did not expect that this would be controversial.

by UncleMeat

4/3/2025 at 8:52:39 PM

the eeoc link doesn't mention housing or "rent." https://www.findlaw.com/lgbtq-law/housing-discrimination-pro... this says that HUD and DoJ handle those cases.

If you're talking about employment (which the EEOC appears to cover) - i've been fired for not cutting my hair short enough. I've been fired for refusing to wear a tie for a cubicle job. In the US, employment is at-will, generally. If that's what you have an issue with, then let's talk about that. Even if the issue is with hiring discrimination of any kind, i can get behind that, too.

And there's a subtle, yet perceivable difference between what you said, "sodomy laws" and your statement now about "consenting and private intercourse." i also notice you didn't mention "between adults."

I don't really want to have a side-channel discussion, here. The employment vs housing statements, you either had a typo, or it was a red herring, i am unsure. I feel like this is devolving, perhaps of my own fault, into a god of the gaps argument.

by genewitch

4/3/2025 at 9:10:12 PM

My original comment regarding the EEOC was about the impotence of Bostock in modern federal courts because the EEOC is dropping cases of Title 7 workplace discrimination brought by LGBT people. Although the US generally has at-will employment, there are certain reasons for firing people that are prohibited by law.

The discussion of housing is separate from that and is instead a point about the fact that LGBT people do not have federal protections in this domain. I thought that my post was very clear. LGBT people do not have any federal protections in many domains (housing for example). They have protections in some domains (employment, via Bostock) and even that is backsliding because of the EEOC's changing behavior.

Only adults can consent. The sodomy laws struck down in Lawrence were about consenting and private intercourse, both in general and in the very specific case of Mr. Lawrence.

I am extremely uninterested in any discussion that smacks of painting gay people and their relationships as in any way related to child rape.

by UncleMeat

4/3/2025 at 7:16:00 AM

[flagged]

by JohnKemeny

4/3/2025 at 4:49:15 AM

Does it matter what drives someone to vote for a candidate if the outcome is all the same? It feels like we're discussing manslaughter vs. first degree murder. I don't want to be friends with someone who takes the life of someone else and doesn't feel remorse for it.

Maybe it's a good theoretical exercise, but life is too short for me to appreciate the various reasons that might drive someone to become an asshole.

by SecretDreams

4/2/2025 at 7:31:18 PM

I totally get where you're coming from. But regardless of their reason for voting for a candidate, if the net effect is that 150m+ women lost rights and other horrible outcomes, it's the same as endorsing it.

by rdegges

4/3/2025 at 3:44:41 AM

It's not though.

Looking at exit pool demographics might help if you're struggling to have any empathy for a Trump voter. They are largely working class and undereducated and astonishingly diverse for a republican candidate in recent memory.

by gmoot

4/3/2025 at 4:44:24 AM

There's an amazing ability for people to not believe Trump is going to do the things he says. See Venezuelan immigrants getting screwed over or the recent tariffs.

by hooverd

4/3/2025 at 3:36:55 AM

But.. You're going against your own principles here, you can't say that purity test bad and then have a purity test yourself.

by 0dayz

4/3/2025 at 4:52:38 AM

Your purity tests are bad. Their purity tests are righteous.

by lovich

4/3/2025 at 8:15:12 AM

Aha, thank you so much, I understand now.

I really should read the philosophical school of "me good, you bad" it sounds so convenient.

by 0dayz

4/3/2025 at 4:16:11 AM

> than applying purity tests to your friends and family

It's more about watching people pivot towards unquestionable evil. "Empathy is a sin" is such a deep, dark line in the sand. I'm not going to just stand there and watch you cross it.

by gopher_space

4/3/2025 at 7:47:31 AM

I think there is value in trying to understand the other "tribe". If for nothing else, then for practical reasons in figuring out how to defeat the other tribe at the next encounter.

I also think especially in today's political environment, political beliefs at least partially reflect an individual's core values. In some cases I may not want to associate with people that have fundamentally opposing core values to my own. For example this guy's interviews with his parents: https://www.tiktok.com/@thenecessaryconversation

by yibg

4/3/2025 at 2:25:52 PM

> I’m pretty sure that they weren’t voting for those candidates for the express purpose of stripping away those rights and there were other policies and values that they were voting for

I don't know, man. If they're really your friends, those should be non-negotiable.

by moolcool

4/3/2025 at 11:40:18 AM

Didn't these friends and family essentially apply purity tests to us?

I've cut off my aunt who still claims the 2020 election was stolen. The data I worked with to support fragile communities was removed/altered in the transition (CDC Social Vulnerability Index). I've already lost my job in the federal purge. I have a [former] coworker who was born intersexed that cannot be legally recognized by the government. I'll likely lose my right to marry due to my aunt's beliefs. My boyfriend will likely lose access to lifesaving medication with cuts to funding. My grandma is paying for hospice care with social security and claiming Trump is fixing the country. I'm renewing my passport; several friends have already left the country.

by thrwaway438

4/3/2025 at 2:14:25 PM

> I’m pretty sure that they weren’t voting for those candidates for the express purpose of stripping away those rights and there were other policies and values that they were voting for.

I'm sure there were people who voted for the Republican party in the last USA election for purely economic reasons. However, "anti-woke" policies were absolutely the most important issue for a lot of people. Just this week the attorney general in my state posted an "April Fool's Day Joke" where the "joke" was him standing next to a LGBT flag.

by jccalhoun

4/3/2025 at 3:30:00 AM

Most views on Palestine are just different priorities or different viewpoints too. You can equally say that not all support for Trump is rooted in misogyny and xenophobia, but most is. Perhaps you should not recommend that other people engage in such tolerance when you won’t.

by lazyasciiart

4/3/2025 at 4:44:30 PM

> I’m pretty sure that they weren’t voting for those candidates for the express purpose of stripping away those rights and there were other policies and values that they were voting for.

In some markets, about one third of the entire Trump campaign advertising was fear-mongering about how dangerous LGBTQ people are. They wouldn't have spent so much on this if they didn't think it was a uniquely important to their constituents.

I think you're unequivocally wrong if you don't think that Conservatives in the US are above voting for a single issue.

I don't know enough about the Palestine/Israel conflict to be able to make an informed opinion on it, so I won't comment on that.

by tombert

4/3/2025 at 7:53:00 PM

> I don't know enough about the Palestine/Israel conflict to be able to make an informed opinion on it, so I won't comment on that.

Wise, given the guilt & political climate. But, see also:

  Progressive except Palestine (also known as PEP) is a phrase that refers to organizations or individuals who describe themselves politically as progressive, liberal, or left-wing but who do not express pro-Palestinian sentiment or do not comment on the Israeli–Palestinian conflict.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Progressive_except_Palestine

by ignoramous

4/3/2025 at 8:09:27 PM

The issue is that I feel like there's an awful lot of opinions on this, and it's difficult for me to find objective information on this stuff.

I tend to be pretty progressive, so it's probable I would be more on the Palestine side, but I try not to express strong opinions on things that I haven't done at least a cursory amount of research on, and I also don't really want to be labeled an antisemite or racist or anything like that.

by tombert

4/3/2025 at 5:10:56 AM

> I’m pretty sure that they weren’t voting for those candidates for the express purpose of stripping away those rights and there were other policies and values that they were voting for.

Well, Alabama outlawed abortion except for life of the mother. A federal judge had to rule that the state can't prosecute doctors and reproductive health organizations for helping patients travel out of the state to obtain abortions. The Project 2025 plan is for the Republican controlled Congress to at some point pass the most restrictive federal abortion law they can get away with.

That is stripping away the rights of women to choose. There are many religious conservatives who support this.

by goatlover

4/3/2025 at 7:27:50 AM

That's one possible framing. But from their perspective, they are defending the lives of innocents from those who wish to do them harm. If one accepts their framing of the issue, that's a righteous cause indeed. Why is your framing accurate, and theirs inaccurate?

You're doing what so many people do in the abortion debate, and begging the question. You can't simply sidestep deep differences of opinion on moral issues by declaring your position to be right and theirs wrong. It's wilful ignorance of a whole lot of nuance that exists on this topic, nuance that must be engaged with if one wishes to be effective in having a discussion.

by bigstrat2003

4/3/2025 at 8:44:42 AM

Their framing needs to acknowledge that the fetus is part of the mother's body, not an independent life, and that child birth has risks. Thus the autonomy of the mother over her own body has to be part of the discussion. Their framing can't depend on a soul entering at conception, or God/their sacred scripture telling them abortion is murder. That's not a rational or legal basis for compelling other people who don't believe that way.

If they want to enter a scientific discussion on viability and neural development for when to start placing limits on abortion, and how making victims of rape or incest carry to term is ethical, then we can have a meaningful discussion.

Otherwise, they can feel free to go have their own theocratic community in the wilderness where they don't choose to have abortion. Also known as Alabama these days, unfortunately for those stuck wandering the wilderness with them.

by goatlover

4/3/2025 at 8:54:18 AM

> I think essentially tolerating other peoples opinions and trying to understand where they are coming from is more useful than applying purity tests to your friends and family.

Most of the time this is just being an enabler, who excuses, makes up rationales and blames "the other side" for not being nice enough to extremists. Especially when we talk with about fascist close groups. People who say this achieve only limitations on the opposition to extremists. They rarely or never manage to move extremist into the center.

> I’m pretty sure that they weren’t voting for those candidates for the express purpose of stripping away those rights and there were other policies and values that they were voting for.

Why are you so sure? There are plenty of conservatives who openly talk about it. It is not being tolerant when you decide that no one is allowed to do that observation. You are not being neutral here, you are biasing the discussion toward the extremism when you do it.

by watwut

4/3/2025 at 4:15:20 PM

[dead]

by UncleMeat

4/3/2025 at 5:45:14 AM

[flagged]

by curiousgal

4/3/2025 at 9:29:33 AM

> I’m pretty sure that they weren’t voting for those candidates for the express purpose of stripping away those rights and there were other policies and values that they were voting for.

Sure. But this is that age-old meme: You know those people (most people?) in 1930s Germany who supported the Nazi party but they perhaps weren't really for annexations and genocide. You know what they call those people? Nazis.

People who voted for Trump are responsible for the fate of Ukraine, the demise of Nato, the fallout with Canada and Mexico, the inevitable inflation and economic turmoil of tariffs etc. And that's of course even if they only voted for Trump because they hold "traditional republican values", or because of single issues like gun rights, migration or taxes.

> tolerance is necessary

Tolerance stops at intolerance. You can never tolerate intolerance. Apart from that, politics also relies on a few fundamental things like the reliance on facts and experts, and respect for the rule of law. Obviously you can't ever tolerate "politics" which starts to tamper with either of these. Luckily I can keep a tribe which consists of people who agree with this, which can vote for any party in my parliament, and is 98% of the population. I'd hate to be in the US though where the tribes cut down the middle of the population.

by alkonaut

4/2/2025 at 9:35:29 PM

I actually agree, I don't think people should merely dismiss differences on issues that strike at core values -- I think it's okay to cut friends/family off on huge differences in values. I have actually done this to both left and right-leaning friends.

But what I'm arguing is that most people do not actually come to these values by way of thinking, but rather by blindly adopting them en masse from their chosen tribe.

And when they choose not to be open to the possibility they might be wrong, then they have a religion, not a intellectually-driven view.

This is okay if acknowledged imo, as per this sentence in the piece:

"If someone is self-aware enough to consciously acknowledge their choice to remain in the bubble, that’s totally fair. I respect it like I’d respect anyone who chooses to participate in a more traditional religion. My issue is when this view is falsely passed off as an intellectually-driven one."

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 11:25:58 AM

I can appreciate comparing these immovable political stances to a "religion".

One thing I've noticed, as people get more entrenched in their viewpoint, is that they stop accepting the possibility that they're wrong, and this flawed thinking starts to extend to the wildest corners of their position.

"Well, if I'm right about the person, the person is right about everything too. And anyone who disagrees with me is therefore wrong about EVERYTHING."

It's a very shallow viewpoint, and some people just refuse to accept that they're wrong sometimes.

by nerptastic

4/3/2025 at 4:45:23 AM

One way people keep themselves in bubbles is by dismissing counter opinions as being tribal or trendy. Some opinions may appear that way because the people that have them seem similar. But it could also be due to them having similar backgrounds that led them to those opinions. For example, most doctors believe in vaccines, but that's not group think, it's based in evidence that they have studied. From the outside, it might seem like group think.

by KyleJune

4/3/2025 at 8:59:24 PM

My method to discern between beliefs with intellectual backing and those from the community is by presenting them with some bizarro counterargument. If they copy/paste specific phrases and keywords, it's from the community. If they engage with the argument and refute it, then they have given them proper thought.

by BeFlatXIII

4/3/2025 at 6:30:08 AM

correct, but then those individuals could explain those views

popularity is not the same as tribal, tribal implies a blind following -- when individuals cannot explain why they believe something

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 2:57:43 PM

> For example, most doctors believe in vaccines, but that's not group think, it's based in evidence that they have studied. From the outside, it might seem like group think.

I'm willing to bet that in most cases, that is groupthink. It's hard to tell, because the conclusion is identical to one based on evidence, so you can't infer from the opinion whether it's groupthink or not.

Sometimes you can tell by how someone holds a belief. Defensiveness, unwillingness to consider ways in which their chosen belief is not 100% wholly good, or shouting someone down are evidence of groupthink. For example: if someone brings up that in the past some inactive virus vaccines contained live viruses and a doctor claims that it never happened and could never happen, that's either groupthink or just a doctor sick of arguing with uninformed patients who has given up bothering with explaining the intellectual basis of his beliefs.

My personal suspicion is that the 1% don't exist, that everyone's opinions and beliefs are a mishmash of tribalism and intellectual conclusions, it's just that the balance is very different in different people. I try very hard to make my stances intellectually based and evidence-driven, yet I continually discover that more and more of my deeply held policy positions aren't as clear cut and the real world is more nuanced than I thought.

It's not like nuance is a binary thing (by definition!)

by sfink

4/2/2025 at 6:47:25 PM

If you remove yourself from a group, how will they change their minds without a dissenting opinion? I had to do it myself eventually, for my own sanity, but I believe this is still a real problem I am no longer addressing among my loved ones.

by pcblues

4/2/2025 at 7:27:43 PM

In my case, my goal isn't to change anyone's mind. It's to preserve sanity -- I can't in good faith "pretend" to get along and have normal conversations when people are actively engaging in behavior that directly harms myself and others.

by rdegges

4/3/2025 at 4:44:47 AM

Could you give an example of behavior that "directly" harmed yourself or others which caused you to sever ties?

Politics is almost always indirect, usually with multiple levels of indirection.

by fastball

4/3/2025 at 5:11:56 AM

People proudly voting for parties and policies that demonise trans people, of which I know many. I cannot be your friend in good conscience if you're willing to destroy the lives of my other friends.

by Philpax

4/3/2025 at 7:29:58 AM

That is, by definition, indirect. So that doesn't qualify as "directly harming" anyone, even if your analysis of those policies is otherwise accurate.

by bigstrat2003

4/3/2025 at 8:35:44 PM

No it isn’t. When people see the anti trans party winning elections they see that as permission to bully trans people. The vote directly leads to abuse.

by HDThoreaun

4/3/2025 at 7:10:33 AM

How are their lives being destroyed?

Being told that you have to follow the same rules as everyone else for e.g. spaces designated to be used solely by the opposite sex, doesn't seem so bad.

by duckfan

4/3/2025 at 7:16:08 AM

I don't believe you're asking this question in good faith, but there are many, many attempts at erasing them from public existence: https://translegislation.com/

by Philpax

4/3/2025 at 7:28:57 AM

Please define "erasing them from public existence". Provide concrete actions that are actively being taken, not vague concepts of "bad things".

by bakugo

4/3/2025 at 7:46:03 AM

I would recommend clicking on the link and scrolling down.

by Philpax

4/3/2025 at 1:03:22 PM

Not answering question.

by tekla

4/3/2025 at 7:51:31 AM

I did. It's almost nothing but intentionally obtuse terms that mask the actual issues being discussed.

For example, what exactly is "gender-affirming care"? Because I suspect that includes giving life-altering drugs to young children.

by bakugo

4/3/2025 at 9:26:11 AM

Gender-affirming care is good and needed to protect kids.

by rimbo789

4/3/2025 at 7:07:28 PM

A lot of people strongly believe this to be true. However, the evidence does not support this.

by duckfan

4/3/2025 at 9:29:40 AM

[flagged]

by banqjls

4/3/2025 at 8:04:32 AM

[dead]

by duckfan

4/3/2025 at 8:41:22 AM

"destroying and erasing" trans people = not overtly pushing for there spread and acceptance

by akimbostrawman

4/3/2025 at 12:38:04 PM

Assuming you're actually arguing in good faith, the "erasing" bit has been quite obvious and blatant.

https://edition.cnn.com/2025/02/13/us/stonewall-inn-national...

Removing people from information about a historical event doesn't look good under any lens.

by reef_sh

4/3/2025 at 12:58:59 PM

Doesn't this change make it more historically accurate? In 1969, the year of the Stonewall uprising, the "TQ+" hadn't been invented yet as a cultural concept. The Stonewall Inn was a gay bar and was being targeted for that reason.

by duckfan

4/3/2025 at 1:20:59 PM

Not really, no, especially considering the involvement of trans people in the event itself.

For example, see the section regarding "Zazu Nova" on the current page

https://www.nps.gov/ston/learn/photosmultimedia/virtual-fenc...

and before the erasure

https://web.archive.org/web/20250202042345/https://www.nps.g...

by reef_sh

4/3/2025 at 2:06:54 PM

Interesting to see the difference and I agree that's an inaccurate edit. For historical accuracy it should describe Zazu Nova as a gay man who was also a transvestite or drag queen.

by duckfan

4/3/2025 at 2:43:50 PM

You do realize that "gay man", "transvestite", "drag queen", and "trans woman" are all different things right?

None of them implies the others. And using any term besides trans woman would be disingenuous, as trans people existed before before 1969, with that exact nomenclature already existing. Just because the letters might not have been attached to an "LGBT" title, neither T or Q are new. Only their increased acceptance and knowledge is.

And deleting references to those is, as you can see, seen as an obvious attempt to walk back on that public perception and acceptance.

While ( as often is ) a very summarized version of the history can be found on the wikipedia page https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transgender_history , the sources should lead you to more detailed info, if you do care about learning about the historical accuracy.

by reef_sh

4/3/2025 at 4:38:09 PM

The Stonewall Inn was a gay bar so we know that Zazu Nova must have been there due to being a gay man. As the previous iteration of the website describes Nova as "queen", "she" and "transgender woman", this means that in 1960s terminology Nova would almost certainly have been understood to be a transvestite, possibly a drag queen.

Sources on the web refer to Nova having involvement with the Street Transvestites Action Revolutionaries group, which fits with that description also.

by duckfan

4/3/2025 at 5:15:53 PM

I don't think they're arguing in a good faith with you.

"“Never believe that anti-Semites are completely unaware of the absurdity of their replies. They know that their remarks are frivolous, open to challenge. But they are amusing themselves, for it is their adversary who is obliged to use words responsibly, since he believes in words. The anti-Semites have the right to play. They even like to play with discourse for, by giving ridiculous reasons, they discredit the seriousness of their interlocutors. They delight in acting in bad faith, since they seek not to persuade by sound argument but to intimidate and disconcert. If you press them too closely, they will abruptly fall silent, loftily indicating by some phrase that the time for argument is past.”

by StefanBatory

4/3/2025 at 2:19:26 PM

This is an oversimplified strawman argument. Biological sex is a complex subject. The cultural understanding of sex is complex. If I has a man take my 2 year old daughter to the men's room is that a bad thing? (For the record I don't have any children)

by jccalhoun

4/3/2025 at 4:31:52 PM

I don't think anyone is arguing that you should be barred from taking your hypothetical two-year-old daughter into the men's bathroom if the need arises. That's really not the issue.

by duckfan

4/3/2025 at 5:53:20 PM

but I thought "Being told that you have to follow the same rules as everyone else for e.g. spaces designated to be used solely by the opposite sex, doesn't seem so bad."?

by jccalhoun

4/3/2025 at 6:30:17 PM

Perhaps think on that a bit more then. Consider for example that female-only spaces don't exclude women who are pregnant with male babies.

by duckfan

4/3/2025 at 2:51:04 PM

I am bi, my "friends" would hate LGBT people, constantly talk how we're pedophiles and so on, and kept voting for parties against equal rights.

by StefanBatory

4/3/2025 at 7:26:30 AM

So, basically, you believe that everyone who doesn't strictly adhere to your own ideologies is insane.

You're pretty much the exact kind of person that the article talks about.

by bakugo

4/3/2025 at 3:41:38 AM

[flagged]

by lazyasciiart

4/3/2025 at 3:33:40 AM

[flagged]

by manfre

4/3/2025 at 2:57:03 PM

I'm jealous of you. I've got a limited number of family members and friends and find it difficult to get more of either. I don't think I'm in a position to burn them on politics so I'll just have to take them as they are.

by hackeraccount

4/3/2025 at 8:18:04 PM

Wow. This is well put. Thanks. I wonder how those so quick to write others off will reflect on it at the end of life.

by sporkit150

4/3/2025 at 2:51:02 PM

+1. I had to cut a lot of people out of my life after seeing the Democrats' response to October 7th. I cannot be friends with anybody who votes for candidates that support exterminating Jews.

by HamsterDan

4/3/2025 at 6:49:40 PM

+1. I'm cutting people out of my life who think it's justified to harass families on the street or write Nazi symbols on their property because they happen to be riding in a particular brand of car. Fascism/Nazism should not be tolerated.

by qwerpy

4/3/2025 at 10:13:40 PM

I agree that’s why Musk should driven out of society

by rimbo789

4/3/2025 at 7:52:17 AM

The question then becomes how to convert a member of a tribe to ones own correct tribe. It's a very tough question to answer.

It's like spycraft during the cold war. A double agent must pass as being in both tribes for the good of their country. They literally isolate themselves from their homelands tribe to embed themselves in another. They are forever changed. They can't go back. In other words: to change another changes oneself too. It weakens ones own group identity.

Almost all people would never want to risk their identity to change another person for the good of their group. It's very risky and very painful.

Another way that the article suggests is to let people change themselves.

by thinkingemote

4/3/2025 at 10:49:53 AM

Lol. "Liberal" people create an echo chamber by eliminate opposing opinions and then are surprised that people elect far-right candidates.

> Until we can live in a world where fundamental rights are protected and respected

It wasn't hiding from uncomfortable things, opinions and people, that created the world where you can even think about women or minority rights, or even know how to write to express your opnions. So this approach will not create the world you described.

by yhavr

4/3/2025 at 11:17:57 AM

indeed. This kind of attitude is contrary to what is needed to produce the sort of world desired.

The conceptualization of what fundamental even means is very much subjective, so posing such a condition to dialogue is, in principle, the negation of possibility of improvement on either side.

this is the core kernel of what a tribe even is in my opinion: pose a subjective condition, divide people based on it.

by Dansvidania

4/3/2025 at 4:15:33 PM

The subtle art of not giving a f** had a great chapter on the importance of deciding your values, that is, what's important to you. The parent advice clearly stated what's important: living in a world where fundamental rights are protected and respected.

Clearly defined values are fine until we get more specific though. What values? Whose responsibility? And what's holding is back from achieving what we want even if our party is in charge? Is it a matter of excluding people who disagree with us? More money? Or is the utopian vision we're attempting not presently achievable?

So is an agreement on fundamental rights for everyone what you want to live your life on? Or do you have other priorities in the meantime where you can agree with people on more immediate matters?

by havblue

4/3/2025 at 4:01:43 AM

How does having less friends actually benefit you though? It just seems dumb, because presumably you were friends for some reason.

I don't see how cutting them out creates a positive. It's like "Javy thinks men can become women", now I have one less person to play disc golf with.

What's the point of that? People can have different opinions, it's not their only character trait.

by hattmall

4/3/2025 at 4:41:48 AM

I don't have friends for the sake of "having friends". I choose the people I want to hang out with because I enjoy their company and like/respect them. Being around them makes me happy.

Similarly, people I dislike (rude or mean people, for example) make me unhappy when I'm around them. Cutting them out of my life is a net benefit there too, because I'm happier without them.

by petersellers

4/3/2025 at 4:50:51 PM

The other comment I made here was flagged, though it very clearly doesn't have anything in violation of the rules. It's clear that people here are using flagging to try to censor opinions they don't like.

by kerkeslager

4/3/2025 at 5:13:06 AM

> how does having less friends benefit you?

Quality over quantity for a start.

> people can have different opinions

Not every opinion deserves the same level of tolerance, respect or acceptance. If someone I know starts goose-stepping I’m not going to write it off a “just a difference in opinion.”

by theshackleford

4/3/2025 at 4:44:58 AM

[flagged]

by kerkeslager

4/2/2025 at 6:45:51 PM

Elsewhere in this thread I've said that you can have non-judgemental, solicitous conversations with anyone, just to learn how they feel or think about something.

But I agree with parent that it's perfectly justifiable to draw lines that limit potential relationships. You're not obligated to welcome everyone or tolerate views in others that have unbearable consequences for yourself. Vote with your feet.

by fatbird

4/3/2025 at 4:37:14 PM

I haven't talked to my grandmother since Trump won the first time in 2016.

It wasn't just that she voted for him, but the fact that she actively supported all of his policies around immigration, including mass deportations that would have included my wife (who was on DACA at the time). She has also said some extremely disturbing stuff about what should happen to gay people that I don't even know that I can post without breaking some form of TOS, which would be horrible already, but slightly worse to me because my sister is gay.

It's easy to say "just be neutral and don't talk about politics around her", but there are some issues with that.

First, you don't know my grandmother; no matter how much I try and avoid any political subject she will keep bringing it up. She will divert a conversation about my job as a software engineer to somehow a rant about how Mexicans are stealing American jobs (this actually happened). I could just roll my eyes and bite my tongue, but this brings me to my next point:

Second, neutrality isn't neutral. I don't really know who started this myth that somehow avoiding the subject is "not taking a side", it's just a lazy way to endorse the status quo. If I keep trying to be amicable with people who actively want my wife to be deported, then that's sort of signaling to my wife that I don't give a shit about what happens to her. I don't want to signal that, because it's not true. At that point, my only option is to either stop talking to my grandmother or talk to her and constantly push back she says something racist or horrible, which isn't productive.

Before you give me shit over this, all of you do this. You all draw the line somewhere. You probably all draw it at different points than I do, but you absolutely do draw the line. If your best friend suddenly joined the Klan and became the Grand Wizard, you probably wouldn't continue being friends with them, even if you could avoid talking politics, because that would signal that you're ok with their racism. You also probably wouldn't be friends with Jeffrey Dahmer even if you could avoid the whole "killing and eating people" topic.

As it stands, I don't really feel bad for cutting her off. I absolutely do not make a concession for age on this. If you're going to live as a grownup in 2025 then it's not wrong to judge someone by 2025 standards. I don't give a fuck what the world was like when you grew up, you have to live in the world as it is now.

by tombert

4/3/2025 at 3:25:28 AM

Maybe try understanding that expecting everyone to hold their nose and vote for the dog shit alternative "opposition" candidates provided is not a good litmus test for friendship either.

by gedy

4/3/2025 at 4:08:53 PM

And I say this with all sincerity: I'm also disappointed in my friends continually voting for Democratic candidates after Obama, as it's clear the DNC will do nothing as long as they can rely on these votes. They put up losing and awful candidates while supposedly our democracy depends on it.

If I were to cut them off as friends for being part of the problem, that sounds unreasonable right?

by gedy

4/3/2025 at 8:13:12 PM

Why does it sound unreasonable? If it's problem that affects you deeply enough, if you sincerely believe that they're a core part of that problem, then I don't see why the person you replied to would be opposed to it.

by themacguffinman

4/2/2025 at 6:57:36 PM

[flagged]

by bayarearefugee

4/3/2025 at 9:19:24 AM

Whataboutism is outsider tribe X also does thing B therefore B is not to be argued about.

Instead maybe consider that it's thinking in tribes that's the issue at root.

Personally I think it's impossible to stop being in a tribe. One should, if free, only be able to choose the tribe to join. We can't choose not to join a tribe. Most people either are not free to choose or not willing to consider that they can choose. Freedom to choose a tribe is very scary.

Looking at how other countries do politics might help. For example did you know that conspiracy and paranoia is a characteristic strategy used in American politics? It's not used as much in other parts of the world.

It's incredibly difficult for a person to see themselves as being paranoid or to believe in a conspiracy theory. But paranoid people who believe in conspiracy theories make great tribe members. It is literally a way to make people think of things as "us vs them"

by thinkingemote

4/3/2025 at 6:34:55 AM

Priceless! Maybe you should move to the UK. Might be a job opening on the Guardian newspaper where you'd be welcomed with open arms. They think much the same about the British Conservatives and as for the new Reform Party - I guess they are beyond contempt.

by vixen99

4/2/2025 at 6:45:34 PM

[flagged]

by curiousgal

4/3/2025 at 7:40:45 AM

> The only people I have seen preaching moderation and apolitical discussion are those who voted for a particular candidate and either regret it and are too proud to admit it or are in peak cognitive dissonance.

Hello. I preach moderation and apolitical discussion. You were vague about what "particular candidate" you meant, but if you meant Trump I didn't vote for him. In fact I did not cast a vote for any presidential candidate this year because none of them was someone I wanted in office. So, you now have seen at least one person who does not match your description.

I preach moderation and apolitical discussion because the toxicity of political discussion is tearing our country in two. It is the single biggest threat our society faces today. If we cannot learn to resolve our differences (which starts with genuine attempts to reach each other even when others' actions seem reprehensible to us), this country will die. People do not, as a rule, choose evil. They are often mistaken about what is good, or disagree with each other on the best way to achieve good ends. But to round that off as "they are evil" is intellectually lazy and toxic to a civilized society.

> You cannot not discuss politics when the political scene that dictates your daily life is governed by objectively evil people and subjectively less evil people on the other side of the aisle.

If people were objectively evil, they would be considered evil by all. The fact that this has not happened is by itself proof that these people are not objectively evil, and that their evil is a matter of subjective views. If you wish to change others' views, the first step must be to recognize this so that you can formulate a plan of persuasion. Blasting people as "objectively evil" feels good, but accomplishes nothing.

by bigstrat2003

4/3/2025 at 9:33:20 AM

> I preach moderation and apolitical discussion because the toxicity of political discussion is tearing our country in two. It is the single biggest threat our society faces today. If we cannot learn to resolve our differences

No, MAGA led by Trump, assisted by the Heritage Foundation and the tech billionaire Yarvin disciples are the biggest threat, because they have power and are in the process of implementing an autocratic takeover. It's crazy to me how many moderate, apolitical people don't see this. But I was that way a few months ago and started paying attention.

> They are often mistaken about what is good, or disagree with each other on the best way to achieve good ends.

I don't think there is any agreement to be had anymore. They don't care about the Constitution, they just want a king/CEO to force things through. What can you say about a president talking about a third term, making Canada a 51st state, claiming Greenland will 100% join the US, saying allies have been ripping us off, deporting people without due process because they had suspicious looking tattoos, calling for impeachment of judges because they ruled against Trump. Refusing to pay agencies what Congress already approved. Forcing big law agencies into making deals.

Rand Paul gave a speech tonight about how the president doesn't have the power to tax the American people, which is what tariffs are. MAGA is out to win the culture and political war. Permanently. Wake up.

by goatlover

4/2/2025 at 9:36:50 PM

agreed actually, I'm not preaching moderation or apolitical-ness, I'm arguing for merely acknowledging when a view is reason-based vs tribal in nature

see my reply to rdegges

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 3:39:21 AM

[flagged]

by skellington

4/3/2025 at 3:19:59 AM

Have they eaten two plates of food and enjoyed two drinks and then announced, “I’m a proud republican and support Trump 1000%?” Because that’s what we’re getting and we’re banning neighbors and friends we’ve had for 25 years over it.

by wileydragonfly

4/3/2025 at 3:47:02 AM

I guess I just don't see "tribalism". I know it's a popular description though for the divisiveness we find ourselves in politically.

But I consider the things important to me, the beliefs, the issues: and they, all of them, align with a progressive, left-leaning ideology. I'm not just glomming on to everything one "tribe" or another stands for ... one group actually reflects everything I believe. (I think I could split a few hairs here and there, but we're still talking perhaps 95% alignment.)

But I don't think that is too surprising. Others, smarter than me, have gone into great detail about the underpinnings of left-leaning or right-leaning world views in people. Fear of change, empathy ... a number of ideas have been put forth. By this reasoning it naturally follows that those of a certain "personality" will also share common beliefs, ideologies.

The implication instead seems to be that unless you are somewhere in the middle of the spectrum you must be "tribal". That feels dismissive.

by JKCalhoun

4/3/2025 at 4:04:31 AM

My thought is that if someone aligns exactly with X political ideology, they aren’t really thinking for themselves and are just adopting whatever their tribal group believes about X subject. I see this all the time - collections of beliefs that otherwise have nothing to do with each other, but are adopted by the same people because “that’s what X group thinks about it.” This is very rarely a conscious thing.

This becomes even more obvious when you look at how these collections of beliefs have changed over time, which to me just shows how they aren’t based on any fundamental intrinsic personality traits but are trendy and groupthink-based. Ditto for geographic differences.

So I don’t think being a centrist implies one is not tribal, rather that the degree to which your beliefs on a variety of issues align with the “default” of a group implies how tribal you are.

In other words, a politically thoughtful and independent person probably has a basket of opinions that don’t fit into neat left or right, liberal or conservative, etc. categories.

by keiferski

4/3/2025 at 7:27:39 AM

Maybe one counter indication of tribalism is how often you disagree with your "tribe". I'm fairly left leaning too, but I also find myself disagreeing with a lot of left leaning policies or talking points. Maybe that's a good sign.

by yibg

4/3/2025 at 9:40:47 AM

Arguing with leftists all the time is the sure sign that you're a leftist.

(seriously, this is a significant asymmetry between the two that has been there for at least a century. There isn't one lockstep leftism, there's thousands of micro factions arguing about most things)

by pjc50

4/3/2025 at 5:28:44 PM

why do you think the political right is any different?

by engineer_22

4/3/2025 at 7:09:16 PM

the right is good at presenting a facade of cohesion. those differences are better-hidden from view until the common enemies of the right are destroyed and they need to begin eating each other.

by GuinansEyebrows

4/3/2025 at 8:18:33 AM

It's only a good sign if they're able to speak out, and aren't terrified of expressing their dissent in public.

Both the left and the right seem captured by a small minority of radicals, using social media echo chambers/purity spirals to shut down often-quite-reasonable disagreement. And we're clearly past the point at which we can just ignore 'social media politics', given how much it seems to have led to the current state of things in the US.

by bluescrn

4/3/2025 at 8:59:25 AM

At the risk of sounding pessimistic, and as someone who also identifies himself as leftist: If the end result is voting between black/white binary choices, and that act of voting is itself one of the most important self-expression, does the fact that I disagree with them in a few points matter?

by Arisaka1

4/3/2025 at 11:43:17 AM

> and that act of voting is itself one of the most important self-expression

That's what lobbyists want you to believe, at least. It makes their job a lot easier if they are the only ones carrying out democracy.

You need to select someone trustworthy enough to not botch your message, sure, but usually all political parties put up people who are trustworthy enough. What is much more important is your expression to the hired after they are on the job. That is the only way they are going to know what you are thinking. They are not mind readers, surprisingly.

by 9rx

4/3/2025 at 10:40:50 AM

>does the fact that I disagree with them in a few points matter?

Perhaps not, but you're also lending legitimacy to a system that is abusing you.

by potato3732842

4/3/2025 at 12:43:27 PM

But this isn't a board game that you can quit and go home. You are subject to your government rules regardless of if you participate or not. So it is probably better to try and get political representation that you agree with 60% of the time, rather than one you agree with 5% of the time.

by 542354234235

4/3/2025 at 4:03:15 PM

Even better is to try and get a democracy than to live life by the whims of a dictator. Getting to choose your favourite dictator is of little consolation.

by 9rx

4/3/2025 at 4:13:34 AM

this is exactly it, from here: https://www.paulgraham.com/mod.html

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 8:38:07 AM

This essay feels shallow and dismissive to me. The sentiment is that you can't be a smart, independent thinker whilst going too far left or right. As with many of his essays, my take is that PG - who lives a highly privileged life - is basing this opinion on the caricature of reality that he gleans from the media and internet forums. It's easy to think what he thinks when the only representation you see of the far left is mindless "woke"ism.

Firstly, does he think that Marx was dumb? And leading left-wing figures like AOC, Sanders, Varoufakis, Zinn, or Zizek? No, for all you might disagree with them, they're smart and independent. They did not acquire their opinions in bulk. I even admit that right-wing figures like Shapiro, Bannon etc... are smart and independent, even though I think they're snakes.

Secondly, the essay overstates the degree of uniformity within the far left and right. Have you not seen the animosity between anarchists and Trotskyites? They only agree insofar as believing we can do better than capitalism. And those on the far right who have a global free market ideology will be at odds with those who want to restrict movement and apply protectionist tariffs.

[EDITED TO ADD] Thirdly, he presupposes that the distinction between right and left is purely one of logical competence. This is captured by him saying "both sides are equally wrong". But personal values also drive the polarisation. Those on the right tend to highly value tradition, loyalty, and family. Those on the left tend to highly value universal welfare and the environment. It's not really possible to label these "right" or "wrong", they are expressions of our fundamental desires for ourselves and the world. If you start from different axioms, you'll tend to get different corollaries even if perfect logic is applied.

by n4r9

4/3/2025 at 9:10:07 AM

It's the technocratic or perhaps "enlightened centrist" tribe. There's similar vibe in the post, and even though there's some introspection about the author's own tribe, he doesn't seem to question whether his political thinking could be tribal.

It's indeed typical for this tribe to off-hand dismiss thinking that they deem somehow "ideological" without even really trying to figure out what the thinking is. Also a lot of self-congratulation, exceptionalism and motivated reasoning is exhibited, but these are typical features of any tribe.

by jampekka

4/3/2025 at 9:21:52 AM

You are describing the problem of getting a picture of a party or movement from media and without interacting with them.

by rightbyte

4/3/2025 at 9:56:37 AM

That could explain the second issue I describe. Maybe the first. But I do not think he has such an excuse for the third.

by n4r9

4/3/2025 at 12:04:13 PM

Ye sure the third point is a attempt to differentiate left and right on a fundamental level.

If I were to do that, I would say something like "pull the ladder up behind you or tear it down before you" with a comical touch. I don't think it is possible to keep such descriptions short or stringent.

by rightbyte

4/3/2025 at 10:38:45 AM

>In other words, a politically thoughtful and independent person probably has a basket of opinions that don’t fit into neat left or right, liberal or conservative, etc. categories.

That doesn't stop them from voting a straight red or blue ticket every time if that's what they've been indoctrinated to do.

We've all encountered some old man who by all accounts should be a republican. They own a small business, have conservative social views, like their guns, minimize taxes, etc, etc. But they vote a straight blue ticket because that's what they learned to do back in the 1960s. And on the other side is the stereotypical southern white woman who believes in every social thing the democratic party has but still votes red because she was raised in a religious household and came of age during the peak of the right's lean toward peddling to christians.

by potato3732842

4/3/2025 at 10:45:47 PM

This is such a great contrast:

> But they vote a straight blue ticket because that's what they learned to do back in the 1960s.

and

> but still votes red because she was raised in a religious household and came of age during the peak of the right's lean toward peddling to christians.

There's no explanation for why the old man votes "blue" other than he learned it in the 60s. OTOH, the woman votes "red" because "she was raised in a religious household" and started voting when The Right was "peddling to christians".

"peddling" -- that's a pretty negative term.

I don't know if it's ironic or demonstrative that an article about how difficult it can be to have political conversations produces a comment thread with such biased viewpoints.

by brightlancer

4/3/2025 at 11:02:11 AM

Sure, but to be fair, we’re talking about political discussions and not strictly voting behavior. It seems like a given to me that most voting behavior is only a vague approximation of what people actually think and want.

by keiferski

4/3/2025 at 4:40:48 AM

At the risk of sounding very arrogant, I've found this incredibly obvious even when I was just 18 years old. Decades have passed, plenty of my beliefs have changed, but this one hasn't.

The chance that one "ideology", whether it's liberalism, conservatism, anarchism , fascism or any-ism is always the right answer to every single societal question, is 0. It's comparable to the idea of exactly 1 of the (tens of) thousands of religions being the true one, correct in everything, with all of the others being wrong.

And this extends to politics. Where I'm from, the political landscape is very different from the US, with at least 5+ different parties that support different policies in various ways. At the same time, it's similar - there isn't a single one that approaches things on a case-by-case basis, each of them being ideology-based.

> So I don’t think being a centrist implies one is not tribal, rather that the degree to which your beliefs on a variety of issues align with the “default” of a group implies how tribal you are.

Absolutely, "centrism" is an ideology in itself. This is also why the usage of the word "moderate" in the article and by PG is very unfortunate. That word too comes with a whole lot of baggage, and saying that independent thought leads to one being "moderate" in the way that most people think of that word, is straight up wrong. We need a different word, but I'm not great at coining those. "pragmatic" is the best one I can come up with. I can feel a "pragmatism is an ideology!" coming, but "the ideology of not looking at things from an ideological perspective" is entirely different from anything else. I'm sure the bright minds here can give better words.

> In other words, a politically thoughtful and independent person probably has a basket of opinions that don’t fit into neat left or right, liberal or conservative, etc. categories.

Very much so. And as the article points out, this is unfortunately a very lonely experience, so it's completely logical that most don't opt for this, instead choosing the warmth of a dogmatic community.

by jjani

4/3/2025 at 4:50:14 AM

Funny that you say pragmatic, because that’s exactly the word I tend to use when describing my own political beliefs. The best that I have come up with is “pragmatic with a propensity for…” and a few sub-categories that more accurately define what I’d like to see politically happen.

For example - preventionism. It seems to me that many issues could be avoided or eliminated entirely if we tried to prevent them from happening in the first place, rather than choosing between two actions, both with unavoidable negative consequences.

Another is aesthetics. For some reason, the simple desire to make public spaces more beautiful is not really a policy position adopted by any political group, at least in a primary way.

And so maybe the solution is an issue-based political system in which votes and resources go toward specific issues and not parties. (Or work toward eliminating those issues in the first place.)

by keiferski

4/3/2025 at 6:03:46 AM

Some states such as California have a non-partisan ballot proposition where citizens can vote directly on issues. It generally works fine, although it's not clear whether the net impact has really been positive.

by nradov

4/3/2025 at 11:57:26 AM

On the one hand it defeated affirmative action repeatedly in one of the most left wing states, on the other proposition 13 created a class of landed gentry and permanently screwed the state’s tax base.

by barry-cotter

4/3/2025 at 8:43:17 AM

[dead]

by facile2323

4/3/2025 at 5:00:57 AM

PG has two different terms for it in his essay: unintentional moderates vs intentional moderates

https://www.paulgraham.com/mod.html

That's what represents the two circled areas in the graph, though I realize if people don't have that context it could be confusing

added an explanation to clear things up

fwiw, I don't think that's arrogant, I've met plenty of high schoolers that understand this concept

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 8:44:59 AM

[dead]

by facile2323

4/3/2025 at 1:37:33 PM

> saying that independent thought leads to one being "moderate" in the way that most people think of that word, is straight up wrong

Agreed. Independent thought usually leads to one being moderate when that person is already living a comfortable life.

by rafaeltorres

4/3/2025 at 10:20:58 AM

You’ve hit the nail on the head. The platforms of political parties are amalgamations of specific interests and agendas, and not necessarily a cohesive world view born of an aligned set of principles. Most (all) political parties have positions that conflict logically, spiritually, or practically. Yes, that includes your preferred party on the right or left.

So anyone who’s views align perfectly with a party are probably just parroting what they’ve heard because no sensible individual would arrive at that set of values naturally on their own; it would - and does - take some serious mental gymnastics to hold these contradictory values in your head.

by nkrisc

4/3/2025 at 1:16:54 PM

You're correct. Most people's views (i.e. moderates) are ideologically inconsistent with party-line. The loud X/bsky types refuse to decouple, and will double down even if the facts are wrong. Mind you on social media blue-tribe is much further left than the Democratic party.

by lanfeust6

4/3/2025 at 12:22:09 PM

You don't have to consider yourself part of a tribe. Others will consider you anyway.

You are a man or a woman, young or old, Asian, White, Black, Latino, straight, gay, rich, poor slim, fat, etc.

by DeathArrow

4/3/2025 at 12:58:54 PM

The technical terms for the first few in that list are sexism, ageism and racism. While it is true people do that, it is considered a bad idea because it doesn't capture reality in a productive and meaningful way. And doesn't seem relevant to keiferski's comment.

The aim should be that people have to voluntarily associate with their tribe. It might be the hermit tribe where all the hermits sign up to be alone together.

by roenxi

4/3/2025 at 9:35:17 AM

To be fair, I've rarely seen a group fighting itself more than the progressive left. If tribalism truly exists, it exists mostly on the right.

by thrance

4/3/2025 at 11:53:37 AM

Right but that’s because there are more micro interests on the left. It’s still tribal though. If I start to bring up deregulation of building housing, there will be a strong immediate backlash by certain factions on the left. I see it more that there is little room for discussion, within these different groups there are only binary options and if you are with them on all talking points, well you are the enemy.

by infecto

4/3/2025 at 5:17:43 PM

> If I start to bring up deregulation of building housing, there will be a strong immediate backlash by certain factions on the left.

I do suspect that if you what the deregulation actually meant to both left and right people you'd find two (probably overlapping) camps aligned on NIMBY and Housing prices go up as your largest groups.

Structural and safety engineers regardless of political affiliation will tell you why deregulation of some standards is a bad idea.

by pixl97

4/3/2025 at 3:00:40 PM

Emotional investment is a subtly different issue to package-deal opinions.

by n4r9

4/3/2025 at 7:56:52 AM

I once read an interesting article that said in multipolar political systems, coalitions between opinion groups happen after the election; whereas in two-party systems, the coalition forms before the election.

So you get people who think taxation is theft allied with people who Back The Blue. You get people who think life is so sacred abortion should be banned allied with people who'd like to see an AR-15 under every pillow. You get people who think nazi flags and the N word are free speech, allied with people who think books with gay and trans characters should be banned.

And personally I'm pro-environment and think nuclear power has a part to play; I think we should help the homeless by increasing the housing supply and letting builders do their thing; that the police should exist but need substantial reform to stamp out corruption and brutality; and that women's issues like abortion and trans women in abuse shelters should be decided by women, not men like me. But I'm in a political coalition with people who think nuclear power is bad, that we need rent control, that we should defund the police, and so on.

In an electoral system with proportional representation, largely unrelated views would all be different parties, no party would have a majority, and after the election they'd form alliances to build a ruling coalition.

But because of America's electoral system, someone has to take all those views, duct-tape them together and call it a consistent political ideology.

by michaelt

4/3/2025 at 8:45:05 AM

This is a very interesting take, and I agree with your perspective.

I think the "anti-woke" messaging was a particularly effective example, because in reality this means completely different things to many voters (some of those contradictory).

Your nuclear position is interesting, and has become significantly more common over the last decade I feel. Personally, I disagree-- In my view, nuclear power is not on a trajectory where it is ever gonna be competitive (levelized cost) with renewable power. This will lead to renewables "ruining" electricity spot prices whenever they are available which is very bad for nuclear power economics. Nuclear power also shares basically the same drawback with renewables that it wants to be paired with peaker plants for dispatchability (instead of operating in load-following mode itself), but renewables basically just do it cheaper.

At this point, it would basically take a miracle for me to believe in nuclear power again (a very cheap, safe, simple, clean, quick-to-build reactor design) but I don't see this happening any time soon (and honestly the exact same argument applies to fusion power even more strongly-- I think that is an interesting research direction that will never find major a application in power generation).

I will concede however that nuclear power that was built 10-30 years ago (before renewables were really competitive) was and is helpful to reduce CO2 emissions.

by myrmidon

4/3/2025 at 12:48:50 PM

> But I'm in a political coalition with people who think nuclear power is bad, that we need rent control, that we should defund the police, and so on.

I don't think that's true though. I think you're just listening to the loudest voices.

by JKCalhoun

4/3/2025 at 4:08:42 PM

Not even the loudest voices. Biden said "fund the police" at a State of the Union address. The people with the most power and influence within the left wing of US politics are not in support of defunding the police.

by UncleMeat

4/3/2025 at 8:26:46 AM

> that women's issues like abortion and trans women in abuse shelters should be decided by women, not men like me.

This got me wondering... Thinking in reverse, are there any issues that you think should be decided by men only?

Underlying your thought, seems to be the idea that some people should be excluded from certain political/ideological conversations.

Whereas for me, I see all people as individuals, each with a right to their opinions. Ie, I wouldn't start from a point of separation as this bakes in special interests, sexism, racism, etc.

by verisimi

4/3/2025 at 12:59:45 PM

> This got me wondering... Thinking in reverse, are there any issues that you think should be decided by men only?

Access to viagra?

by techpineapple

4/3/2025 at 8:50:02 AM

>This got me wondering... Thinking in reverse, are there any issues that you think should be decided by men only?

Military conscription and field duties would be an example I can think of.

For example, in my European country we have mandatory conscription for men over 17 but there was a referendum a while ago if this should still be kept, and it was funny that women also got to vote on whether men get conscripted or not lol. And guess what, most women (and boomers) voted in favor of the mandatory conscription of young males by quite a margin and unsurprisingly the only ones who voted against but got outvoted, were the young men.

by FirmwareBurner

4/3/2025 at 9:48:04 AM

Yes this discriminates, but your example illustrates the exact reverse way to what I meant. Being subject to conscription is like a negative right/loss of rights - men are being forced to potentially put their lives on the line. Can you think of a female equivalent where females are ordered by the government to put themselves in harm's way?

In both cases it seems like the discrimination is not in favour of men. Apparently men ought not to get a say in "women's issues", but it is also right that men be forced to put their lives on the line.

If that is correct, it is the case that men have less rights.

by verisimi

4/3/2025 at 10:13:18 AM

They answered your question "are there any issues that you think should be decided by men only?"

In this sentence, you are looking at different parts of the equation depending on case 1 and 2:

> Apparently men ought not to get a say in "women's issues", but it is also right that men be forced to put their lives on the line.

No, in the first case it could be argued that men shouldn't have a say, and in the second it could be argued that women shouldn't have a say. In the first case women are (potentially/allegedly) negative affected, in the second (young) men.

> Can you think of a female equivalent where females are ordered by the government to put themselves in harm's way?

Anti-Abortion laws in the US would be such an example.

by dubbel

4/3/2025 at 10:09:10 AM

If absolute gender equality is what we're after, I think the premise is flawed form the start.

Men have less rights by nature/biology because they are expendable (women are the reproductory bottleneck of the species) and they are the only gender with the physique optimized for physical fighting and hard labor, hence the famous line "women and children first".

We can say it's unfair and imbalanced but that's not gonna change biology and the status quo when push comes to shove and an enemy invades or a natural disaster hits and human meat is needed for the grinder, hence why there's no sympathy towards men and why much less societal help available to men in need (men have 10x the suicide and homelessness rates than women).

Men and women can never be equal in absolute terms outside an utopia of peace and prosperity, because evolutionary biology and gender dysmorphia has engineered our bodies to be good at completely different tasks meant to complement each other in order to ensure the survival and procreation of the tribe/species.

by FirmwareBurner

4/3/2025 at 10:50:48 AM

> If absolute gender equality is what we're after, I think the premise is flawed form the start.

I thought we were talking about some sort of equality. Re the OP, who mentioned that they wouldn't participate in certain "women's issues", I couldn't think of an equivalent example where women shouldn't participate in "men's issues". That fact alone strikes me as unequal - it can't be that one sex (or race, or whatever other distinction) should have rights in law, that others don't have. Such a circumstance would an example of creating inequality, which I think is the antithesis of the OP's point.

These questions are not straightforward. Presumably we don't want to initiate or institutionalise inequality.

by verisimi

4/3/2025 at 8:00:39 AM

this is probably my favorite comment on this post so far, super interesting

if you can find the article I'd love to read it

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 8:11:16 AM

[flagged]

by netsharc

4/3/2025 at 9:43:04 AM

[flagged]

by pjc50

4/3/2025 at 12:45:05 PM

> The anti-abortion people do not care about actual outcomes. There's no interest in safer obstetrics or early years care or preventing school shootings, they're hyper-focused only on abortion.

That is consistent with the position. School shootings are explicitly banned and there'd be a strong consensus that obstetrics should be done to a high standard.

Someone has to draw a line between sperm and human for when the anti-murder laws kick in. The line is fundamentally arbitrary except for 2 logical points (moment of conception and actual birth [0]) that are broadly unpopular choices. It is certainly easy to disagree with any particular line choice but it is all but impossible to rank them theoretically except by letting the political process play out.

[0] Theoretically we could even find a third one and draw the line some time significantly after birth when awareness really starts to build up; but that is a can of worms no-one wants to open because babies are very lovable and probably protected by hard-coded emotions built up from evolutionary pressure.

by roenxi

4/3/2025 at 1:53:59 PM

It's really simple to me:

- abortion should only be allowed if needed because of health or exceptional cases like rape - abortion should not be used as a form of birth control, use condoms or the morning-after pill

I'm fine with states deciding the details. I think it should be mandated that it's always allowed when health is in danger (I believe this is already true), and it should be mandated that even if a state allows abortion "just by choice" (so, as birth control), it should definitely not be allowed after 9 months even.

> The anti-abortion people do not care about actual outcomes.

I'm anti-abortion, but I really, really do care about outcomes. So if you want to discuss this with me, I'd love to.

-

> You get people who think life is so sacred abortion should be banned allied with people who'd like to see an AR-15 under every pillow

I don't understand the problem with this... Not wanting to kill unborn life but still wanting to be able to protect yourself and your family when someone breaks into your house.

It's statements like this that make me question the intellectual honesty of people. It doesn't take much thinking to understand it, right?

by jeffhuys

4/3/2025 at 2:56:57 PM

> I don't understand the problem with this... Not wanting to kill unborn life but still wanting to be able to protect yourself and your family when someone breaks into your house.

The point (as I understood it) isn't that they're incompatible, the point is that they're disparate beliefs and one doesn't necessary imply the other, but our political system treats them as if they do. There simply is no party for people who support abortion and gun control or for people who oppose abortion but like guns, but there are people with those beliefs.

by itishappy

4/3/2025 at 3:02:34 PM

Oh, like that! Yeah, fully agree. This is one of the reasons the conspiracy theory "they both answer to the same group of overlords" is so big. I still wish I lived in America, though.

by jeffhuys

4/3/2025 at 3:20:42 PM

> It's statements like this that make me question the intellectual honesty of people. It doesn't take much thinking to understand it, right?

It isn't a matter of intellectual honesty. People who think assault rifles should be banned don't necessarily believe that you shouldn't be able to protect yourself. (It doesn't take much thinking to understand that, right?)

The issues are much more complicated and intertwined than people are willing to deal with, making it easy to fall back on a couple simple ideas like "don't kill unborn life" and "let me have an AR-15 to protect myself." But when you start digging into the ramifications of unwanted children, the social programs required to support them, the impact on the parents, etc.; and what it means to let every tom/dick/harry own and carry whatever weapon they want, even if there's a background check and mandatory training; you get into details for which there is no clear best, or even good, solution. We do have reality to deal with.

People only have so much energy to spend on understanding issues that don't affect them personally, and different people are affected by different issues. So of course there will be wide gaps between perspectives and how those perspectives are expressed. That doesn't mean anyone is being intellectually dishonest.

by unbalancedevh

4/3/2025 at 5:21:50 PM

Typically with this view

>I don't understand the problem with this... Not wanting to kill unborn life

The people in question have zero scientific understanding of what's entailed here which leads to states like Texas where doctors let pregnant women die rather than risk being charged by the Christian Nationalist state.

These issues are nuanced and complex and require actual understanding rather than short political quips and people yelling "of course it's simple".

by pixl97

4/3/2025 at 4:41:53 PM

[flagged]

by notastrawman

4/3/2025 at 3:57:04 AM

The graph in the article of "what the political spectrum actually is" where independent thought was only found in the middle was so funny to me that I had to do a double take. Maybe this is a joke or April Fool's prank or something?

I read the article quickly so maybe I'm misreading it but if that graph is serious it really undermines his position as a thoughtful moderate to me. But maybe he really does believe that everyone on the left and the right only has groupthink. I agree with you that it's definitely not all tribalism

by tdb7893

4/3/2025 at 4:07:00 AM

European here. I'm on the left, but I don't hang out much with people from the left: they're really often driven by ideology and cannot for the life of them come up with working political plans to push the needle. They're completely rejecting the complexity of compromise and gradual change towards the ideal, convinced that any act that isn't absolute is a betrayal of their values.

by rf15

4/3/2025 at 4:17:14 AM

Sure I mean a lot of people on every political leaning don't have practical policies but that's besides the point (people can even have bad independent thoughts so impractical policies aren't inherently relevant). The graph isn't even "often people who disagree with me are tribal" it's "literally only some people near me ideologically are independent thinkers".

Edit: this is the graph, everything outside of a group of moderates is 100% on the "groupthink" side of the graph. It's an inherently condescending way to look at people who you disagree with and a disservice to your point if you're trying to get people to listen to each other. https://images.spr.so/cdn-cgi/imagedelivery/j42No7y-dcokJuNg...

by tdb7893

4/3/2025 at 4:50:42 AM

I think you're taking the graph way too literally.

The Republicans and Democrats are both coalitions made up of many different groups, and their policies are constantly shifting depending on which individuals get elected and which of those sub-groups hold more power, as well as due to different sub-groups shifting allegiances.

It's statistically almost impossible that someone would agree 100% with the platform of the Republicans or Democrats at any given moment. Even if you just pretend there are exactly two stances on a given issue (R or D) you'd still be looking at like 2^1000 different possible outcomes (for 1,000 different issues). The more perfectly someone claims to align to one party, the more likely it is that they're doing so out of tribalism than because they actually matched the exact one-in-a-zillion set of opinions.

by bodiekane

4/3/2025 at 5:08:28 AM

The graph isn't "agrees with Republican" and "agrees with Democrat" as the axis (I also would say you can agree with people and still be a free thinker, viewing positions as independent doesn't really make sense, there's underlying ideology that heavily correlates them but all of this is besides the point). The idea that the far left is agreeing dogmatically with the democratic platform is clearly factually incorrect to anyone who has met people actually on the far left (they rarely even agree with other people on the far left) and a similar thing can be said about the far right.

The really obvious example of this is look how much of a thorn in the side of the Republican Congressional leadership the far right has been. Agreeing rigidly with a party will not put you at the edge of the graphs at all (for most parties globally it would put you somewhere in the middle)

by tdb7893

4/3/2025 at 5:39:01 AM

The graph X axis could just as well have been labelled "agrees with Republicans" and "agrees with Democrats"; perhaps it would've been clearer that way. But really, any polarization axis would've worked.

The ideal graph would have two opposing labels dynamically generated according to the beliefs of the reader to be along a polarization axis for which the reader exists in the middle.

by oasisaimlessly

4/3/2025 at 4:35:43 PM

It's not just that the axes are wrong, there's a fundamental problem with the idea of the graph in an article about considering viewpoints and overcoming tribalism. Fundamentally the author put a graph in the article about tribalism and not considering other views where only people close to him ideologically are "free thinkers" (it's especially weird since "free thinkers" are congregated where most people are). You can sorta see this problem with the rest of the article, there are a lot of claims about how other people think badly and how he thinks is good. This is his perogative but it makes the article deeply insular and not really about how to understand and reason with other people.

It's particularly frustrating to me since from my experience I think both sides thinking he is farther away ideologically than he is is from then is from this tendency. I have the opposite problem, people generally think I'm much closer ideologically than I am even though I'm uncompromising in my principles (I'm very far left and even a vegan, which is anathema to many people). I've found if I listen to people and, more importantly, am willing to understand and speak to their values the more my experience is the exact opposite of the writer's. People's political views are often irrational but also they are driven by a diverse set of underlying ideologies and values and if you think "independent thought" is going to cluster in particular spot in an ideological spectrum and everyone else is just subject to groupthink (but you aren't somehow) then of course talking to other people who aren't ideologically close to you is going to be miserable.

by tdb7893

4/3/2025 at 5:04:03 AM

Even more so when you see how quickly these coalitions will shift their beliefs or take on new beliefs when they’re signaled to do so by leaders of the coalition.

You often see this in real time during political conversations (both online and offline). Someone will say, “No one on my side ever said X, that’s a vicious smear perpetrated by the other side.” Someone will response with an example of a prominent leader on their side saying X. The first person will suddenly do a 180, and start explaining why X is just a commonsense position and it’s silly for anyone to be offended by it.

by gonzobonzo

4/3/2025 at 11:07:53 AM

AI's ability to sift through text is almost to the point of being able to pick out these idiots so they can be ignored.

We're not too far off from a future where anyone can mouse over their username and a browser extension will tell them whether the username they are mousing over is consistent in their beliefs or if they're a flip flopping POS shill for whatever color party they're peddling the policy of.

by potato3732842

4/3/2025 at 10:11:21 AM

This is why I don't talk politics with anybody I respect. It would quickly make me a misanthrope.

by lupusreal

4/3/2025 at 4:55:49 AM

[flagged]

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 7:20:48 AM

This. 100%

Same behaviour, or should we call it helplessness, can be witnessed in democrats responses since this whole thing went into round 2.

I'm shocked on how little actionable and constructive goals are part of the "conversation".

by whiteboardr

4/3/2025 at 7:30:04 AM

I think you're talking about a subtly different thing. OP was simply saying "it's very possible to be a rational independent thinker and yet be non-centrist". What you're saying is "a lot of people I've met who are more left than me are impractical".

Relating to your point, I would add something based on my experience in the UK. In the last 30 years we've twice had a Labour leader elected. Both times campaigning as a hard-nosed centre-left pragmatist, and with some on the left echoing similar sentiments about compromise and pushing the needle.

Blair admittedly did some good stuff - Lords reform and minimum wage. But he also introduced and then tripled university fees, greatly expanded private initiatives in the public sector, and engaged in an activist interventionist foreign policy culminating in the invasion of Iraq. These are changes whose ill effects we're still reeling from as a country.

Starmer is looking to shape up very similarly, from his U-turns on private school charitable status, tuition fees and the two-child cap, to his reluctance to condemn the Gazan genocide and cuts to disability allowance.

Was it better to have these as prime minister Vs the conservative candidate? Yes, probably. Can they really be said to be pushing the needle? I doubt it.

by n4r9

4/3/2025 at 7:15:29 AM

American here. Otherwise, fairly similar.

Not saying that our right is much better. Their top "virtue" seems to be competent campaigning & hard work in pursuit of political power. (Which, obviously, worked for them.) Vs. our left seems too busy holding low-effort ideological purity beauty contests to particularly care about being in power.

I've heard that some of the brighter voters, who voted for Democrats due to "Trump is the worst choice" arguments, are waking up to just how low-functioning the Dem's are. Not saying that that'll do any good - but it's nice to hear.

by bell-cot

4/3/2025 at 7:15:04 AM

> They're completely rejecting the complexity of compromise and gradual change towards the ideal, convinced that any act that isn't absolute is a betrayal of their values.

Interestingly enough, this also describes a member of the Trump Party (formerly known as the Republican Party).

by rob74

4/3/2025 at 4:13:14 AM

it was meant as a visual specifically for Paul Graham's article here: https://www.paulgraham.com/mod.html

I should probably generate a new one or just remove since it appears to have sent this message to multiple people

But yeah I don't think it's entirely tribalism, but I do largely agree with PG's essay, though I'd understand a contesting of his statement that "the left and right are equally wrong about half the time"

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 5:13:07 AM

But which is it? Do you agree with Graham's essay and your own graph, or do you disagree?

It sounds like you believe in the graph, but don't want to turn people off. Just own your belief.

FWIW I think you should disagree with Graham's essay and your own graph. Saying that "left" and "right" were both 50% wrong is like saying the same about "federalist" and "anti-federalist". Even if the sides are 50% wrong, the free thinkers would be widely distributed.

by shawndrost

4/3/2025 at 5:54:05 AM

Ironically this seems like an example of the tribalism my essay is about -- I agree with his essay, but only partially agree with the graph

I think the hump could be slightly shifted left or right, but the points on the graph are the averages of an individual's entire collection of views

I don't believe an independent thinker would come up with a set of views that perfectly match the left or right's doctrine since at least some of those views are somewhat arbitrary -- in that sense I agree with him

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 9:39:00 AM

There are also centrist doctrines. Even explicit ones like the radical centrism.

A major problem is trying to project a hugely multifaceted phenomenon like political outlook into one, or even few, dimensions. And then even discretizing the one dimension. And then categorizing (other) people's thinking or ideologies into these.

Another problem is assuming that there is some universal "optimal" or even good policy. Instead there can be even fundamentally contradicting interests or goals between e.g., dare I say, classes which can lead to well informed

I'm not claiming you don't appreciate these, but the conclusions to me seem to require such problematic assumptions. The intent is likely something like trying to simplify complex phenomena into something manageable (i.e. an ideology), but these tend to be very leaky abstractions.

by jampekka

4/3/2025 at 7:11:26 AM

I think the issue might stem from the fact that (as I read it) the essay is talking about "for the people who are moderate (in the middle of the left/right axis), some are distributed higher on your graph, while some are lower". Which says nothing about "for the people who are distributed higher on the graph, how many are in the middle of the left/right axis". Your graph makes explicit an answer to the second question which the essay avoids. (There is a bit of an implication in the last two paragraphs, but PG is explicit it's only about people he knows).

by duffmancd

4/3/2025 at 6:54:58 AM

You even say so in your essay. I'd say an issue is people picking up on the graph but ignoring what you wrote.

by hgomersall

4/3/2025 at 6:48:17 AM

I don't think the graph agrees with the essay.

In the essay, the "unintentional moderate" is defined as someone who holds all kinds of views, some from the far left, some from the far right, some from the middle - but by chance the average of their views makes them a moderate.

I had to go looking for that, because the graph doesn't show that at all. I think the graph is a bad take on the ideas in Paul Graham's article.

by leoedin

4/3/2025 at 4:23:04 AM

I read that I think he means it is tribal thinking if you have a desire to convince instead of search for truth in a curious way.

I didnt read that people on the left or the right are always tribal. But yeah, its easy to go that way when you are not able to see the truth in opposite viewpoints.

by trinsic2

4/3/2025 at 5:42:49 AM

Yes, you're misreading it. Independent thought vs. groupthink is the vertical axis.

by musicale

4/3/2025 at 4:20:51 PM

What he means is that according to the graph if you call yourself an "independent thinker" then you can't be an extremist. You are automatically a centrist. All the dots on the "independent thinker" half are all centrist. None are left or right. An interesting bias that he's admitting to. Made me roll my eyes and stop reading right there, and just skim the rest for all the "independent thinker" tropes.

If you want to feel superior and virtue signal, just label yourself an "independent thinker." It's so easy.

by Lendal

4/3/2025 at 7:43:26 AM

It's common in tribalism to see ones own tribe as rational and the other tribes as groupthink.

We can see this in discussions about misinformation today. "Brainwashed masses" is a tribal concept about a tribe.

by thinkingemote

4/3/2025 at 1:01:50 PM

Yes, that also struck me as nonsensical.

If he were really trying to demonstrate a 2d Gaussian, it would instead be a circle or elipse of points with highest density at the origin.

perhaps in the end he was not

by chromatin

4/3/2025 at 4:41:21 AM

It's not uncommon for people who decide they have "discovered" the "real political spectrum" by simply adding a new axis to the traditional left-right spectrum to coincidentally idealize one pole on that new axis, viewing all variation on the left-right axis as indicative of distraction from what is important.

Asserting that people varying on the left-right spectrum also cluster around the anti-ideal pole of the idealized axis while everyone closer to the ideal pole clusters around the left-right center is not as common, but reflects the same cognitive bias, though it is particularly amusing when that axis independent thought (ideal) vs. groupthink (anti-ideal), such that freethinkers are asserted to by ideological uniform even outside of the shared commit to "free" thought, while sheepish adherents of groupthink are more ideologically diverse.

(And, yes, that graph is deadly serious -- as well as, IMO, hilariously wrong [0] -- and fairly central to the theme of the post.)

It's even more funny that this "free thinker" is decrying tribalist groupthink, asserting (as already discussed) that free thought exists only in an extremely narrow band in the center of the left-right axis, and talking about how they can't talk politics with anyone outside their group and are "desperate for like-minded folk". The lack of self-awareness is...palpable.

It's even more funny that all the ideas he embraces and purports to have trouble finding people he agrees with are the standard doctrines of the rationalist/EA/longermist faction that is so popular in the tech/AI space (and the conceit of being uniquely free thinking is also common to the faction.)

[0] Actual free thinkers are, IME, distributed widely -- not necessarily evenly, but certainly not clustered in one spot -- across both the left-right axis and a number of other political axes [1][2], such as the authoritarian-libertarian axis, so both the distribution shown and the assertion that the "real" political spectrum is two dimensional with only freethought vs. groupthink added to the classic left-right axis are incorrect.

[1] For a number of reasons, including both differences in life experiences and thus perceived probabilities on various factual propositions, but also on fundamental values which life experiences may impact, but not in a deductive manner, because you can't reason to "ought" from "is".

[2] Free thinkers do differ from groupthinkers in that their positions in the multidimensional space of political values are likely not to fall into the clusters of established tribes, but to have some views typical of one tribe while other others fall out of that tribes typical space (and possibly even into the space of an opposing tribe.) But there are enough different tribes

by dragonwriter

4/3/2025 at 4:49:09 AM

posting my explanation of the graph from another comment here

"it was meant as a visual specifically for Paul Graham's article here: https://www.paulgraham.com/mod.html

I should probably generate a new one or just remove since it appears to have sent this message to multiple people

But yeah I don't think it's entirely tribalism, but I do largely agree with PG's essay, though I'd understand a contesting of his statement that 'the left and right are equally wrong about half the time'"

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 5:39:04 AM

One quality of “tribal” that I think gets overlooked is that those that are part of a “tribe” are not willing to be wrong.

I feel like those that are more in the middle - in addition to be “accidentally in the middle” as pg says — they’re open to hearing the other side, and even open to being wrong.

Those that I know that I might define as “tribal” — and that goes for either side — are certainly not open to being wrong, and not even really open to listening to the other side — even a rational discussion.

Some may pretend to listen and maybe even engage in a discussion, but only out of being polite, not out of genuine, open curiosity.

by jader201

4/3/2025 at 12:00:57 PM

The most visible example of tribalism is when groups fail to update their ideas and beliefs as facts start to come in. You can't escape the religious parallel.

This occurs clear across the political spectrum, but a standout example is record-breaking levels of immigration in European countries like Sweden and Germany. Instead of realizing the policy failure and acting to fix it, the line becomes "it was the right thing to do, it was just done poorly."

by subpixel

4/3/2025 at 7:37:07 AM

It's natural to internalise the groups we belong to. In other words they become me. Or my identity is formed by the group.

When social scientists say something is socially constructed that's approaching this.

It's hard to see oneself apart from the group one belongs to. In fact to separate oneself causes real pain. In the article it says that people don't want to look outside their tribe; I would say that people shouldn't even think about looking outside as it will cause trauma. It would literally cause psychological identity wounds.

One aspect of politics is this pain avoidance.

by thinkingemote

4/3/2025 at 4:21:32 AM

By definition, reason can only take you so far in politics, as it’s the arena in which decisions must be made without complete information. No matter how well reasoned your arguments, no matter how well informed you are, you’re still going to resist switching allegiances. So, imo, politics is just about 99% loyalty.

by wwarner

4/3/2025 at 11:33:34 AM

Looking at it from a left-right one-dimensional space, the middle would be the non-tribal choice. The political spectrum is however not a one-dimensional space, and countries with multiple political parties, with center parties, can demonstrate that well in polls and self tests. It is perfectly possible for a single individual to be in 50% agreement with every single political party, from left, center and right, agreeing to the individual policies from each party that they find to be correct and disagreeing with policies they disagree with.

As it happens, if I personally looks to what is important to me, I find that from the extremest left to the extremest right, the best political party get 60% support and the worst get 40% support. They all have some policies that I strongly support, and some policies that are terrible, and the middle of the gang is exactly the same.

To take an example. I am in strong support of the green party when it comes to train and bike infrastructure, fishing policies, eliminating lead in hunting ammunition, getting rid of invasive species, and banning heavy fuel oil in shipping. I strongly disagree with their support of using natural gas as a transactional fuel in the energy grid in hopes of green hydrogen (a pipe dream), and their dismantling of nuclear power. I also strongly disagree with their political attempts to mix in the war in Gaza with environmentalism, as if taking up the flag for either side in that war has any relevance in nation/local politics on what is almost the other side of the world. That is one political party out of 8 that my country has, and the story is similar with all the rest.

by belorn

4/3/2025 at 6:19:14 PM

Looking at this as a non-American. American politics is seems very much tribe minded as an outsider,left vs right. And where someone stands largely can tell you about their views on a lot of other things. At least that's how it is portrayed in media. I know in practice a lot of people are more nuanced.

Most countries have sometimes up to 10 political parties and what party/ies someone supports often does not say much about their views on different social issues. In the USA it seems you can't want a secure border and civil rights for minority groups.

by duckduckquaquak

4/3/2025 at 1:09:51 PM

I think there sadly exists an overlay in a lot of politics, basically tribalism, but I think the better phrasing is "teams" as in "team sports".

You don't like a team for an ideological reason, usually physical closeness or some other arbitrary connection.

For many, the team is the extent at which they analyze politics. You see this when conservatives will reference historical events in terms of the name of the political party. For example, it's relatively common to see someone say "Oh the Democrats are bad because during the Civil war they were on the side of slavery". Their analysis doesn't include the actual policy or ideology at hand, it's simply the team "Democrats". It doesn't matter to them if the flavor of policies that the early 20th century dems supported are similar or even the same as the policies modern Republicans support. Only the team.

I think there exists multiple layers of "tribalism" or "team sports" in politics that effects people differently. The bottom layer is sadly "<Name of party> good, <name of other party> bad". I think at some point we must acknowledge that some people are simply stupid. If they think making an argument based on the politics of a party 100 years ago is convincing, they might just not have the facilities for critical thinking.

A lot of those people are now @-ing grok on twitter to explain even the simplest of jokes.

by MSFT_Edging

4/3/2025 at 5:03:49 PM

Thanks, I came here to say the same. Sports fandom is the better metaphor.

It’s lazy participation.

by Isamu

4/3/2025 at 6:37:00 AM

Is it really likely that an intelligent person like yourself could hold 95% intellectual alignment with one of the two lowest common denominators (largest pluralities) in a country on complex political topics? Consider how much each party's platform has changed in the last 20 years, and how much more they will change in the next 20. I would say it's more likely that someone like yourself is quite intelligent and creative and is instead unaware of those deeply ingrained tribal instincts.

Media in the US, especially now via incessant social media feeds, fuels this. It showers us with information showing how the "other side" is bad. So you can have a correct opinion that the other tribe is bad without any quantitative metrics to compare how bad it is compared to your tribe, which is also very bad.

Btw, regarding the basic personality traits thing. I found this paper very interesting [0]. Sort of refutes the "conservatives lack empathy and fear change" angle. On average, I suspect most liberals and conservatives have very similar averages across most personality traits and are mostly just a product of their environment.

[0] https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/34429211/#:~:text=Our%20meta...

by lend000

4/3/2025 at 4:19:20 AM

I think the claim is that a lot of people stick with the tribe regardless of how closely it matches their world views. It might be dismissive but it resonates. I've seen people keep voting for the same parties even when the policies have shifted very significantly.

Since you are left leaning, presumably American, a good example is the Republicans. The current policies and values of the Republicans seem to be very different than let's say those of 20 years ago. But you don't see a lot of movement, i.e. you don't really see people saying because your actions of policies changed I'm going to re-evaluate my support for you. Maybe the other team is now closer to my world views. It's a lot more common that people just keep voting for their camp or team. I'm sure there are studies, this is very anecdotal. There are also many e.g. single issue voters, they only care about a single issue and nothing else.

Independent thinkers, who dive deep into issues, who challenge beliefs, who weigh multiple issues and considerations, who potentially shift their position when the goal posts have moved or they've evaluated new information, are rare. It's much easier to stay in an echo chamber/team/tribe. We see this all the time, another example is the pandemic. It's lack of nuance.

You see this in the political discourse. Instead of debating things of substance it's more of a rally around the team approach. You're never going to see in-depth discussion/analysis on tax policies, or security policies. Anything that doesn't meet your world view is automatically discredited whether it has merit or not, It's going to be they bad we good/polarizing/conspiracies etc. This pushes people farther apart and I think it also pushes policies farther apart. Maybe sometimes it is that simple but plenty of times it's not.

by YZF

4/3/2025 at 5:26:40 AM

A lot of this is due to the failure of the American political system: there is simply no room for a third party. A lot of people don't want to vote for "their" party, it's merely a strategic vote in an attempt to keep the worse of two evil out of power.

If you vote for a third-party candidate, you might just as well not have voted at all. The parties will only genuinely start caring about policy when that gets fixed, and voters will only start looking into politics when there is more than one option on their side of the aisle.

by crote

4/3/2025 at 6:21:03 AM

There is room for third parties, but it's a hard road and in my lifetime, I've not seen any parties really try to take the road.

You've got to get your party organized at all levels and running candidates in most contests. Everyone seems to want to run a Presidential candidate, but if you're going to run only one election, it should be one you have a chance of winning. A lot of federal office holders previously held state or local office. If you want to seriously contest federal offices, you need to have candidates with elected experience. So, start with local districts, city council/mayorship, maybe county offices. From there, work towards state office. Then you can pick up some house seats, and eventually senate seats too. When the time is right, maybe try some of your seasoned politicians for President.

by toast0

4/3/2025 at 7:04:53 AM

Thing is you don’t even need a deep dive. Some things sound fishy. Some things are obvious political spin. This alone should stop people from identifying with any party.

by 2muchcoffeeman

4/3/2025 at 6:27:38 AM

world views change with time and parties lead&follow the process at the same time.

that will be shown strongly in a locked 2 party system like the usa has.

you say it is strange that not more people switch camps, but this is not accidental, an extreme amount of effort and resources are spent to maintain this.

by lucyjojo

4/3/2025 at 4:57:02 AM

exactly

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 6:14:39 AM

> one group actually reflects everything I believe

If you swap “group” for “religion,” this is how I feel about Catholicism. Make of that what you will.

by toasterlovin

4/3/2025 at 11:33:09 AM

> align with a progressive, left-leaning ideology.

Cooperation and scalability are two objectively good principles that our species can apply effectively... if and only if there is a genuine desire for cooperative, scalable, positive outcomes.

If social/political discourse has degraded to the point that cooperative, scalable, positive outcomes are off the table, look to those who have taken control of the discourse. Propaganda undermines language itself.

The difference between destructive behavior and constructive behaviour... has a bias.

by heresie-dabord

4/3/2025 at 5:11:14 AM

I think it refers to people, who I have run into quite a lot, who when faced with a new fact about politics or the behaviour of politicians, back the team over the idea.

Like if you were to say consider yourself a progressive. I would consider you a progressive, unless you for instance, supported something incredibly conservative that was performed by a "Good Guy" politician on your team.

For instance, we used to have this chap Daniel Andrews. Who was for better or worse, a mild progressive. He took a very hard stance on Covid related issues. Progressives, backed the man regardless. Conservatives criticised his every move. However, his own human rights review, found that he had violated the human rights of citizens in certain circumstances.

If you mention this to his critics, it reinforces their team. But if you mention this (incredibly obvious good faith criticism) to his supporters, not only does it reinforce their team, but they immediately seek to identify you as someone on the other team. A "crazy anti lockdown conservative" or similar. - That for me is the essence of tribalism.

To be fair I think this is a symptom of social media rather than just political awareness.

by protocolture

4/3/2025 at 7:44:14 AM

I've seen another example over the last few days.

Quite a few people who have been vociferously pro-EU and in favour of their protectionism, tariffs and non-tariff trade barriers have been going crazy over the US imposing tariffs, even though the US rates are far lower than the EU's.

A similar group has historically been strongly against government corruption but recently have been attacking efforts to uncover and stop corruption in the US Federal government.

by Devilspawn6666

4/3/2025 at 1:25:42 PM

> even though the US rates are far lower than the EU's

What does "far lower" mean to you? Can you give examples? Because to me, the view "Trumps tariffs are only matching what foreign nations already do" is just factually wrong.

Personally, I just think blanket tariffs as a significant form of government income is highly detrimental, from a foreign policy perspective (=> alienates allies, encourages retaliation), as a tax-substitute (because it's basically a regressive "tax-the-rich-less" scheme, which, given meteorically rising wealth inequality, is the last thing we need) and also for economic development (because there is neither the workforce, nor the actual desire, to build up low-margin manufacturing in the US-- making those products 30% more expensive is not gonna change that meaningfully).

> A similar group has historically been strongly against government corruption but recently have been attacking efforts to uncover and stop corruption in the US Federal government.

I don't have a lot of beef in this, personally, but if you're talking about doge:

I just have to look at their website, and what I see are numbers that don't add up at all, containing a lot of cuts for purely policy reasons, wrapped in highly partisan messaging.

I'd be strongly against that even if they advocated for wheelchair accessibility and gay rights on their twitter, or w/e.

Corruption, to me, is if you buy influence on government policy by spending money on officials, and that is exactly what I see under Trump.

by myrmidon

4/3/2025 at 9:47:37 AM

> efforts to uncover and stop corruption in the US Federal government.

Unserious. The big cheques in Wisconsin don't count? The presidential cryptocurrency?

by pjc50

4/3/2025 at 9:38:37 PM

You uh seem to have consumed some tribal coolaid lmao.

by protocolture

4/3/2025 at 2:08:03 PM

Both of these are basically strawman arguments - there are legitimate, non-tribal reasons to be against the actions taken re: tariffs and the purported anti-corruption tasks. For example, a person can be strongly against government corruption but also be strongly against the current efforts/methods being used for a multitude of reasons. And similar for tariffs. (Not having those debates here, just pointing out that I don't believe those examples hold up.)

by LocalPCGuy

4/3/2025 at 6:09:28 AM

agreed -- I also think social media exacerbated this

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 2:26:52 PM

> I'm not just glomming on to everything one "tribe" or another stands for ... one group actually reflects everything I believe.

I don't think that's unreasonable, but if you're in the US, you should really re-evaluate if this is true just because there are several significant issues over which the parties have flipped over the past few decades (and more if you go back further).

Obviously you didn't specify a party, but as one example: In the 1990s, the left wing party was where the free speech absolutists were. If you were a big "free speech" enthusiast back then and you still are now, then great! If your views have changed, that's fine, too, but there should be alarm bells going off in your head that your views changed along with the tribe.

by moduspol

4/3/2025 at 8:33:49 AM

Always remember that internet conversations are carried by a small group of antisocial losers, and a most of media articles complaining about society are specifically targeting that small but loud group.

An average person has a lot more in common with you than with the imaginary protagonist of this blogpost, who is really smart and wants to show that everyone else is really dumb.

Like other normal people, I discuss politics with friends; both with the ones I mostly agree with and the ones I mostly disagree with. We need to understand game theory and military strategy to have a useful conversation.

by mFixman

4/3/2025 at 10:34:16 AM

>By this reasoning it naturally follows that those of a certain "personality" will also share common beliefs, ideologies

Is this not borne out in your own life experience? Because it sure is in mine.

by potato3732842

4/3/2025 at 11:23:34 AM

In the US, you vote for one party or the other. It reduces to tribalism, so why do the extra work to get to the reductive result?

by douglee650

4/3/2025 at 6:36:06 AM

How do you avoid being "tribal" if you are not centerish?

by lynx97

4/3/2025 at 6:41:04 AM

just by being able to understand why you believe what you believe, for each individual view

center-ish is not a requirement, but a correlation -- rarely will someone independently come up with views that 100% match the somewhat-arbitrary positions of the left or right

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 2:48:04 PM

And what if "middle" is a tribe too ;)

by StefanBatory

4/3/2025 at 11:40:01 AM

Tribalism is part metaphor, part euphemism. What it’s really getting at is cult behavior. Agreeing with someone on a lot of things isn’t tribal and isn’t cult.

The actual problems of “tribalism” are exactly those of cults: worship of a leader or ideology, zero tolerance for criticism, cutting you off from other support networks, conspiracies, narratives of doom, promises of salvation, framing enemies as degenerates and deplorables, claiming exclusive ownership of truth and morality…

Red and blue alike have cult wings.

by jl6

4/3/2025 at 6:44:06 PM

Tribalism is just really bad pop-sociology, by people who can't be arsed to read and do their homework on a vast subject matter.

by calf

4/3/2025 at 7:00:11 AM

If you think these beleifs are inherent in the temperament of people, that doesnt explain the change of these beliefs over time. Progressive, left leaning ideology had different stances 20 years ago, let alone 50 years or in China or India.

Sometimes this is easier to see from the outside. For example, if the conservative right all independently arrived at the same conclusion based on personality, isnt it strange how the consensus all moves together and changes over time

by s1artibartfast

4/3/2025 at 12:38:23 PM

My impressions were they meant values and you meant policies.

by pseudalopex

4/3/2025 at 2:48:08 PM

I think you are probably right.

If you find people with shared values, and follow their changing policies, That still seems like tribal behavior to me.

by s1artibartfast

4/3/2025 at 12:17:11 PM

>Others, smarter than me, have gone into great detail about the underpinnings of left-leaning or right-leaning world views in people.

People also change. Until 25 maybe 30,I was left leaning in many issues.

Now I am mostly right aligned.

by DeathArrow

4/3/2025 at 5:16:11 AM

Martin Luther King was pretty clear what he thought of "the middle":

> I must confess that over the past few years I have been gravely disappointed with the white moderate. I have almost reached the regrettable conclusion that the Negro's great stumbling block in his stride toward freedom is not the White Citizen's Counciler or the Ku Klux Klanner, but the white moderate, who is more devoted to 'order' than to justice; who prefers a negative peace which is the absence of tension to a positive peace which is the presence of justice

by bsder

4/3/2025 at 6:56:34 AM

I think holding political opinions on the basis of what a famous (historical) person feels about them is sort of the thing being criticized here.

by FeepingCreature

4/3/2025 at 7:31:33 AM

Sounds like a kind of dumb thing to criticize, then. Picking the side of Martin Luther King Jr. on civil rights is…uh…kind of a difficult position to argue against.

by saagarjha

4/3/2025 at 4:46:23 PM

Yet, huge swaths of the US electorate to this day oppose Martin Luther King Jr.'s goals, message, methods, and outcomes.

by ryandrake

4/3/2025 at 7:16:48 AM

It's an example of when "not being tribal" is wrong, because one side wanted to keep denying civil rights to a group of people. The correct side was to protest and put pressure on the system. Take the war in Ukraine. There isn't a middle ground between resisting Russian aggression for Ukrainians and fighting back. You either resist, or you get conquered. Not all issues and situations have some happy middle ground where both sides are equal parts wrong/right.

by goatlover

4/3/2025 at 7:54:32 AM

you can be "not tribal" and still protest/put pressure on the system, has nothing to do with being moderate

tribalism refers to how you get your beliefs, not what you do with them

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 6:08:44 AM

yep, this is the "intentional" moderate which I also classify as tribal

distinctly different from the "accidental" moderate who could harbor indignation against racial prejudice as one of their views

https://www.paulgraham.com/mod.html

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 7:53:34 PM

The person receiving the pointy end of a spear doesn't much care whether you explicitly chose to stab him or whether you stabbed him because you are following your tribe.

by bsder

4/3/2025 at 5:21:03 AM

> The implication instead seems to be that unless you are somewhere in the middle of the spectrum you must be "tribal". That feels dismissive.

It's not about where you are on the spectrum. I know neoliberal moderate Democrats, people who would have voted for George H.W. Bush in 1988, who are more tribal about current U.S. politics than any socialist I've met. What makes it unpleasant to talk politics with them is a combination of two things: the narrow set of answers they're willing to accept on every topic, and the anger and suspicion they broadcast at anyone who says anything else. For example, they have an acceptable set of answers for why Trump won in 2024 (racism and sexism) and if you suggest any other contributing factors (like arrogance, elitism, and various screw-ups in the Democratic party) then you must be on the other side, blaming the victims and making excuses for Trump supporters. You can say a dozen things morally condemning Trump and the Republican Party and then make one strategic criticism of the Democrats, and they'll look at you like maybe they can't ever trust you anymore. They'll parade their emotional distress and look at you sideways if you don't have the energy to mirror it. All this without being especially politically informed, politically engaged, or politically radical, or caring if anybody else is informed, engaged, or radical -- they judge themselves and others purely by fervor and narrowness.

by dkarl

4/3/2025 at 5:46:22 PM

> You can say a dozen things morally condemning Trump and the Republican Party and then make one strategic criticism of the Democrats, and they'll look at you like maybe they can't ever trust you anymore.

I think some of this is a consequence of a decade or so of bad faith "wolf in sheep's clothing" online discourse.

I remember way back before Trump's first term, before GamerGate, before the alt-right when people would "joke" about racist and neonazi stuff on 4chan and elsewhere. It was framed as "We're just kidding around because it's fun to be edgy. It's ironic. Obviously, we're not really racist neonazis." People, mostly teens, took the bait and thought it was all in good fun but over time those ideas sunk in and actually stuck.

The next thing you know, we've got white supremacists parading in broad daylight.

If you poke around the dark (and these days not so dark) corners of the Internet, you can literally find people with toxic fringe beliefs discussing how to subtlely soften up their targets with seemingly innocent "just asking questions" when the ultimate goal is to (1) obscure which tribe they are actually a member of and (2) persuade people over to their tribe without them realizing it.

When you're in an environment where people like that do actually exist and participate in discourse, it's reasonable to wonder if the person you're talking to really does share your beliefs or not.

by munificent

4/3/2025 at 6:10:18 PM

How are those two situations remotely similar? A criticism of the Democratic Party should not be seen as a morally reprehensible "joke" that you have to walk back like "ha ha, just kidding, I would never criticize the party."

The idea that the Democratic Party is a flawed, mundane institution full of fallible people who make mistakes is not a toxic idea that we need to keep out of the discourse lest it "sink in and actually stick." It's more like medicine that the party is trying to administer to itself with one hand while the other hand tries to bat it away.

by dkarl

4/3/2025 at 6:01:58 AM

yep, this is exactly it -- it's not where you end up, it's the inability to separate from a group

there are tribalists on the left, right, and in the middle

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 10:26:30 AM

I think one of the distinguishing characteristics of tribalism is the inability to have low-stakes conversations about politics. To somebody who is deep in tribalism, every private ephemeral one-to-one conversation they have is a vital battle which very well may decide the fate of the world, so their vigilance and inflamed passion entirely justified and rational. Being a part of the tribe ruins their humility, the tribe is important, they are wed to the tribe, any political discussion they have is on behave of the tribe, and therefore very important. Alliance with the tribe confers importance to themselves and they thereby lose their humility. They lose the ability to recognize that the conversation isn't actually important, that they can relax and treat the other person like a human rather than a faceless representative of the enemy who they have a vital responsibility to defeat.

by lupusreal

4/3/2025 at 9:35:59 AM

You are right that you don't take part in tribalism, because you first have a value structure and then you looked critically at the political landscape and found where you have the largest overlap.

But tribalism is absolutely an issue in the modern age with huge swathes of population falling into social media echo chambers. People first find their tribe, and then they define their own personality by the views of that tribe, not the other way around.

Just look at all the people spewing "own the libs" or "maga fucktards". A significant portion of the population doesn't vote based on rational analysis, but by being part of a crowd. They don't even care or know what they vote for, as long as they are sticking it to people they perceive as enemies.

I think this is basically the terminal/minimum of the modern social network algo optimization. Everything is maximally polarized, nobody is willing to engage in good faith discussion with people who hold different views. Everyone has a known enemy and known allies and they can be fed what they like to hear and thus continue being addicted.

I don't know how to get out of this :(

by short_sells_poo

4/3/2025 at 10:59:12 AM

The United States especially is having a face to face with tribalism - if you live here and you don't see it you are basically blind.

We have parents posting that they are glad their child is dead instead of getting the measles vaccine, an entire pandemic that was ignored and downplayed, an election denied.

These are all simple examples of tribalism - choosing the tribe over ones own self interest and well being. Most sane people don't offer their children up to Baal.

by hobs

4/3/2025 at 2:44:39 PM

I think tribalism is being thought of as a pejorative when it isn’t. It merely is a phenomenon. What you describe above about yourself is pure tribalism of how you identify with the liberal tribe and could never even picture yourself as a member of other tribe. This is no different to me than a rabbi or priest talking about the tenets of their faith and how that leaves them no option but to be a member of that religion due to the moral underpinnings of those tenets that they believe in.

Tribal politics happen when we take these various tribes in our society and essentially blind them to their biases to the point where they can’t imagine at all why someone would even be in that other tribe. A complete loss of critical thinking ability emerges once it becomes us and them and not some of us and others of us, one species, no tribes, many ideas.

Do you actually believe all liberals are good and can do no evil? Do you actually believe all conservatives are cartoonishly evil idiots? I’d hope you could see the nuance but your description makes it seem like there is one way but the highway. And the reflexive counter argument from the liberals is “but racism” but then again, explain the phenomenon of the black or latino Trump supporter? Clearly there is more nuance going on in what is sensible to people than what we can gleam out of the black and white painted descriptions from the thought leaders in our tribe.

by kjkjadksj

4/3/2025 at 12:03:26 PM

Just in the last election cycle, we saw tribal Democratic voters try and silence those protesting the Biden administration and then immediately go "we have always been at war with Eurasia" and do the exact same thing for Kamala.

And MAGA goes beyond being tribal: by any objective measure, it's a cult.

Plus you see an awful lot of people who will criticize one side for doing one thing while supporting the other side for doing the exact same thing. Obama, for example, was the Deporter-in-Chief (~3 million deported), Biden continued the Trump policy of using Title 42 to deny asylum claims and Kamala proposed building the very same border wall that all Democrats protested when Trump proposed it in 2020.

I'm a leftist and any leftist will have seen so many liberals who love progressive aesthetics but turn into a jack-booted fascist the second you want to address any of the underlying economic issues. For example, tell people "house prices need to come down" to solve any number of issues such as homelessness and see how they react.

> The implication instead seems to be that unless you are somewhere in the middle of the spectrum you must be "tribal". That feels dismissive.

On this, I 100% agree. There are several reasons why:

1. Intellectual laziness. People think they're "above the fray" by bothsidesing everything;

2. Ignorance. This is particularly an issue for Democratic voters in the US. Both Democrats and Republicans are neoliberals. US foreign policy is bipartisan. Full-throated support for capitalism is bipartisan. But a large segment of Democrats tell themselves they're good people for wearing a pride pin while at the same time thinking homeless people should die in the stree; or

3. Deception. This is particularly the case for Republicans who will try and center their positions by appealing to "common sense" and label Democrats, who are a center-right party, as "the far Left" or "the radical Left".

So, yes, people do use "tribalism" as an epithet to silence legitimate criticisim but there is also tribalism.

by jmyeet

4/3/2025 at 4:11:34 PM

> After seven years in San Diego, my wife and I have decided to uproot our family and move to the Bay Area. While there were many factors (a new job opportunity, family), a significant reason was finding a community of truth-seeking people.

Funny. The lack of truth-seeking and truth-telling is one of the chief reasons I moved away from the Bay Area.

by earksiinni

4/3/2025 at 4:40:05 PM

You'll find unquestioning dogmatism everywhere you go unfortunately.

For what it's worth, the odds for rationally evaluating political ideas tend to go up around folks that have gone to universities that are known for some decent level of intellectual rigor.

Still not great though, some of the most dogmatic people I've met in my life were professors and undergrads. But those that were the opposite more than made up for that.

by LinuxAmbulance

4/3/2025 at 5:10:04 PM

It sounds like you're describing what I know as trait openness?

Discussion of new ideas is an "openness" thing.

Funnily enough personality traits are a strong predictor for political preference. Personality traits are also a predictor of career choices.

by engineer_22

4/3/2025 at 4:31:37 PM

You can't say that and then not share where you moved to. Now I'm curious. I don't live in the Bay Area so not defending it in any way.

by trevor-e

4/3/2025 at 9:21:47 PM

curious where you moved?

I completely understand it could not have what we're looking for, which is why this was only one component among larger ones (family + new job)

by shw1n

4/2/2025 at 6:37:44 PM

I'm 52. For me, there was a time when it was considered impolite to talk about sex, religion and politics. Then it became super fun when done with open/questioning/rational/critical minds, and a lot of progress in my own thinking was achieved from the usually non-threatening but lively debates and fights among friends and family for ideas. Then it shifted in the last ten or fifteen years. When social media started having friends of friends, the tribalism kicked in. It was explained very well in a talk between Maria Ressa and Jon Stewart. She is brilliant, and well worth listening to. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jsHoX9ZpA_M

by pcblues

4/3/2025 at 3:26:31 AM

Everything is because of increasing wealth inequality, it is the root cause of almost every societal problem. It was easier to have non-threatening debates because everyone felt more secure. When people are stressed and afraid, the debates aren’t just intellectual exercises but things that could mean the loss of real opportunities in their lives. This is a trend that has been going on for a very long time, Pikkety showed mathematically that it’s easier to make money when you already have money and this runaway process is nearing an extreme.

I firmly believe that if wealth distribution today was the same as it was in the 70s-90s, the culture wars would be significantly dampened or non existent. If people could still buy homes, afford to have kids and healthcare, we would all be able to talk about religion, sex, and politics without this extreme tribalism. It’s happening because there are way more “losers” in the economic game now, it’s become a life or death issue, and people are looking for who to blame.

by an0malous

4/3/2025 at 7:13:35 AM

I largely agree. Recently I'm somewhat minded to think the issue is actually about the huge expansion of the rentier class. The problem began with the adoption of neoliberalism and the mainstreaming of the idea that you could reasonably "earn" money by simply having money. Prior classical and Keynesian thought railed against such rent seeking and sought to eliminate it as a parasitic drag on the economy.

Since the decision was made post GFC to bail out the banks and protect capital over the normal person that just wanted a house to live in, the position of the rentiers has been consolidated hugely. We have Rachel Reeves thinking we in the UK can build a growth strategy on the back of financial services (which generally means "rent-extraction services"). A rational system would separate the GDP from the real economy from the income from rent extraction, and seek to eliminate the latter.

To the common man, they see themselves working longer and harder than they used to and getting a smaller and smaller slice of the pie. It turns out when your real outputs have to support a sizeable portion of the population who have dedicated their lives to the art of rent extraction to live like kings, you don't see much of the gain.

I have many contemporaries that have gone into finance. A vast pool of intellectual capability, shuffling money around playing zero sum games, and ultimately protected from loss by the power of the state.

by hgomersall

4/3/2025 at 6:23:40 PM

> It was easier to have non-threatening debates because everyone felt more secure. When people are stressed and afraid, the debates aren’t just intellectual exercises but things that could mean the loss of real opportunities in their lives.

You’re right that people feel less secure, but that doesn’t mean that they are correct when they feel that.

By pretty much any measure, I believe that people in 2025 are far more secure than they were in 1975, 1985 or 1995.

by zeveb

4/3/2025 at 12:58:59 PM

affordability & inflation & services =/= wealth inequality

by lanfeust6

4/3/2025 at 2:02:06 PM

It roughly does for inelastic goods like housing, education, and healthcare

by an0malous

4/3/2025 at 2:33:58 PM

All of these can be more elastic. See: zoning reform and prices in blue cities vs red cities, single-payer healthcare in every developed country other than the US. Inequality is not the distinguishing factor.

by lanfeust6

4/3/2025 at 7:26:34 PM

[dead]

by throwaway29812

4/3/2025 at 4:34:22 AM

Agree social media is a big problem. It lets people live in an imaginary reality echo chamber.

However in the real world and 1:1 you can still have good discussions with smart people who disagree with you. And we need to have those.

by YZF

4/2/2025 at 7:49:06 PM

> Then it shifted in the last ten or fifteen years. When social media started having friends of friends, the tribalism kicked in. It was explained very well in a talk between Maria Ressa and Jon Stewart.

Also by Jon Stewart on Crossfire in 2004: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=aFQFB5YpDZE&t=310s

The critique about what passes for debate is as apt today as it was then.

by ethbr1

4/2/2025 at 6:46:57 PM

yeah I actually also enjoy it when the other party is more interested in learning than winning

will check this out, thanks for reading!

by shw1n

4/2/2025 at 7:01:19 PM

Very much this. The world has changed. It used to be that assuming other people have a low capacity for political reason was itself a "political position" - namely elitism. Folks like Orwell come from a long, long tradition of the educated and socially astute working class. Social media turned the joy of everyday political banter, rational scepticism, and good-natured disputation into a bourgeois pissing contest with seemingly life-or-death stakes.

by nonrandomstring

4/3/2025 at 9:59:59 AM

> but lively debates and fights among friends and family for ideas

The missing ingredient is "intellectual honesty". It used to be the case that when you talked to people on the right they would

    - refer to events that actually happened and true statements about the world
    - accept them in the context of wider events (although there's always been a risk of making policy from one exeptional incident)
    - make an argument that followed logically from those
This did end up in duelling statistics and arguments over what mattered, but that's a reasonable place for discussion. Nowadays it's much deeper into making wild arguments from conspiracy theories with no or highly questionable evidence. Pizzagate. Birtherism. And so on.

by pjc50

4/3/2025 at 6:50:42 PM

This hits too close to home.

A while back I realized that most news stations have a clear bias and eventually started to dive deeper on stories I was interested in.

I try to look into the source material when possible and found time and time again that the 'news' either left out key details or completely misrepresented the source material.

I never bring up politics, but friends will often repeat news stories and occasionally I'll bring up key facts that weren't reported on.

This has never changed anyone's opinion. Usually all it does is make the other person upset or they bring up another story to reaffirm their currently held belief.

Thankfully my relationships are strong enough that I haven't lost any friends over this, but it's incredibly isolating. Feels like brainwashing on a massive scale.

That's not to say that the news isn't to be trusted at all, some things are as reported. But, often times this isn't the case and it's more important than ever to think critically and not take news stories at face value. The division is mostly manufactured and I believe at our core most of us want the same things.

by BrickFingers

4/3/2025 at 5:51:01 PM

> By far, relationships determine the happiness of ones life, and relationships are not beholden to truth. In fact, they are very commonly built on the opposite. Whether a boss' reprimands are deserved or not, employees bond over a common enemy. Entire groups form on the basis of beliefs, false or otherwise. We have a word for this: “religion".

> Despite organized religion dropping in attendance, religious patterns of behavior are still everywhere, just adapted to a secular world. Health, exercise, politics, work, self-improvement -- these are all things I've seen friends employ their religious muscle into, across all spectrums and political aisles. And as we get older, I'm seeing more and more of my supposedly-secular friends engage in such behavior.

I have a hypothesis that all humans are compelled to indulge in a certain amount of magical thinking. We seem to be hard-wired to believe there is more underlying metaphysical order and pattern to the universe than there actually is.

I presume this is evolutionarily advantageous because it's better to assume you have more agency and ability to predict than you actually do. Over-assuming leads to occasional disappointment and frustration when things don't work out, but under-assuming leads to having less impact than you actually could have.

If that hypothesis is true, then probably the best thing for society is to provide cultural structures that let us indulge than impulse in non-harmful ways, instead of, say, giving it to religions that also tell us to murder gay people.

Sort of like how sports function as a safe pressure release valve for the compulsion towards competition and violence.

by munificent

4/3/2025 at 7:23:28 PM

> If that hypothesis is true, then probably the best thing for society is to provide cultural structures that let us indulge than impulse in non-harmful ways, instead of, say, giving it to religions that also tell us to murder gay people.

I agree with this take a lot, and actually tried to imagine what Religion 2.0 could be based on this premise

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 4:56:45 AM

I can strongly sympathize. The image with the squares and circles hit home hard, from an early age, it's been pretty lonely. Depending on your environment it can be super hard to find others part of the 1%, so you really need to treasure them when you do find them.

One point of criticism:

The usage of the word "moderate". It seems PG's article is the one to blame here. The word "moderate" when used about politics means something to people in English. And given that meaning, saying that independent thought leads to one being "moderate", is straight up wrong. What the article is really talking about is that independent thought leads to a set of beliefs that is unlikely to be a very good fit for any particular ideology, and therefore, political party. That's true! But that's not "moderate". That's.. diverse, pragmatic, non-ideological. Those words aren't ideal either, but "moderate" is definitely not it.

The 99%/1% is also greatly overstated in a way. Firstly, it's definitely dependent on locale, culture, subculture, environment, as the writer already says themselves. More importantly, if you manage to somehow get people 1:1 in an environment where they feel safe, it turns out that many actually aren't that tribal/ideological after all, and they do actually have beliefs that span different mainstream tribes. But then that conversation finishes, and they go back to being a tribe member.

I'm pretty sure there's plenty of experiments that directly show the above. That when you give people policy choices that are non-obvious (e.g. they've never thought about), and then make them vote on them, they'll often vote against their tribe. But if you'd beforehand tell them which tribe voted which way, they'll always vote with the tribe.

by jjani

4/3/2025 at 2:36:01 PM

There's a specific explanation saying that that's not what it's saying

by juped

4/3/2025 at 6:39:30 PM

I find it easy to discuss politics with friends. The hard part is listening, being open to persuasion yourself. Walzing into a discussion believing the other ones are stupid people with simple arguments rooted in misunderstandings — yeah, that won't fly.

You can smell it in the article. it's right there. The author thinks he's intellectually superior and arrived at his opinion though a pure intellectual pursuit, where the stupid conversation partners can't follow.

I completely understand how you're not having fruitful discussions.

by knallfrosch

4/2/2025 at 6:42:34 PM

I like it. There's an easier answer to "why don't people move from tribe to view". It's because it's painful to question one's own beliefs, and that's how that change happens. In fact such a move appears masochistic to many, since it almost never pays to undermine loyalty in favor of principle.

I hypothesize that we're seeing the influence of the legal system on the public turbo-charged by Citizens United money. An attorney is paid to be a "zealous advocate" for their client. This means never spending effort on anything that might be against the client's interest. Self-reflection is stochastically against their interest, so why even risk it? Considering alternative views might be against your interest, so why risk it? Therefore, in this new zeitgeist, such behavior is not just perverse and painful, but even unethical and wrong.

The problem, of course, is that for this system of adversarial argument you need an impartial judge. In theory that would be the public, but it turns out flooding people's minds with unethical lawyer screed 24x7 turns more people into lawyers, not judges. "The world is changed. I feel it in the water. I feel it in the earth. I smell it in the air. Much that once was is lost, for none now live who remember it." This could very well refer to the value of dignity, honor, integrity, fairness in debate, respect for one's opponents. These are always under assault, but in the last 10 years they have been decimated to the point people don't remember they ever held sway and young people don't know what politics was like when they did.

by simpaticoder

4/2/2025 at 6:48:16 PM

Challenging your own viewpoints is not just hard, it's downright dangerous. You can really lose your sense of identity and question your own morals if you are not well-grounded. It's much easier to dig your heels in and try to limit your self-reflection to be more "safe". (I still think you should question your viewpoints, but I don't blame people for being a little afraid.)

This is especially true if you have a history of being somewhat cruel to people on the basis of a conclusion you're not really 100% sure you agree with anymore. Now if you question it, you have a lot of guilt to contend with.

by jchw

4/2/2025 at 7:10:09 PM

OTOH, I am the kind of person who feels great joy in discovering that I have been wrong about something, I have learned something better, and I have deepened my understanding. It could be about anything. Challenging my viewpoints is very enjoyable.

It surprises me that most people don't seem to feel that way and I struggle to understand why. Apparently, people often feel angry and alienated by the truth. I think that never makes sense, but I've learned to accept that people simply feel threatened by the truth sometimes and I can't usually convince them otherwise.

by hathawsh

4/2/2025 at 7:14:11 PM

I feel this way too, it's in one of the footnotes actually

"[8] Few things give me greater joy than a discovery-ridden conversation with smart friends, and this is only enhanced if I learn something I previously believed to be true is actually wrong. Seriously, come prove some core belief I have as wrong and you will quite literally make my week."

Thanks for reading!

by shw1n

4/2/2025 at 7:19:05 PM

Thanks for writing! This is a very well written essay that I need to read repeatedly.

by hathawsh

4/2/2025 at 9:28:04 PM

Ty! I wrote it for myself / to send people to when we encounter the same conversation loop haha

by shw1n

4/2/2025 at 8:45:11 PM

You have to be wrong to learn. Sure it can be frustrating to try to make or do something difficult. But you've never done it before, of course you're not going to know all the correct answers! It just makes it all the more sweet when you do make progress and start to know more about a subject.

by bloopernova

4/2/2025 at 7:16:01 PM

I generally agree, but some views wind up being pretty central to one's identity. It's easy to give up a viewpoint where the stakes are very low, but the stakes can potentially be very, very high (on a personal level.)

by jchw

4/2/2025 at 7:09:34 PM

I would say as I've gotten older, I've actually tried to be a little more grounded in my beliefs. Our political world is so crazy, that I think sometimes, it can even be hard being committed to basic kindergarten morality. "Look at all these bad people doing bad things and being successful, maybe I should do bad things to be more successful" is a challenge to your viewpoints that is worth cutting off at the roots.

by techpineapple

4/2/2025 at 9:30:04 PM

I suppose, but there is no such thing as objective morality, it's all subjective. That’s not to say people shouldn’t feel guilt or hesitate when evaluating their past actions, but we often act based on the best framework we had at the time.

Morality evolves, both personally and culturally, and trying to hold a static identity in the face of that change just leads to more internal conflict. It’s uncomfortable, yeah, but clinging to certainty for safety’s sake can be more corrosive in the long run.

by swat535

4/2/2025 at 7:04:20 PM

Yep agree with this a lot, identity-shattering is dangerous indeed

by shw1n

4/2/2025 at 7:08:46 PM

I totally disagree. "Shattering" one's identity (which is a completely fictional idea, only existing inside one's head) is essential for finding one's place in the universe.

Failure to adopt an accurate perspective of one's place in the universe is the greatest source of human anxiety.

Plus, if you can't discuss something like politics with people, are they really your friends at all? Not very good ones at least...

by johnea

4/2/2025 at 7:20:48 PM

Sorry I should clarify, I personally agree with you and share your opinion on shattering identifies being a positive

But I understand why someone may not want to I guess

by shw1n

4/2/2025 at 6:45:02 PM

"since it almost never pays to undermine loyalty in favor of principle"

nailed it imo, thanks for reading!

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 1:01:32 PM

They become too entangled with identity. The advantage of holding one's identity loosely, and attributing it one's actions, is it facilitates changing one's mind about certain things, or updating beliefs in increments.

by lanfeust6

4/3/2025 at 3:07:07 AM

.. "we will need writers who remember freedom" Ursula Le Guin

Both of our best ways at getting to the truth - Journalism and Science - rely on entertaining and following all sorts of contradictory ideas and then comparing them with observed reality.

Universities in particular need to be physically safe spaces, where ideas of every kind can be mercilessly attacked.

We are losing what took so long to build.

by jgord

4/3/2025 at 12:30:31 PM

An interesting blog post that would probably do well to look into something like Rob Kegan's theories of adult development [0] and looking up some stats on how many people fit into each category. People actually categorise fairly well into a model where ~66% of the population simply don't understand the concept of independent thought and rely heavily on social signalling to work out what is true.

That model explains an absurd number of social dynamics and a big chunk of politics - which is mostly people with a high level of adult development socially signalling to the masses what they are meant to be doing.

The important observation is that it isn't intellectual honesty that is the problem or truth-seeking the solution. It is actually whether someone is capable of identifying that truth != popular opinion. People who form their opinions by social osmosis can still be intellectually honest if they land in the right sort of community, but they fall apart under social pressure.

[0] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robert_Kegan#The_Evolving_Self

by roenxi

4/3/2025 at 3:10:56 AM

Thoughtful perspective on the social risks of political discussions. However, respectfully engaging with differing viewpoints is valuable for personal and societal growth. Perhaps focusing discussions on understanding each other's underlying values and experiences, rather than specific political positions, could lead to more productive conversations.

by sD4fG_9hJ

4/3/2025 at 5:02:36 AM

I have no reason to "respectfully engage" with beliefs like 'trans people should all be put in jail' (https://www.nbcnews.com/nbc-out/out-politics-and-policy/texa...) or 'kill all the Jews' (https://www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2017/08/nazis-r...).

by crooked-v

4/3/2025 at 11:49:04 AM

On the flip side, one black man has reformed hundreds of KKK members through conversation alone.

https://www.npr.org/2017/08/20/544861933/how-one-man-convinc...

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Accidental_Courtesy:_Daryl_Dav...

Sometimes you have to fight¹, but other times engaging with an open mind² really is the most efficient strategy. Shouting at the opposition only cements them in their own thinking; to change minds you have to understand and engage them where they’re at. And yes, this is way easier said than done and can be quite frustrating.

¹ You probably won’t convince a fascist dictator to change their ways by appealing to their better nature, and it would take too long while irreperable damage is being done.

² Even if the other side believes in something appallingly hateful.

by latexr

4/3/2025 at 5:40:30 AM

[flagged]

by curiousgal

4/3/2025 at 3:28:53 AM

This can be done, carefully, through in-person conversations. I think it may be nearly impossible on social media, whose primary purpose seems to be to enforce group identity.

by gmoot

4/3/2025 at 3:35:15 AM

This. I try to meet everyone where they are when entering into political discussions. I’ve learned a lot from people as a result of this and — I’d like to think — have successfully communicated an understanding of my own perspectives. Being able to sit down and talk to someone you disagree with is so important and I feel it is something we have gradually lost over time.

by zephyreon

4/3/2025 at 8:05:36 AM

The perspective of the article is completely delusional. The idea that the author thinks they are above the petty "tribe" politics and have based their views on rationality and scientific evidence is complete bollocks.

The author has less self-awareness that the classic "I voted for the guy everyone else is voting for" guy. At least the later has a hint of consciousness about his own limitations.

Every ideology under the sun thinks they are based on objective truth. In reality our political views are shaped by the friends we have, our family, our upbringing, our social class, the media we consume, the experiences we made, our deep core vales and so much more. Most of it is not even conscious.

If you think you are above it all, you are just deluding yours. You just enjoy being in the enlightened centrist tribe or whatever.

Not choosing a stance is also choosing stance. If you see injustice and decide to stay neutral you decided to side with the oppressor.

In the end it is up to you to decide which tribe you want to belong. Do you want to march with those that fight for human dignity and social progress or those that want to oppress the many for the benefit of the few. Or do you want to sit by the sidelines while other people are striped of their human rights?

by cardanome

4/3/2025 at 8:56:34 PM

Political discussions for me are like programming. I enjoy them because I like finding bugs in people's logic like I do in programming.

I find a lot of people's political arguments wouldn't compile because of basic logic errors, and I try to point this out. But not many people are interested in this kind of analysis, they instead prefer the tribalist point-scoring like the OP mentions.

I dream of a world where political debates can be syntax-checked. I'm sure you could do it with AI today.

But in the end its all about feelings.

I can't describe how many times I will just go along with someone's passionate ranting on something I disagree with and egg them along because its makes them happy. This is tribalism. I will disagree with the group, and if you saw me you'd think I was the strongest supporter, but I actually vehemently disagree with everything.

There are very few people it's worth having a real discussion with these days.

I don't change my opinion of people for what they think, but it's very rare to find people who reciprocate this.

by erlich

4/3/2025 at 10:05:54 PM

I think one of biggest problems the American voter has is two fold: 1. We have turned politicians into celebrities/heroes. ALL politicians are just like most of us: they are flawed and incomplete individuals who desperately try to hide their flaws. (Under normal circumstances, this isn't so bad. However, to be an elected official with all that power, it's fraud at the very least.

2. Once elected, we refuse to hold the politicians we elected to almost any accountability. (This is very hard to do, no doubt, because of the way the laws have been manipulated to stop this very accountability.)

As for religion in politics: I'm a devoted Christian who is sane enough to know that not everyone will believe the same as I do. I have one vote on election day, to manipulate other people's vote by having my candidate changing laws to thwart the constitution is theft and immoral. (As difficult as it is to say, Christians today should read 2 Peter Ch2, taking it to heart. Stop only glossing over the cheerful faith verses and start reading the one's that call for accountability.)

by bloomingeek

4/2/2025 at 7:23:25 PM

I'll just add one thing I learned: what people do is way more important than what they say or what their politics is.

I now find it much more practical to focus on things we can agree on and actually do something about in the real world and try to build from that.

Generic political debates are not very actionable and they are risky for social reasons mentioned in the article, so I think they are largely a waste of time with negative externalities.

by panstromek

4/3/2025 at 3:31:14 AM

I like this, but what we do, is vote. Between work and kids there is no more time “to do”. I donate to UNICEF but that’s it.

by ListeningPie

4/3/2025 at 4:48:13 AM

Work and raising kids are important activities that are a great way to take the measure of a person.

What more do you really need to look at?

by fastball

4/3/2025 at 5:17:41 PM

Work, raise kids, vote to let women die rather than remove an already-dead fetus--yeah, sorry, people dying does kinda matter to me, actually, and I don't think that's crazy or can be dismissed as "tribalism".

by kerkeslager

4/3/2025 at 2:53:33 PM

I have often observed something about how we build software; I just realized that my observations are of a more fundamental human problem.

First, people are not good at defining problems. They may describe the problem that they want to solve in terms of an outcome, but often times the outcome that they want also includes some aspect that benefits them personally that is separate from the problem that they are describing.

Second, people are not good at separating problem from implementation. in fact, people are horrible at this. I think people have a very difficult time envisioning that the problem and the existing solution implementation (which itself might be making the problem worse) are separate things. so most people rarely consider and often actively oppose, radically different solutions.

In the political sphere, ideology Influences how one frames the problem that one wants to solve, and limits the universe of acceptable solutions. This exemplifies the two points that I raised above.

For example, when talking about healthcare policy, the two main “sides” in the US, both have ideologies that define outcomes in terms of consumer access to medical services, and which constrain allowable implementations to something that resembles insurance, with key differences being about who pays and what is covered and how much coverage one gets.

Just for the purposes of elaborating on my premise, I would point out that not all healthcare delivery systems in the world are designed around the insurance model, And that such a model includes vested interests, regulatory capture, and often incentivizes many participants to optimize in ways that don’t forward the implicit goal of making more people more healthy.

Please don’t reply with your opinions on my imperfect example; I don’t want to have a healthcare policy discussion. I just wanted to provide an example my main points about how humans approach political problem-solving.

by efitz

4/3/2025 at 3:01:37 PM

> Second, people are not good at separating problem from implementation. in fact, people are horrible at this. I think people have a very difficult time envisioning that the problem and the existing solution implementation (which itself might be making the problem worse) are separate things. so most people rarely consider and often actively oppose, radically different solutions.

I'm bouncing back and forth on this. One thing I've learned over nearly two decades of programming, is that problems often are not separate from implementation - the one often defines or shapes the other to a large degree. Moreover, often enough it's not worth it to aim for clean separation - that's the road to becoming an "architecture astronaut".

I've also noticed this generalizes outside of programming. The key insight being, when people accuse "techies" of being "know-it-alls" and coming up with simplistic solutions (or my pet peeve of a term, "technological solutions to social problems"), what they're complaining about is generalizations - the kind you get when you focus on the abstract problem and forget about implementation details. This is particularly notable when one then tries to transfer a general solution/framework from one problem space to another, because whether or not it applies is largely determined by implementation details.

An example: understanding exponential growth and connecting it with basic virology is good. Applying that model to virological problems is okay - but the devil's in the details. Transferring that model to something else by means of analogy? Well, that very much depends on which assumptions you borrowed from virology, and it's helpful to be aware of those assumptions (implementation details) in the first place.

Seen plenty of that on every side of argument during COVID.

by TeMPOraL

4/3/2025 at 4:57:27 PM

People aren't good at defining problems when it comes to political views because - as far as I can tell - nearly everyone has zero interest in actually solving the issue, or putting in work to do so.

They want someone else to do the hard work and play Monday morning quarterback. To extend the sportsball metaphor, the football team is doing the actual work and they're just spectators rooting for their team.

No one wants to do work without being compensated, and virtually no one is being compensated to actually solve these problems. Politicians are there to get re-elected first and anything else second. Charitable organizations pay little to nothing, and get the kind of personnel that are OK with that.

At this point, there's so much tribalism wrapped around policy issues that it might be impossible to get anyone to try to objectively solve the issue. And all too often, there is no viable way to A/B test the solution and people have to hope that their solution works best, which is... Not a great way to get great results.

by LinuxAmbulance

4/3/2025 at 1:55:47 PM

If you don't talk politics with friends, who are you going to talk to about that?

Probably nobody.

Who will win the elections then? The forces whose supporters do talk politics with friends.

by nottorp

4/3/2025 at 2:00:22 PM

> Who will win the elections then? The forces whose supporters do talk politics with friends.

Well.. who go around reinforcing team allegiances, not people who talk politics. That's a pretty big distinction imo.

by boxed

4/3/2025 at 2:06:36 PM

That's some US cultural thing, i think. Possibly because you only have two real political options.

If we're philosophising, the isolated suburb life style precludes having a friend group and forces humans - because they need to belong - into tribal allegiances towards larger groups: political, sports fans, some church, Rust, "AI"...

by nottorp

4/3/2025 at 2:20:35 PM

It's a human thing. In Rome it was chariot teams. Suburbia isn't to blame.

by boxed

4/3/2025 at 7:43:43 PM

I hear this soooo often. If you can't talk to friends about your honest opinions without being respectful to one another and also being willing to listen to their reasoning and opinions, what kind of friendship is that?

by twothreeone

4/3/2025 at 6:56:28 PM

>Most people don't have political views, they have political tribes

Agree with this. Also, I do believe most people are appallingly stupid (I might not not be an exception either), cruel and easy to manipulate, and as a result are incapable of making rational decisions that benefit society as a whole. I try to never ever discuss politics with anyone, it's one of the most damaging and useless activities there is.

Usually, interactions with people on (arguably) political issues just leave me stupefied - no, I don't think people born in certain geographical locations are subhuman because of decisions of their current government; no, I don't hate nor wish death and suffering to anyone; no, I don't think the war is necessary and I don't want anyone to be blown to bits by a drone; no, I don't think artificial lines on a map ("countries") define who is wrong and who is right and worth throwing your only life away for; no, I don't think decisions of the government reflect the opinion of the entire population of that country; yes, I do think people I disagree with are real human beings with capabilities of sense, emotion, and thought just like I am; and the list goes on and on. Anyway, most people have a very different idea on the aforementioned examples. I don't care about the replies, just wanted to offload this filth off my head somewhat.

by ZpJuUuNaQ5

4/3/2025 at 6:35:47 AM

Curious how many comments say "it's not about tribalism, it's just the other side is evil". Ctrl+f for this very word on the page yields interesting results.

by alexey-salmin

4/3/2025 at 7:19:34 AM

Not me! (My comment is currently just above yours). We have all been victimized by the information space which has been polluted by increasingly unhinged vitriol, itself funded by Citizens United money and amplified by novel internet platforms. It is not a coincidence that virtually all pundits are lawyers, and PR firms probably have a lot of them too. They know how to zealously advocate for a client, and have applied those skills to the public sphere. It's worse than that, because outside of a courtroom they can lie, distort, and fabricate at will for their clients, with no judge to scold them. The average human adult cannot stew in this poison for a decade and not be harmed by it. My heart goes out to all those who's egos have been inflated, who's feelings of hatred and ill-will encouraged, not because they chose it, but because it's impossible to get away from it.

by simpaticoder

4/3/2025 at 4:48:30 PM

Way more than anyone should be comfortable with.

Looks through thread

Tribalism and purity tests abound.

by LinuxAmbulance

4/3/2025 at 5:33:53 PM

Is it tribalism to say Hitler is evil? Recognizing a universal negative isn't tribalism. The view that all things are equal and nothing matters is more so of the nihilist tribe.

by jajuuka

4/3/2025 at 10:51:45 PM

Saying that Hitler is evil is not tribalism, it's the exact opposite:

1) you're judging an individual and not a group

2) you're judging him for what he did not for who he was

by alexey-salmin

4/3/2025 at 1:02:57 PM

It's disappointing to see.

by lanfeust6

4/3/2025 at 5:11:30 PM

Okay, I Ctrl+F'ed for "evil" and found... nobody calling anyone else evil (actions, not people, were described as evil by one commenter--the rest were discussing ethics in the abstract, not describing anyone or any action as evil).

But let me present a possibility: what if one side really is doing evil things? If you were transported to literal Nazi Germany or the Stalinist USSR, where millions of people were being murdered by one party, would it be "tribalism" to call that party's actions evil? Or would it be an accurate description of murdering millions of people?

Obviously we aren't at the point of "murdering millions of people" in the US yet, but I suspect a lot of this "enlightened centrism" which presents both sides as somehow just equally valid viewpoints would happily go all the way to watching millions get murdered and still not be willing to call evil by its name.

by kerkeslager

4/3/2025 at 10:40:48 PM

> Okay, I Ctrl+F'ed for "evil" and found... nobody calling anyone else evil (actions, not people, were described as evil by one commenter--the rest were discussing ethics in the abstract, not describing anyone or any action as evil).

I was mainly referring to dialogs like the one below. Not quite abstract.

  >> I think essentially tolerating other peoples opinions and trying to understand where they are coming from is more useful than applying purity tests to your friends and family.

  > It's more about watching people pivot towards unquestionable evil. "Empathy is a sin" is such a deep, dark line in the sand. I'm not going to just stand there and watch you cross it.
> But let me present a possibility: what if one side really is doing evil things? If you were transported to literal Nazi Germany or the Stalinist USSR, where millions of people were being murdered by one party, would it be "tribalism" to call that party's actions evil?

Amazing example. If you got magically transported to the "literal Nazi Germany" you would discover that the popular opinion at the time was to call "evil" the communists and the jews. If you spend a long time calling someone "evil" you gradually stop seeing them as people. This is how later on you don't notice when they're relocated into ditches and furnaces. Inhumane treatment doesn't raise the alarm when applied to non-humans. Check for instance what this SS veteran has to say [1].

Tribalism is not whether you're allowed or not to call people evil. Tribalism is calling people evil not because they did something evil, but because they belong to the wrong group or sympathize with it.

The original post does not advocate for "enlightened centrism", furthermore centrists are as prone to tribalism as anybody else. Applying blanket judgement is a very natural thing to do because it saves a hell lot of time and energy. Why argue about all the topics, why argue about all the individuals when you can just divide people in tribes and decide who's evil at the tribe level. Everyone does it to some extent. However if you overdo it, you may indeed find yourself in Nazi Germany.

[1] https://youtu.be/G6lN_VVaqdA?t=2811

by alexey-salmin

4/3/2025 at 3:30:19 PM

[dead]

by const_cast

4/3/2025 at 12:17:46 PM

>> be able to understand and empathize with the various (and often opposing) groups involved in a topic

Interestingly, I have seen Elon (DOGE) and others outside of politics (that mega-church leader) telling the public (dare I say, their followers) that one of the main problems with America is empathy, and that we need to _stop_ empathizing with others.

by readingnews

4/3/2025 at 5:05:59 PM

Interesting. From what I've seen, the lack of empathy is the root of most of the political problems in the US.

If people put the welfare of others first, for example, taxpayer funded universal healthcare wouldn't even be something that was debated, it would be implemented with as much fuss as we have over painting lane markers on streets. But Americans care less for their fellow American than most other countries out there it seems.

How would removing what little empathy that there is improve matters?

by LinuxAmbulance

4/3/2025 at 6:33:38 PM

To them, removing empathy allows doing “what needs to be done,” like sending undesirables to a desolate work camp in a foreign country without any legal recourse.

See also: “the sin of empathy.” https://www.reddit.com/r/SaltLakeCity/comments/1i942hf/ogden...

Peel apart the layers and at the root of it all is white male supremacy — by any means necessary.

by tastyface

4/2/2025 at 7:32:12 PM

The "What [the political spectrum] Actually Is" graph shows more independent thinkers to be unintentional moderates. The chart is a claim that independence leads to moderation. I deny that. The most independently minded thinkers I know frequently drift off into extremes where most tribes dare not tread. The tribalists are so moderate in comparison that I would turn that christmas tree upside down.

by delichon

4/2/2025 at 8:14:52 PM

this was based off Paul Graham's piece: https://www.paulgraham.com/mod.html

where individual views may hit extremes, but the average of those views will be in the middle for independent thinkers

his essay explains it better, though I do agree there should be some dots on either end and up high

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 1:05:06 PM

Extreme views seem to scale most with education. Those highly decoupled from either tribe can be educated as well, but does seem more common with those less politically engaged. I am optimistic about the resurgence of an "abundance" agenda pushed by center-left Liberals.

> The most independently minded thinkers I know frequently drift off into extremes where most tribes dare not tread.

They've found another tribe.

by lanfeust6

4/3/2025 at 11:58:06 AM

When did discussing politics with your community become a bad thing? In fact that's the primary place you should talk politics, share new ideas and hone your views. If more people did this they wouldn't be getting radicalized by online bots.

by paxys

4/3/2025 at 1:41:48 PM

Discussing politics was fine up until John stewart era.

His comedy is about playing an out of context short clip, make funny face, cheap insult, and laugh track.

But how that plays out in political discussions is that 1 side wont have discussions and just repeats cheap insults. Which results in Trump getting into power.

Better yet, this 1 side who cant discuss politics then constantly hides away. Leaving their viewpoint unexpressed and further losing position.

by incomingpain

4/2/2025 at 6:18:04 PM

> when someone asks "who did you vote for"

I find it astonishing that anyone would ask this. The only time I've ever been asked this question has been by pollsters. In my social circle, anyway, the taboo on this question is very strong.

by JohnFen

4/3/2025 at 5:37:52 PM

It's not that shocking. It makes a really good short hand question to find out where someone is politically. You could spend ten hours discussing what the perfect immigration system looks like or you could ask who they voted for and get a baseline to go off of. The question only removes nuance if you stop right after.

by jajuuka

4/2/2025 at 6:19:53 PM

Thanks for reading!

Yeah it seems there is less of a taboo among my friends, despite a strong tilt in one political direction.

I suspect this is because most people assume everyone shares the same opinion in our state

by shw1n

4/2/2025 at 7:02:57 PM

Well, in my group, there's no taboo on telling people your political opinions and voting behavior, only on asking (because it's nobody else's business unless you choose to make it so). So in practice, I know the political stances of most in my social circle.

by JohnFen

4/2/2025 at 6:27:57 PM

Most people in the majority, you mean?

by stretchwithme

4/2/2025 at 6:32:06 PM

yes, I believe so

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 9:43:32 AM

I sometimes grin and say "it's a secret ballot" and how they react to that can be revealing.

by thinkingemote

4/2/2025 at 8:17:23 PM

A friend lamented in 2016 "If I vote for X I'll lose my friends. If I vote for Y I'll upset my family."

I reminded the voter of the secret ballot and the ability to just lie.

"Tell them what you think they want to hear", was my advice

by readthenotes1

4/2/2025 at 6:38:58 PM

I just try and imagine people having this debate in 1932 Germany.

by stouset

4/3/2025 at 4:51:57 AM

It's a good point but the flip side is not every point in time is 1932 Germany.

How do we keep a democracy where ideas we don't agree with can still be implemented if there's a majority (assuming minority rights are protected reasonably well) while at the same time ensuring we don't end up with democracy being used as a tool to get a totalitarian regime.

For a more recent example we can look maybe at Türkiye.

Preventing ideas that are still within the boundary of a democracy from being implemented is not democracy either.

The US e.g. has a Supreme Court and a constitution. Presumably as long as that court is functional and the constitution is applied then all is good?

Unfortunately I'm not familiar enough with Germany's fall into fascism and whether there was some sort of watershed moment where it was clear that something was broken and could still have been remediated.

by YZF

4/3/2025 at 4:56:40 AM

>The US e.g. has a Supreme Court and a constitution. Presumably as long as that court is functional and the constitution is applied then all is good?

Have we got some news for you

by lovich

4/3/2025 at 4:02:11 PM

> Unfortunately I'm not familiar enough with Germany's fall into fascism and whether there was some sort of watershed moment where it was clear that something was broken and could still have been remediated.

Fascism is an easy sell when it's immediately preceded by the Weimar Republic.

by seanw444

4/2/2025 at 6:36:25 PM

[flagged]

by ninetyninenine

4/2/2025 at 7:08:48 PM

> Are you really astonished by this?

Yes, because it's literally not a thing that I see happen. It seems like a terribly intrusive question to ask, and I certainly wouldn't ever feel comfortable asking anyone.

> What your "social group" does is outside the norm.

Perhaps now, but myself and most of my social group are old enough that it absolutely was the norm when we were younger. I was unaware that this was a thing that had changed.

> They are using ignorance to maintain tribal unity

Certainly not, since most know each other's political stances through the ordinary course of interacting with each other over the years.

> My guess is that your actually not astonished at all.

You guess wrong, so your personal attack here is powerless.

> pretending you're unaware of how abnormally impartial your group is

I never claimed my social circle was impartial at all, let alone "abnormally impartial". You're reading things into my statements that aren't there.

by JohnFen

4/2/2025 at 7:34:08 PM

[flagged]

by ninetyninenine

4/2/2025 at 7:41:31 PM

> Saying you're pretending is not a personal attack.

Saying I'm pretending is the same thing as saying that I'm lying. But it doesn't really matter either way. Your claims about what's in my head are mistaken. You are, of course, free to think anything you like.

by JohnFen

4/2/2025 at 7:47:58 PM

>Saying I'm pretending is the same thing as saying that I'm lying. But it doesn't really matter either way. Your claims about what's in my head are mistaken. You are, of course, free to think anything you like.

Correct, I think you're lying. But that's an extreme way to put it. You're more humble bragging.

Again, it wasn't an attack. Even if I say you're lying it's not an attack either. I'm just stating what I'm thinking.

by ninetyninenine

4/2/2025 at 7:55:57 PM

Ordinarily, this is where I'd leave it (a real discussion is impossible if one side thinks the other isn't being honest), but I'm really curious...

You've used the term "humble bragging" twice now. What in my statements do you think counts as a brag? I was just saying what my personal experience is, and I can't think of what I've said that would be anything to brag about, humble or otherwise. My experience is just my experience, not some kind of superior one.

by JohnFen

4/2/2025 at 9:50:56 PM

I think asking another person or a friend who they voted for is not really "astonishing". It felt like you were using that to sort of show off your position as someone who both would never do that and hangs out with people who don't do that. It's like the position established in the article was "obvious" because you're "superior". That was the slight tone I was sensing.

by ninetyninenine

4/3/2025 at 6:21:00 PM

Well, your read couldn't possibly be more wrong. I don't think my situation is anything better than anyone else's, so there's nothing to "show off". Your mindreading machine is broken.

But you think I'm a liar, so there's no point in talking about this any further. Thanks for your response.

by JohnFen

4/3/2025 at 7:53:52 PM

Agreed, I still think your lying. Thank you as well.

by ninetyninenine

4/2/2025 at 6:30:58 PM

On one hand, it feels like this question is a lot more relevant than ever. It's easier to ignore politics when each side doesn't see the other as an existential threat to their way of life.

Like it would be easy not to ask someone's religion when there isn't a 35% chance they're going to say "extremist martyr".

But I don't ask this question if I don't think I know the answer already, and I only ask it with people I think I can have a conversation with.

by unethical_ban

4/2/2025 at 6:28:23 PM

In my friend group it's clear as day: either you voted to kill and deport other people in the friend group or you didn't. Pretty obvious the group would like to know if you're secretly interested in their demise.

by voxl

4/2/2025 at 6:42:32 PM

If you’re sure you already know what other people think, I guess there’s not much point in asking them their opinions? You’re not going to listen to their answers anyway.

All you really want to know is what category to put them in.

by skybrian

4/2/2025 at 7:10:47 PM

[flagged]

by voxl

4/2/2025 at 7:34:40 PM

> Voting for Donald Trump is unarguably an evil action in my book.

I'm not sure why I'm bothering, but I'll bite.

I didn't vote for the guy, don't like the guy, never have.

Trying to understand _why_ people _did_ vote for him is much more important than declaring half the country (really like 30-35% of the country, more people didn't vote than did vote for a specific candidate) evil.

If we need to assign blame, Biden should have dropped out long before he did so the democrats could have found their next Obama, or something.

Or maybe, just maybe, people were desperate for a change and they were manipulated into a false sense of illogical hope.

The question is, why did they need hope? What was so wrong, in their mind, that we all ended up here?

Or, just declare them evil and hold a useless sense of moral superiority. This solves nothing, but I suppose it makes you feel better.

by dgfitz

4/3/2025 at 3:28:34 AM

I’m not I the states and only see America through the media and social media like this.

You ask why did they need hope, do you have an answer why did they need hope? What’s so bad in America that people could be manipulated as you put it.

It feels a like a repeat of Brexit, where people vote against there own material gains to punish others because that’s the quickest high they can get https://youtu.be/GPgatTnVvVY

by ListeningPie

4/3/2025 at 4:40:07 AM

Brexit is a good example. I think many people just can't extrapolate/predict the results of their actions and understand the policy (assuming politicians are even honest about it in the first place). For most objective smart people Brexit seemed terrible (hey lemme reinforce my ego a little) but expecting your average person to be able to understand that is tough. Also there is a parallel universe somewhere where Brexit maybe has a positive outcome. These things aren't fully deterministic. Similarly people always seem to buy the immigration crime and jobs schtick. And it's also not false that if you open your borders to a stream of people it is likely to change what your country looks like. There's a reason most countries don't have completely open borders and give everyone citizenship the day they set their foot past the border.

What's so bad in America? You'll be surprised how many people have hard lives in America. A lot. And I think when it's bad there, it's really bad.

by YZF

4/3/2025 at 5:40:23 AM

Okay, but I've known a lot of people in America who've had fucking terrible lives--with the same kinds of problems that Trump voters have--and didn't vote for Trump.

I mean what's your point here? Okay, so this guy I know had a terrible life and now he's a Trumper--you want me to say it's just okay that he wants to kill my trans friends in a very literal way (as in he's accumulating guns, touts the "kill your local pedophile" slogan, and openly states that trans people are pedophiles)? Sure, I can empathize with the guy having lost everything when he was younger, but empathy doesn't mean we have to ignore the danger he poses.

by kerkeslager

4/3/2025 at 4:12:24 AM

Or... Trump isn't evil, he loves America and is doing the things he said the President should do since the 1980s. People who blanket think Trump is evil are victims of propaganda. People who voted for him are the ones paying attention.

Trump on Oprah in 1988 https://youtu.be/SEPs17_AkTI?si=odkWs3urOu0xq2nX

by hattmall

4/3/2025 at 7:40:36 AM

Most Trump supporters are pretty explicit that making people like me feel bad is their primary goal. There's a lot who just want Mass Deportations Now, and a handful of hard single-issue voters on something or another, but the cruelty is the most common thread. The Republican party is right now selling official merchandise (https://shop.gop.com/products/liberal-tears-mug) celebrating the fact that they've successfully upset me.

Why should I believe that they're disguising some secret, more sympathetic motivation? I spent a long time hoping that was the case, because I don't want to believe that so many people favor inflicting harm for its own sake, but there's a point where trying to understand someone in terms I find reasonable becomes falsely putting my own ideas in their mouth.

by SpicyLemonZest

4/3/2025 at 5:26:47 AM

I'm not voxl, but I do want to point out that he didn't declare anyone evil. He declared an action evil (the action of voting for Donald Trump).

That's an important distinction to me because I believe people can change and start choosing better actions.

But, a whole lot of people haven't changed, still support Trump, and until that changes, those people are dangerous.

And sure, we can empathize with the reasons that got them to do that, but it doesn't follow that we should just pretend what they did was okay, especially is they continue to do harmful things.

by kerkeslager

4/2/2025 at 8:40:21 PM

I said it was an evil action, I didn't call them evil. This is the standard essentialism fallacy of morality. Doing an evil thing does not make your inherently evil. Holding slaves in 1800s is evil, but I don't think the people are inherently evil.

I have a pretty good understanding of why people didn't vote, the block I care about a lot more. The people that did vote for Trump specifically either are ride or die conservative, fell victim to misinformation, or are otherwise uneducated.

Trying to say that Biden and the DNC is "too blame" for someone picking a president that is happy sending citizens to an El Salvador prison is something. I expect a bit more from the electorate myself, and think they should take some accountability for their own mistakes.

by voxl

4/3/2025 at 5:07:41 AM

I'm a Trump hater. I'd vote for a jar of mayonnaise before voting for him. I think he'll be one of the most impactful presidents in US history for terrible reasons.

> The people that did vote for Trump specifically either are ride or die conservative, fell victim to misinformation, or are otherwise uneducated.

But this take is very dismissive of Trump voters, trying to find an easy way to avoid the conclusion that the majority of them are sane and rational people who liked what he was saying. Perhaps because it's an uncomfortable truth.

While I admittedly despise Trump, I'm under no illusions that I'm somehow meaningfully better or superior than those who support him.

by not_a_bot_4sho

4/3/2025 at 8:11:06 AM

If you're sane and rational and decided that you liked Trump's promises (with "rational" implying that you were actually listening to what he'd do, and not blindly accepting his nonsense about "I'll make everything perfect immediately!"), that leaves only the possibility that you're evil. Or a Russian operative, I suppose.

His promises on things he can actually do are exclusively for things that are wantonly destructive and incomprehensibly stupid (tariffs, mass layoffs), hateful and incomprehensibly evil (mass deportations without due process), or straight up treason (pardoning J6 insurrectionists, breaking alliances). If you voted for this person, you have to either be so stupid that you believe his obvious lies, or so evil that the things that aren't lies are things you like.

by GeneralMayhem

4/3/2025 at 9:49:53 AM

Many people who voted for tribe X voted for tribe Y a few years back. Have these people irredeemably changed in your eyes? Are they stupid for doing so? Is it possible for stupid, easily believing people to choose tribe X again? Does it make their stupidity disappear?

Does choosing a correct tribe increase intelligence and reduce gullibility?

One increasing view we hear today is of the "uneducated ignorant malleable masses". Should we think of our fellow tribe members this way?

The question being asked by people in tribes are "what to do with stupid/evil people" and history shows examples of tribes attempts to answer that.

by thinkingemote

4/3/2025 at 10:32:30 AM

I don't think you're disagreeing with me. The comment I responded to says that calling Trump voters ignoramuses was -

> trying to find an easy way to avoid the conclusion that the majority of them are sane and rational people who liked what he was saying.

My point is that to vote Republican in 2024 you must either be insane, irrational, or outright evil. It doesn't make you that way, it reveals that you already were.

> Many people who voted for tribe X voted for tribe Y a few years back. Have these people irredeemably changed in your eyes?

I think that Biden->Trump voters, or Obama->Trump voters, are incredibly stupid or short-sighted. There is no good reason to have done that. If you were a consistent Republican voter you might instead be a selfish racist piece of shit, but if you've switched from the Democrats in recent years the only option I have is to assume you're a gullible idiot.

And to be clear, yes, I think this is specific to the time we're in. I don't think I'd say this in 2000, for instance - it was pretty obvious that W was not going to be a good president, but he was not an incomprehensible choice, and you could imagine people who thought Gore's brand was tainted by association with Clinton's various forms of griminess. But Trump and his merry band of lunatics are not simply "the other tribe". They are an obvious and unprecedented threat no matter what your values are, unless your only value is breaking shit for the lulz.

by GeneralMayhem

4/2/2025 at 8:49:37 PM

I believe we are, at best, talking past each other. I don’t have the desire or energy to restate my points, given your response.

I hope you have an excellent rest of your day, take care.

by dgfitz

4/3/2025 at 4:29:37 PM

This sort of morally superior "trying to get the last word" thing is childish.

You didn't acknowledge the distinction between calling a person evil, and calling a person's actions evil. There isn't a way to "restate your point" that voxl said something he didn't say which would make it any less of a straw man argument.

You're not talking past him--he responded directly to what you said--you're just incorrect.

And you don't even have to admit you were incorrect: you can just have a little red-faced moment alone by yourself in front of your computer and then move on with your life without posting a response. And that would be better than posting this posturing thing where you pretend that some restatement of the singular incorrect point you made would be more correct if only it weren't so exhausting being correct.

by kerkeslager

4/3/2025 at 8:29:21 PM

Wow, I really struck a nerve huh?

I have no idea what point you think you just made.

I hope you also have an excellent rest of your day, take care.

by dgfitz

4/3/2025 at 5:08:14 AM

[flagged]

by kerkeslager

4/2/2025 at 6:37:52 PM

But I guess for prioritizing the happiness of the friend group, some amount of ignorance is needed if someone in the group is ultimately going to model the world on "they kill and deport or they don't" given enough information to make that declaration, and eventually a person on the other side is encountered?

I understand that some things can be more important than just having fun though, down to personal values.

"To be ignorant" sounds like a moral failing on its face, but I feel it is increasingly becoming required in some circumstances with the explosive amount of information available to subscribe to nowadays.

by doright

4/2/2025 at 6:41:57 PM

Keeping selfish assholes as friends is not a priority of mine.

by bongodongobob

4/2/2025 at 6:54:20 PM

I'm talking more about not bringing up politics to avoid giving too much information to people who will make up their own conclusions based on those facts and aren't amenable to change. And choosing not to bring up politics for the purpose of figuring out who out of the friend group is the selfish asshole.

by doright

4/2/2025 at 6:53:15 PM

See, this is the problem. People don’t vote for individual policies, they vote for candidates.

by dcrazy

4/3/2025 at 9:22:33 AM

Not really. Some people love the candidates but I suspect a lot of us vote against the other side more than for a candidate.

by ARandomerDude

4/3/2025 at 3:42:36 AM

correct, their vote says "I'm okay with everything this candidate says they'll do."

You can't cherry pick policies from a candidate and pretend your vote is not culpable for all the harm it inflicts.

by manfre

4/3/2025 at 7:40:52 AM

The shamelessness with which some commenters openly display the exact aggressive tribal behavior discussed in the article should be studied.

by bakugo

4/3/2025 at 6:44:09 PM

Ah, another apt time to mention one of my favorite papers, Michael Huemer's In Praise of Passivity. https://spot.colorado.edu/~huemer/papers/passivity.htm

Basically it argues the most moral thing in a democracy is to do nothing at all. You simply can never make a truly well informed decision over such a complex system, not even with several lifetimes of dedicated work towards it.

Generally speaking I don't take anyone's political opinion seriously unless they have read and have a cogent response to this paper. I'll gladly just let them yap away and think I agree with them, regardless of my actual views. It's sort of like not taking philosophers seriously unless they've considered the question of solipsism first.

by hiAndrewQuinn

4/3/2025 at 7:37:12 PM

"Things are hard, so don't try"?

Seems like it's just advocating for cowardice hiding behind moral grandstanding.

by eximius

4/3/2025 at 7:59:21 PM

> It's sort of like not taking philosophers seriously unless they've considered the question of solipsism first.

Solipsism only makes sense if you completely reject the concept of objective reality. It's mostly sophistry. The lack of being able to prove that reality exists beyond your own perceptions is not sufficient to prove that it does not, nor to make that assertion. See also "Simulation Theory".

by tristor

4/3/2025 at 8:24:39 PM

> I think there are two main reasons, the first being the sheer intellectual difficulty of crafting an informed political view leads people to tribalism out of convenience.

What's the difference between tribalism and deferring to experts on complex subjects, e.g. climate change? I have a deep skepticism of people who think they can personally reason through any complex topic from first principles. It shows a lack of humility and self-awareness. Nobody has the time to build that kind of expertise in every domain, and there is wisdom in deferring to the hard won experience of others. But the type to think they can reason through everything seems like the type to call this "tribal politics."

by Seattle3503

4/3/2025 at 2:31:40 PM

People do not change opinions because someone told them to. It has to be a result of a narrative with personal experiences. Which is why FAFO is still a big thing.

Hence, any effort trying to convince friends that blue is not green it is not gonna work. Sorry.

by whatever1

4/2/2025 at 6:46:08 PM

> a congregation member asking "you believe in god, right?"

That's a very good analogy.

For some, believing in god or not doesn't matter much and they'll go to church mostly to make friends and be part of a community.

For others, being expected (or not) to believe in God is a no go, and losing friends/family holding these expectations will be a price to pay.

We all have our boundaries, and disagreements on some specific topics will be out of them. Cutting friends/family with incompatible stances is just one instance of that IMHO, be it political, religious or anything else that matters enough.

by makeitdouble

4/2/2025 at 8:01:43 PM

appreciate it! (and thanks for reading)

yeah the religious enforcement is what always popped into my head when I watched it unfold

by shw1n

4/2/2025 at 6:35:06 PM

Something I try to remember when discussing politics or playing Scrabble: "You can be right, or you can have friends"

by greybox

4/3/2025 at 4:54:27 AM

Hah! One of mine:

I'd rather be right than popular, and I usually am.

by BLKNSLVR

4/2/2025 at 6:56:22 PM

great quote, I agree

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 10:20:15 AM

On average people are incapable of holding a moral position through to the end.

- Bad parenting is bad, we should have a permit for it --> are you ready to get denied the right to try having kids?

- Thou shalt not kill --> except those really bad people I don't like!

- Stealing is bad --> except when you're "starving"

Our perception of good and evil are multifaceted, with most of it happening in our background cognition.

There is a strange "mirror" stopping people from exchanging once a rift has opened. Someone else posited that it might be a fight or flight reaction.

I posit that our cognition is based on negation, and thus the shape of our tool impact our results.

by Nemrod67

4/3/2025 at 10:29:37 AM

Maybe. Killing or stealing for a reason doesn't make the action morally good, just less morally bad than the outcome it was intended to prevent. I've never heard the first parenting example.

by batch12

4/3/2025 at 3:44:28 PM

> And even with all this knowledge, can you empathize with both sides of common issues -- the poor renter vs struggling landlord? The tired worker vs underwater business owner? Rich vs poor, immigrant vs legacy, parent vs child -- the list goes on

To me having just two sides is a uniquely American way of thinking.

Between the renter and landlord there's the homeowner, between the tired worker and business owner there's the public sector/NGO/huge corporation worker/freelancer, rich and poor are relative terms which lie on a scale anyway.

Conflicts that actually have only two parties involved are rare and the very first thing one should do to be able to talk politics, is give up on the notion.

by Tade0

4/3/2025 at 11:29:19 AM

This paints a very binary picture. Either you are in or out. Part of this tribe, or this other tribe (ignorantly or not). The article seems to imply that people can't have opinions on political policies unless they are fully informed on not only global affairs but also philosophy and psychology.

I think reality is different - I don't think there are any absolutes that require "knowledge" of e.g. philosophy to get the "right" answer in politics. Instead the right answer (at least in western democracies) is what the people want, even if they are not fully informed.

I view it very much akin to trial by jury - there are highly informed and experienced judges, barristers, solicitors etc but ultimately it is down to the laymen in the jury to make a decision that they see as just. They might reach the "wrong" decision from the perspective of people who are fully informed on the legal processes and the law of the land etc, but that doesn't matter because it is the jury that makes the decision.

So it is for the electorate too.

I have no experience of voting in the US but it appears that a two-party system really stokes the "us Vs them" vibes. The only alternative you have is to totally switch sides. At least in European democracies there is often a plurality of parties to vote for. I've personally moved between the main 3 parties (and there are probably at least another 1 or 2 other minority parties that have different trajectories...) in the UK as my personal situation has changed over the years, and I think that is a very normal thing here.

by mattlondon

4/3/2025 at 5:43:58 PM

Agreed, this article feels like ego stroking. Especially with language like "truth seeking". It creates this fantasy that there is this level of consciousness that we can evolve to where we achieve complete knowledge of all subjects. There is a reason we have a democracy with multiple groups and multiple departments. Because no one person has all the answers or is right. We all bring our unique experiences and expertise together to create a better whole. At least that's the idea.

by jajuuka

4/3/2025 at 11:36:48 AM

I would note that trial by jury means a jury of your peers is being forced to become informed on a subject [if parties are arguing the facts of the case in good faith].

They are then rendering a judgement [in good faith].

by thrwaway438

4/3/2025 at 11:42:09 AM

On the facts of the case yes. But they are not expected to become experts in case law or legal precedent and history and philosophy etc.

When I have had to do jury service we have explicitly been told not to research anything about the case outside of the court room. Everything the jury bases their decisions on should only be what was discussed in the court room, and on your own lived experience.

by mattlondon

4/3/2025 at 4:12:07 PM

I think there should be a new rule that any time someone writes an article bragging about how he's† a badass independent thinker just like Paul Graham and Eliezer Yudkowsky, he must in the same article identify his major disagreements with Paul Graham and Elizer Yudkowsky. Because to me the authors of these articles seem exactly as tribal as mainstream political and religious groups, they just care about different things. Yeah, I shouldn't be able to guess your views on sex from your views on taxes, but I also shouldn't be able to guess your views on wokeness from your views on AI safety. Yet I can make both predictions with about equal accuracy.

† I have yet to see an article like this written by a woman.

by ComposedPattern

4/2/2025 at 7:07:00 PM

I believe in the future we will see a much more pronounced split between people who prefer reality to those who prefer un-reality.

Un-reality is the mediated, constructed "reality" that can be conjured up and perpetuated through mediums such as the Internet. It needs constant effort behind it to keep it going because it isn't tethered to actual experience. Un-reality is things like the hyper-partisan views on things that seem like they change on a whim, or extremist views on gender relations. It requires a tribalistic level of affiliation. It is something that has evolved to prize self-perpetuation (e.g. memes) over the views it claims to espouse. (This pattern of growth at all costs also occurs in other contexts, such as business.)

Reality, on the other hand, is the messy, boring, uncontrollable and unmediated thing we experience as humans. It is harder to transmit online because it isn't something that is easily swallowed, but it has a universal appeal to us as we recognize humanity in it. Reality has much bigger downs and ups than un-reality does, that's what makes us want to escape it sometimes. It also has really crappy truths and circumstances in it; there's no respawns or undo.

In some sense, this split already exists: fans of un-reality we often label as too online, implying that they prefer online life to actual life. I believe the biggest difference here lies in the preference for mediated vs unmediated interactions.

by mattgreenrocks

4/2/2025 at 9:10:30 PM

The entire problem is that both tribes think your comment applies to them.

We do not agree on what reality is

by mrguyorama

4/3/2025 at 6:44:45 AM

Who is "both" tribes? Why can there be only two? And why do you not think the parent is talking about both of those tribes compared to more moderate, less terminally-online people?

by Nursie

4/2/2025 at 6:30:11 PM

I think it's somewhat funny that two of the images in this blog post, the two signs, and the miner, are commonly used to mock faux intellectualism and a feeling of moral superiority.

by protonbob

4/2/2025 at 6:37:39 PM

I don't think it's a coincidence, but it also doesn't necessarily undermine their utility. In fact, I think a lot of images that are also used in a mocking context get there because they wind up being overused and over applied, in part because they're actually really good.

Another example of an illustration I like that is somewhat derided is the classic equity vs equality cartoon with the boxes[1]. I say this in spite of the fact that I generally find myself identifying more with equality as a baseline, and the simple reason is it's a good illustration of the potential pitfalls of overindexing on equality.

IMO It's all in how you use them. It's hard to avoid that useful metaphors/analogies often become overused and cliche.

[1]: https://interactioninstitute.org/illustrating-equality-vs-eq...

by jchw

4/2/2025 at 6:40:04 PM

yeah it's just a great image for making a bet that might fail imo (the miner one)

this reply nails it imo, some images just boil things down perfectly

by shw1n

4/2/2025 at 6:31:30 PM

I think it's ok to be hypocritical and have friends with different vastly political beliefs, in the end relationships; friendships, lovers, etc are not usually an outcome of rational behavior, so I don't mind having friends who are politically different because it's the unconscious connection that brought us together.

As long as there's respect that's what matters.

by forthwall

4/2/2025 at 6:33:54 PM

Politics aren’t the outcome of rational behavior either. The strongest belief systems that people have are instilled in them at a young age. Also, people can change.

by pokstad

4/2/2025 at 6:39:47 PM

Politics is more regional than any other single factor. Like religion.

You're highly unlikely to grow up Protestant in Israel just like you're highly unlikely to going to grow up with liberal views in Tennessee.

Second to geography is demographic. You're unlikely to support DEI if you're surrounded by 90% white people all the time, and you're unlikely to decry globalism after you've been exposed to large cities and dense population centers for a long time.

by zelon88

4/3/2025 at 6:42:48 AM

> you're highly unlikely to going to grow up with liberal views in Tennessee

Don't pretend like Nashville doesn't exist. It's very much rural very homogeneous areas versus more urban and diverse areas. It's much easier to label entire demographics as The Enemy and then vote to elect someone to attack The Enemy when you've literally never met The Enemy and just rely on what your news stations of choice tell you. Who The Enemy is changes. It's been women's suffrage and and civil rights. It's been "Mexicans" and Arabs and Gays and now Trans folk. But conservatives will literally always have The Enemy to rally against.

Growing up in more diverse areas means you're more likely to have met a Muslim who doesn't want to "kill or convert you" or a trans person who just wants to live a normal life in the best way they can, or a DACA recipient just trying to make a life in the only place they have ever known as home. Knowing these people builds empathy for outgroups. The key trait conservatives seem to lack. More they seem incapable of comprehending it. So "liberals" can't support "illegal immigrants" because they actually want the best outcome for people. That's a concept conservatives can't comprehend. So it must be that liberals support them for all the "illegal voting" that "illegal immigrants" are doing. Never mind that these people cannot vote. Never mind that if these people could vote, they are far more religious and far more likely to ascribe to the conservative social political agenda. It makes absolutely no sense that "liberals" support "illegal immigrants" to capture their votes. But that's a hard fact to conservatives.

by tstrimple

4/2/2025 at 6:34:11 PM

Different brains having different experiences reach different conclusions.

If two people don't have some different opinions, at least one of them isn't thinking for themselves.

by stretchwithme

4/2/2025 at 8:16:19 PM

yeah I tried to include this via

"It’s not that truth-seeking is a requirement for friendship, far from it."

agree (and thanks for reading)

by shw1n

4/2/2025 at 11:56:45 PM

In the country where I live, the problem is that it became much of a religious question. People feel like one candidate represents values different than mine, and that by not aligning with them, I'm not an ally. I don't have friends with such different values, but managing family has become a big problem during these times. It's very hard, for example, hearing your mother-in-law defending a change in the constitution that would forbid women to have an abortion, even when raped and at any time of pregnancy, when you have a small daughter. That person is actively trying to make the world a horrible place for my family, according to my values and honestly any sane person.

EDIT: typo.

by marcuschong

4/2/2025 at 6:40:53 PM

Name-calling by commentators dehumanised the debates. I still don't understand why it is considered OK.

"They do it" should not be enough of a reason, but it affects youtube income for individuals, so let the market work, I guess? /sarcasm

by pcblues

4/3/2025 at 2:21:36 PM

A lot of the comments in this thread show how difficult it can be to talk about politics. So many strawmen arguments and ad hominims.

by jccalhoun

4/3/2025 at 3:13:33 PM

Cut a "rationalist centrist moderate" and a fascist who doesn't want to get cancelled because he still needs VC funding and Linkedin connections bleeds.

US politics has been increasingly polarized into positions congruent with facts and policy and our traditional ideals, and positions associated with a general stance of grievance, with an insistent selfishness, with anti-empathy, anti-intellectualism, with "palingenetic ultranationalism". This has been a test of your ideals, of your humanity. It wasn't very hard.

Yes, there is often a lot of nuanced truth in the middle of any argument. But less now, in politics, than in a long, long time. Only a very particular sort of person walks into a liberated Auschwitz and starts shouting "Both sides are too extreme and I'm better than them!" from the rooftops.

Speaking as somebody who spent a lot of time there: A lot of the tropes in the "rationalist" community are inherently conservative-pointing, and it's a general prerequisite for participating there that you have a coherent base of progressive terminal ideals and an attitude suited towards introspection and iteration of your beliefs. Because otherwise you go from zero to Nietzschean ubermensch to Nazi ubermensch to Musk/Thiel brownshirt in no time, having weaponized everything present there to support your priors and idly expand your confidence.

by mapt

4/2/2025 at 6:39:52 PM

Further, I mute and unfollow aggressively any family or friends that just constantly post political news/rants etc from Facebook and other social media platforms.

by daft_pink

4/3/2025 at 3:32:38 AM

Excellent post.

It wasn’t always like this. I remember when you could be pro-gun and pro-environment—and still have thoughtful, respectful conversations with people who held different beliefs.

Today, if you’re not fully aligned with every talking point of a political party, you’re instantly labeled either a fascist or a communist. And sometimes it borders on absurd: the moment party leadership shifts its stance, the whole tribe flips with it. It wasn’t that long ago that Republicans staunchly opposed tariffs. Now? They’re all in.

My question is: What changed? When did we become so tribal—and why?

by tlogan

4/3/2025 at 5:11:31 PM

From what I've seen, tribalism is core to innate human nature. It's always been there, and until human nature can be edited like a spreadsheet, it always will be.

What's changed now is how visible it's become and how much easier it is to mass organize people and split up into echo chambers that favor a specific viewpoint.

Before, people were not well organized. The internet has been a revolution in spreading views and allowing like minded people to hang out together. Turns out that's not always for the best. But there's no going back. It's only going to get worse until something happens that unites people more than it divides them.

by LinuxAmbulance

4/3/2025 at 3:20:33 PM

IMO it was technology allowing more viewpoints to be expressed. First with more than 3 TV stations, then of course the internet. Before that transition, everyone was mostly part of one tribe, because mass media was mostly homogeneous. After, it was increasingly easy to find tribes that fit your exact viewpoints, and reject other sources of information

by ranger207

4/3/2025 at 4:09:45 PM

> It wasn’t that long ago that Republicans staunchly opposed tariffs. Now? They’re all in.

Which Republicans are we talking? The old guard that held leadership positions for decades, making the decisions while most of the public weren't invested? Or the new guard that hijacked the Republican party after the population started getting invested after recent events?

Every "conservative" I know is in favor of protectionism, and tariffs are a strong manifestation of that. Don't conflate the get-what-you-get leadership, and the disenfranchised voterbase for having been the same people.

by seanw444

4/3/2025 at 6:15:46 PM

Both Regan and George H.W. Bush were anti tariffs and pro free market. I believe the change happened with Trump. Good interview about that is here [1]

[1] https://www.npr.org/2024/12/19/nx-s1-5215953/how-the-gop-wen...

by tlogan

4/3/2025 at 8:12:50 PM

And most of the conservatives I know that are actually politically-aware are critical of both. For many reasons. Bush for his wars and the Patriot Act, and Reagan for his anti-2A policies and eternal blue-ification of California.

by seanw444

4/3/2025 at 3:44:26 AM

A combination of factors:

1. Apolitical people are now political

2. News stations running more opinion pieces than actual newsvand being selective about said news

3. Seeing politics as an identity similar to a belief instead of a state of mind

by 0dayz

4/3/2025 at 3:37:04 AM

Large scale divergence in the two human moralities: social morality (rules for people around us to protect the community, largely coded liberal) and personal morality (moral intuitions for how to keep you and your immediate family safe). The two have become at odds with each other so everyone feels intensely and uncompromisingly threatened by those who ascribe more to the other, leading to two groups that can no longer even 'treat with the enemy' much less collaborate on their mutual preservation. This was aided along by a whole lot of largely unchecked fearmongering because it turns out that that sells views, clicks, and ratings.

(and possibly also a general dumbification of everything due to bad education combined with lowering social standards for who is allowed to have a public voice and be take seriously; confusingly thus was one of the points of a standard of decorum, because it served as a filter on who was intelligent enough to be a thought leader.)

by ajkjk

4/3/2025 at 8:12:20 AM

People were always tribal. You just call out a group to be evil. And it takes just a little bit of propaganda and people will ignore any rational arguments and start harassing a group.

Witch-hunts (last conviction in Europe was 1944), jews, communists, americans, non-americans, all sorts of religious groups, ... history is full of that.

One thing that changed recently is that nowadays propaganda is very organized and well funded. I also think there was a pretty calm period for a few decades (but only in certain regions of the planet). In the cold war period the tribes were very fixed and the evil was always far away, so locally not much happened.

by adornKey

4/3/2025 at 2:17:35 PM

Nice article, the comments in here also reinforced the title.

by vorbits

4/2/2025 at 6:31:39 PM

One thing I definitely don't do anymore is discuss politics with any friends or family ONLINE.

It's just not worth it. Publish or tweet something if you have something to say and want to reach a lot of people. Talking to ONE person and risking your relationship has a lousy cost/benefit ratio.

by stretchwithme

4/2/2025 at 6:39:08 PM

How do you avoid the pain of someone expressing a particularly hurtful political opinion (i.e. entire class of ppl should die) if you don't filter relationships by political beliefs?

I generally keep people's political opinions at arms length, as some relationships are worth the pain or lack of depth. But it has caused unforseen pain at times, and hurts when relations from different spheres interact negatively.

by cobertos

4/2/2025 at 6:41:21 PM

By interacting with the positive aspects of the person and ignoring or disengaging from the political opinions I don't like. If they want to kill jews or whatever, they have the right to that opinion, doesn't bother me so long as I'm not obliged to partake. I might engage the view but if neither of us are benefitting from the conversation there is no point in continuing down that particular path.

by ty6853

4/2/2025 at 6:43:19 PM

There are opinions which should cause one to seriously consider ending their friendship. I would hope “wanting to kill Jews” is on pretty much everyone’s list.

by dcrazy

4/2/2025 at 8:08:07 PM

It undoubtedly is. I have to assume the GP slipped up with a really badly chosen example, since their point is otherwise pretty middle of the road.

by blast

4/2/2025 at 7:03:26 PM

It seems to me that the bad qualities of a person that would cause them to embrace genocide should be evident long before you get into a friendship that you would need to end.

by kcplate

4/2/2025 at 7:14:04 PM

You would think, but unfortunately the world is full of duplicitous people.

by dcrazy

4/2/2025 at 7:38:43 PM

This extends to actions vs beliefs too.

F.ex. one of my most altruistic and charitable friends is a Trump supporter

She's run a Christmas time charity for 10 years, solely out of the goodness of her heart, to ensure that families in our community who are struggling get what they need for a happier holiday in tough times.

It's a non-trivial 6 months of work, between making prizes for donation-driving lotteries, attending events and promoting, and then finding the most cost-effective deals for the families.

So I choose to say "She's a better person than most I know, in some ways, and disagrees with me in others. Worth friendship."

by ethbr1

4/2/2025 at 9:05:04 PM

Hmm, sounds about right. I still feel like being around people when they express such radical beliefs reflects poorly on me and hurts me in some unexplainable way.

When challenging such beliefs I find some are hyperbole or a side effect of group-think. Rarely are they genuine, but when they are it's the most worrying. And that's usually when I stop engaging that line of thought.

by cobertos

4/2/2025 at 6:48:26 PM

That sounds so bleak.

What’s the endgame to this approach? Seems to me, folks with genocidal thoughts and feelings would find more positive reinforcement amongst themselves and less negative reinforcement everywhere else. Not great for the “genocide is bad” theory.

by TimorousBestie

4/2/2025 at 6:50:40 PM

The negative reinforcement is supposed to be when they actually attempt to unlawfully kill others, a 9mm bullet goes through their head. Until then, they have the right to their opinion.

It's hard to imagine isolating them from counter points is going to mitigate their position.

by ty6853

4/2/2025 at 7:05:35 PM

I think there are ways a friend can be toxic without threatening death. This friend may encourage you to isolate from your jewish friends, or explicitly make your jewish friends feel unwelcome by saying slurs while in group settings. This friend is explicitly making you in the position where you have to isolate your own friend groups from each other to "keep the peace", i.e. you are forced to do the labor, instead of them, to handle the harm they are causing.

Like we all know a guy who we can't keep around because he keeps saying unhinged stuff, or creeps on any women, or whatever it is he does that ruins it for everyone else.

So I think it's more nuanced than just refusing to cut off heinous viewpoints. It's also how this person injects this view in your existing friend ecosystem.

by KittenInABox

4/3/2025 at 3:49:00 PM

[dead]

by const_cast

4/2/2025 at 9:11:06 PM

[flagged]

by ToucanLoucan

4/2/2025 at 6:36:30 PM

yeah I sorta mention it in the footnotes, I find writing a nice medium for this because there's less gaslighting / interrupting

so I guess I agree to some degree

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 2:27:36 PM

My personal strategies... 1. I try to be indirect on what I think and just describe why some people think one opinion versus another. So I try not to convince people. 2. I try to stick to "is this going to work?" Style arguments when I do state my opinion. I acknowledge when my preferred party does or says something I disagree with. 3. I avoid getting bogged down with "do you agree with x y z??" Controversies that may be anecdotal and I'm not opinionated or familiar with. So I try not to argue the outage of the day.

This generally keeps me from arguing with relatives and in-laws, and on this site. So usually I can discuss differences without things going crazy.

by havblue

4/3/2025 at 5:33:32 AM

I enjoy debating politics in the way that others enjoy playing chess or a friendly game of bowling. But when the other party gets wrapped around the axle, I don't debate with them anymore. Unfortunately, most seem to be in the latter camp.

by WalterBright

4/3/2025 at 7:30:33 AM

I can agree with parts of this article, but I believe it's missing a large part of the puzzle.

The author implicitly assumes that the constraints of our society are fixed and that it's therefore possible to determine which political systems are objectively better or worse. We should be doing that research (like astronomers trying to determine how the universe works) instead of religiously supporting ideological positions.

I fundamentally disagree with that assumption. I think we behave the way we do in large part due to the ideological principles we were raised with. This can be confirmed by observing various closed-off societies sometimes operating on principles that seem completely bonkers to most of us.

If you teach people capitalism/socialism, you build a capitalistic/socialistic system. It's impossible to live inside that system and objectively determine whether it's good or bad, let alone better or worse than other systems.

So in that context, I believe following an ideology is _not_ the opposite of thinking for yourself, as the author puts it. It is a conscious decision based on morality. You decide what your values are and you find a political option that aligns with them.

To be clear, that's still a very imperfect decision to make, many things can go wrong from that point on and I believe this is where the author is correct in many ways. We should reason about it constantly to make sure we're actually doing what we want to be doing and not just blindly repeating things.

by MatekCopatek

4/3/2025 at 5:31:49 PM

That seems overly reductive.

> It's impossible to live inside that system and objectively determine whether it's good or bad, let alone better or worse than other systems.

I mean, if someone says "Let's pollute the rivers!" and another person says "Let's not pollute the rivers!", that's a pretty clear cut objectively good and bad position. Or "Let's put people in prison if they jaywalk.", etc.

That's not to say there are no positions that have a clear cut good or bad outcome that can be measured beforehand. For example, putting a tax on sugary drinks. Maybe it will work, maybe it won't, but you have no way of being sure beforehand, because you can't A/B test reality and the complexity of the system is such that you can't accurately predict human behavior at a large scale.

But the existence of positions that don't have a clear answer that can be determined ahead of time doesn't mean there's no objective way to determine whether it's good or bad, just that we don't have the tooling to do so at this point in time.

by LinuxAmbulance

4/3/2025 at 8:57:24 AM

I agree that "tribalism" exists. I'd add that sometimes political disagreements are actually differences in morality. And there is no way you can persuade someone to change their moral beliefs. Everyone accepts their moral beliefs as "axioms". But I still believe it's worth discussing politics in order to learn what kind of person someone is and their morality.

by cmitsakis

4/3/2025 at 2:57:41 PM

Why I don't discuss politics with Hacker News (6,000 comments)

by 01HNNWZ0MV43FF

4/2/2025 at 6:14:44 PM

Wrote this after noticing myself repeating the same conversational pattern over the years w/ friends, across the political spectrum

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 9:58:58 AM

I've noticed this too, on average people are incapable of holding a moral position through to the end.

- Bad parenting is bad, we should have a permit for it --> are you ready to get denied the right to try having kids?

- Thou shalt not kill --> except those really bad people I don't like!

- Stealing is bad --> except when you're "starving"

Our perception of good and evil are multifaceted, with most of it happening in our background cognition.

There is a strange "mirror" stopping people from exchanging once a rift has opened. Someone else posited that it might be a fight or flight reaction.

I posit that our cognition is based on negation, and thus the shape of our tool impact our results.

by Nemrod67

4/2/2025 at 6:37:18 PM

Online or in person?

by stretchwithme

4/2/2025 at 8:15:25 PM

mostly in-person actually

by shw1n

4/2/2025 at 6:36:48 PM

I don’t discuss politics with anyone anymore. Just wish I had made that decision 30 years ago…

by whobre

4/3/2025 at 3:43:15 AM

To have an informed view on any given issue, one needs to:

1. understand economics, game theory, philosophy, sales, business, military strategy, geopolitics, sociology, history, and more

2. be able to understand and empathize with the various (and often opposing) groups involved in a topic

3. detect and ignore their own bias

1) is a lot of work. Just finding out what's going on is hard. Partly because news-gathering organizations are far more thinly staffed than they used to be. There aren't enough reporters out there digging, which is hard work. There are too many pundits and influencers blithering. Read the output of some news outlet, cross out "opinion" items and stories based on press releases or press conferences, and there's not much left. The Economist, the Wall Street Journal, Bloomberg, the New York Times, and Reuters still have people who dig for facts. Beyond that, reporters are thin on the ground. If you can only read one thing, read the Economist for a year. Each week they cover some country in detail, and over a year, most of the world gets a close look. (Although at the moment, their China coverage is weak, because their reporters were kicked out of China for doing too much digging.)

Background is necessary. Many pundits seem to lack much of a sense of history. Currently, understanding the runups to WWI and WWII is very useful. Understand what Putin is talking about when he references Catherine the Great and Peter the Great. Geography matters. Look at Ukraine in Google Earth and see that most of the current fighting is over flat farmland and small towns, much like Iowa. Look at Taiwan and realize how narrow and exposed an island it is. There's no room to retreat after an invasion, unlike Ukraine.

As for empathy, there's a huge split in America between the areas above and below 700 people per square mile. Above 1,500 per square mile, almost always blue. Below 400 per square mile, almost always red.[1] This effect dwarfs race, religion, ideology, or income level. It's very striking and not well recognized in public discourse. There's a minimum viable population density below which small towns stop working as self-supporting entities. (On the ground, this shows up as empty storefronts on Main Street and a closed high school.)

On bias, there are many people in the US whose lot has been slowly getting worse for decades now. That's the underlying source of most US political problems.

[1] https://www.cookpolitical.com/analysis/national/national-pol...

by Animats

4/3/2025 at 8:04:14 PM

"Unbiased" aggregators like Ground News, MSM, and the right blogosphere like Joe Rogan are doing their best to normalize dragging the Overton window to the right with haste. Progressives have a handful of obscure, disconnected, largely-unknown reputable sources with a wasteland of as many or more former progressives and once-promising journalist and journalist-adjacent personalities.

by anon6362

4/3/2025 at 11:58:45 AM

Author thinks they are the lone person stuck in the middle between two tribes, but actually they are part of a third tribe that fallaciously believes that it is possible to write better policy, if only we took the time to study reality more and listen to more people and apply more reason etc. In short, Author distinguishes between the two established tribes (in which people make a very limited emotional engagement with the issues) and their tribe (in which people make a stronger emotional engagement). This is a fallacy because:

  * It is not reasonable to expect most people to make strong emotional investments into voting choices that have little direct effect on their lives, and indeed we have a representative democracy rather than a direct democracy to recognize that reality 
  * Reality is far, far more complicated than can be summarized in journalism or articles; many researchers spend their entire careers attempting to learn deeply about *one* area, let alone many areas; much pertinent information is non-public. Policies that are effective in one community are completely counter-productive in another. Believing that you are The Exception and that you Know The Right Way To Run The Country because you "do your research" is the height of hubris.
People will seek out good leadership. People will switch leaders when their current leadership fails to make them happy. Good leaders defer to experts, each in their own domain, who may make imperfect decisions and other mistakes but nonetheless make well-intentioned efforts to improve over time and pass on their knowledge so that future generations can learn from their mistakes. All else is natural variance due to human imperfection.

by solatic

4/3/2025 at 8:57:46 AM

You should not discuss politics with friends.

You should however discuss politics with close friends -- they probably got close to you because you both share a worldview or they like hearing your worldview (even if it differs from yours).

Closeness means more sharing. That always comes with risks and rewards.

by sidkshatriya

4/3/2025 at 2:41:41 PM

I think the bigger problem is the tribal ape brains have been programmed by history's most sophisticated propaganda engines 24/7.

by sys32768

4/3/2025 at 6:35:18 PM

I was really enjoying the article until I realized there is zero attribution to the book _Thinking in Bets_, which IMO this is obviously heavily influenced by.

by abbadadda

4/3/2025 at 6:37:47 PM

But there IS this?

> [13] Not a reference to the book, which I haven’t read — this is just a phrase I use

Seems to me an unwillingness to cite / give proper attribution to Annie Duke and the book, which is super weird? At any rate I’d highly recommend the book.

by abbadadda

4/3/2025 at 6:46:18 PM

The author specifically said he didn't ready the book.

by emursebrian

4/3/2025 at 11:00:39 AM

Tribalism really is the thing one has to individually overcome in order to gain some perspective, then maybe adhere to free thinking, before blooming as a free doer.

For me, it always was a voluntarily long and sinuous and silly and lonely path. It had to be.

An uncertain path as well, and one that was totally worth all the trouble it brought my way.

And as seducing as it is, the reality of crossing path with fellow free thinking/doing individuals always felt like falling for some other tribe.

Because in the end, that's what we do. While not following, we often become leaders of followers. How could it be otherwise is the only question left to answer.

by 8jef

4/3/2025 at 6:02:41 AM

This article seems to be saying that religions are tribal by nature because it's made up of humans, and humans are tribal by nature -- ok fair enough. But the subtext I'm getting is that people in religions are less self-aware of it than the author or the people they admire.

People being more interested in comfortable beliefs rather than true beliefs has always been a concern throughout Biblical history. But that doesn't mean it never went unchallenged.

For instance, regardless of what you think of the Bible, it's interesting that Isaiah has the following to say to Judah (emphasis mine) because it shows an ever-present problem with human nature.

    For they are a rebellious people, lying children, children unwilling to hear the instruction of the Lord;
    *who say to the seers, “Do not see,” and to the prophets, “Do not prophesy to us what is right; speak to us smooth things, prophesy illusions”*
And before someone responds with a de jure objection to say that "the instruction of the Lord" is not looking for truth, I just want to make it clear that that is out of the scope of my point. My point is that, de facto, in the context, a religious text is agreeing that it is bad to "tribe-up and truth-out."

Lastly, on a personal note, as a human Christian, I think I have the same biases to groupthink as any other person because I am human. But because Christianity has a reputation, I have found that throughout my life, I've had to work harder to really test (not validate) my beliefs because I am constantly being challenged and, ironically, often ended up more informed about both my beliefs and my interlocutors' beliefs.

by LordRatte

4/3/2025 at 6:06:51 AM

Actually I think people in traditional organized religions like Christianity are on the whole more self-aware than secular people who fall into the same religious behavior in random topics, because they acknowledge the "faith" component.

Sort of summarized by the sentence here:

"If someone is self-aware enough to consciously acknowledge their choice to remain in the bubble, that’s totally fair. I respect it like I’d respect anyone who chooses to participate in a more traditional religion. My issue is when this view is falsely passed off as an intellectually-driven one."

by shw1n

4/2/2025 at 6:51:09 PM

I think the groupthink and independent thought axes need to be flipped. Way more toeing the party line and groupthink near the center. The more fringe you get the more independent thought there is. It might be crazy and wrong but it's not groupthink.

by lispisok

4/3/2025 at 6:14:41 AM

politics (and the truth itself) have always been tribal. People discussed things and disagreed in public and that's how they managed to slightly influence each other.

Avoiding to discuss politics is cowardly. It distances people from each other because they maintain a fake facade, and they express their true selves and beliefs only online.

by seydor

4/3/2025 at 6:43:37 AM

I actually encourage discussion in the essay, as long as people are well-intentioned or until you hit a point of dogma

But if anyone is closed to the idea of an idea being wrong, no discussion can really be had

by shw1n

4/2/2025 at 6:48:35 PM

One thing I didn't see mentioned, and maybe this is part of being tribal, but politics is often not about the positions you take, but about the game theory of how you stay in power, and convince a group of people about the positions you take.

One thing I hate about the trump administration, and maybe all politics is fundamentally like this, is you can't really disagree with them. You can't really disagree with them because it's really hard to figure out what position they're taking. I find it makes discussing things with family really difficult. I can intellectually agree that "A nation should protect it's borders" and have a nuanced perspective on how much immigration is the right amount, but then I'm never going to square that with what the politicians are actually doing, right? We can't have a nuanced conversation with what the right immigration policy is, when the administration is deporting people without due process, or when the current administration says the problem with immigration is that Joe Biden let judges run wild in 2019.

by techpineapple

4/3/2025 at 1:03:54 AM

I personally think this is the right approach, where you can assign probabilities to the unknowns (the "thinking in bets" section)

Because then the discussions/research switch toward data and evidence, with the results downstream of those

Overall when people can agree "I understand stance 1 if the data says X, or stance 2 if the data says Y", and then all the energy goes into the data analysis, I consider that a successful conversation

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 4:40:45 AM

I have friends all over the political spectrum. I've read political philosophy ranging from Hegel, Marx, Foucault, Butler, Crenshaw, Gentile, Locke, Rawls, Friedman, Mises, Rand, ect.. I find myself actively engaging in political discussion frequently with these friends. The only friend I've stopped talking over politics were black block during the antifa riots. I viewed his actions as ultimately misguided and dangerous. I ultimately forgave him and now we are friends who actively debate policy in good faith.

It's easy to spot political tribalism - just reference the comments here. They ultimately misrepresent, and have never tried to understand, their opposition's political position. It's kind of sad because it allows them to be manipulated by propaganda and political powers much like my antifa friend.

by cyberjerkXX

4/3/2025 at 5:15:50 AM

> It's easy to spot political tribalism - just reference the comments here. They ultimately misrepresent, and have never tried to understand, their opposition's political position.

Can you explain the Trump administration's political aims this term? Because this sounds very much like both sides are the same, and I'm not seeing that at all with what Trump and Elon are trying to accomplish.

by goatlover

4/3/2025 at 3:46:26 PM

Adherence to tribal views is how you end up with the space shuttle Columbia crash.

by tschellenbach

4/3/2025 at 6:29:30 PM

Author says SF Bay Area is truth seeking, but that's far from truth.

More like, it's truth seeking within its echo chamber.

by nextworddev

4/2/2025 at 6:55:04 PM

The article is titled Why I don't discuss politics with friends but it doesn't explain the why? Unless I missed it. It seems to just talk about the challenges.

Why don't you discuss politics with friends? Are you worried about loss of friends? Do the conversations ruin your day? Do you feel alienated?

Depending on the why, there's different points I'd argue for or against the reasoning. Without that piece, it's kind of hard to discuss the premise of the article without just guessing its implications.

by jameslk

4/2/2025 at 7:13:14 PM

This sentence was intended as that answer, but I guess it wasn't clear enough:

"And this is fundamentally why I don't discuss politics with friends.

It's not that I don't want or am scared of opposing views (in fact the opposite is true[8]), but rather because of how common others’ desire to "remain in the bubble" is."

I actually am willing to risk alienation to find people that enjoy this sort of discussion-based discovery as much as I do, but found most people I encounter don't actually want that -- so I try and respect what seems to be the average opinion.

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 4:47:07 PM

We often reach for black and white thinking which makes political discussions difficult. Both sides do it, and it stunts our empathy for why people vote the way they do.

by dangjc

4/3/2025 at 5:01:10 PM

Empathy for why people vote the way they do has to be balanced with empathy for those harmed by horrible voting decisions.

by kerkeslager

4/3/2025 at 6:17:32 PM

There are horrible consequences and people are suffering, totally. So then what? How do we get others to understand the impacts and start to change their mind?

by dangjc

4/3/2025 at 11:48:26 AM

> Most people don't want to graduate from tribalism.

Even if you personally want to, others will still judge you based on it. And honestly, there's often enough people out there for you to pick a social circle that aligns with your own interests at least on fundamental issues.

As for the people that you don't choose to be around, e.g. at work, probably read the room first.

by KronisLV

4/3/2025 at 12:34:07 PM

I actively practice not discussing politics but intentionally being member of groups of different political affiliation.

I can only encourage everybody to do the same.

People usually know if you are a „filthy liberal“ or a „closet fascist“ anyways and my experience shows that just knowing you will draw them away from the political extremes.

by niemandhier

4/3/2025 at 11:46:04 AM

> Bay Area … finding a community of truth-seeking people

I don’t know if I would entirely classify the Bay Area as truth seeking people. It’s eclectic but it definitely felt just as polarizing as living in other parts of the country, but perhaps it’s better defined as moving to live with more like minded people.

by infecto

4/3/2025 at 1:40:45 PM

This is "both-sides-ism" of the worst sort. It's exactly the sort of navel-gazey pablum that gives technical people a bad name.

The author doesn't recognize that it's not "politics" today. Politics is disagreeing on how to fund road improvements. When one party wants to dismantle the state, remove protections for marginalized groups, disavow alliances, engage in absurd imperialism, and flagrantly disregard the rule of law, we're not talking about mere "politics" anymore.

This is "both-sides-ism" of the worst sort. And it gives one the impression that the author is fine being friends with people who hole absolutely horrible beliefs, as long as he doesn't have to know about them.

by ubermonkey

4/2/2025 at 6:35:32 PM

I strongly disagree with most of this post.

Politics dictates so much of daily life, at every level, that it's important to be able to have conversations about it. It's frankly self-righteous to see yourself as the one person with nuanced opinions in a crowd of simpletons, and while I do think that politics in many liberal democracies has become more polarized, you'll never restore nuanced debate or good-faith disagreement in political discussions by just avoiding the topic.

I'm not advocating for politics being the only thing you talk about with your friends, but if you and your friends are able to have useful discussions about the impact of some policies over others, can have constructive disagreements over reasonable political discourse, and can identify larger problematic trends in politics, a lot of good can come of that.

by _verandaguy

4/3/2025 at 2:57:15 PM

> Politics dictates so much of daily life, at every level,

That’s weird because you can live life of total ignorance of what’s happening in the news. Lobbying and marketing make you think things are important that aren’t.

by grandempire

4/3/2025 at 3:08:27 PM

> That’s weird because you can live life of total ignorance of what’s happening in the news.

Being unaware of politics, just like being unaware of biology or physics, doesn't reduce or disprove the degree to which it impacts your life, it just recuces your understanding.

by dragonwriter

4/3/2025 at 4:26:29 PM

Only if you believe PR and material published by NGOs is equivalent to political understanding.

It’s a nice thought. But it’s kind of like thinking you will become an athlete by watching ESPN talk shows. Or maybe even hoping to learn about physics by watching the Big Bang theory. You might pick up some new words, but It’s two levels removed from the real thing.

by grandempire

4/3/2025 at 3:37:36 PM

Of course, but I think people tend to overestimate the amount politics, especially federal politics actually impact their lives.

Spending hours a day worrying and reading about cancer risk and fatalities increases your understanding, but it certainly isn't healthy or proportional.

by s1artibartfast

4/3/2025 at 6:45:42 PM

You can drive a car blindfolded, too, in ignorance of the wall you're driving into; that doesn't mean it's a good idea.

A marginal understanding of what's happening in the world around you helps you navigate it better.

by _verandaguy

4/2/2025 at 6:52:02 PM

Ideally, one should select friends that are respectful of other's opinions. Certainly, one shouldn't keep someone close who isn't.

But with family and acquaintances, it's not worth getting into. Except when someone isn't being respectful. Then I will certainly speak up and ask why they aren't respecting someone's right to think for themselves.

by stretchwithme

4/2/2025 at 9:33:38 PM

I don't have a problem with my dad's view that taxes should be low or that we should be responsible with the environment. I don't have a problem with his view that over-regulation is a danger. I don't have a problem with my dad's opinion that capitalism is great, even with my disagreement.

I have a problem with the fact that my dad votes for people who do not do those things, and then gets upset when people point that out to him.

He told me that "I think people just need to have more patience with each other and accept our differences" as a moral to a story he told about being a manager to trans and non-binary folks. IMO it's 100% the right take, and he holds no negative feelings for any trans people or nonbinary people.

Then he votes for the anti-trans candidate.

How do you square that circle?

The reality is that I know my dad's voting history (we have talked about politics) and my dad is not an idealist or a pragmatist or conservative or liberal.

My dad is a populist.

by mrguyorama

4/3/2025 at 6:27:29 AM

> Then he votes for the anti-trans candidate.

> How do you square that circle?

I don't know your dad, maybe he doesn't see that candidate as "anti-trans"?

If you think that some group has unfair benefits you can vouch for stripping those benefits without seeing yourself as "anti". Your drive is not hatred but fairness. You can be misguided but that's a different question.

If you think church must pay taxes, it doesn't make you anti-church. If you want to reduce police funding it doesn't make you anti-police. If you want stricter control of guns that doesn't make you anti-guns.

The whole "anti" split is indeed a sing of the tribalism which in US takes a binary form. You're either with us or against us.

by alexey-salmin

4/3/2025 at 4:27:47 AM

Doesn't a lot of it come down to having to choose between only two parties?

It's unlikely that most people will agree with all the positions of a party, so they choose the one who most closely aligns with their highest priority issues.

Perhaps trans policy is just a lower priority issue for your dad. His voting may be illogical based on your priorities, but may be the rational choice based on his ranking of issues.

by djrj477dhsnv

4/3/2025 at 12:57:04 AM

I don't think I ever make the only-nuanced-opinion claim, the claim I'm making here is many people don't want to have useful discussions, they just want to proselytize

I actually say there are reasons to persevere and encourage debate if it's not just trying to "win":

"However, one reason to persevere is to find the 1% of people that also want to see the world as it is. Aka, finding your own community of anti-tribalists."

"Few things give me greater joy than a discovery-ridden conversation with smart friends, and this is only enhanced if I learn something I previously believed to be true is actually wrong. Seriously, come prove some core belief I have as wrong and you will quite literally make my week."

by shw1n

4/2/2025 at 6:59:11 PM

I lived in China in the early-2000s, and one of the things I noticed is that no one ever talked about any sort of politics. Never. It was weird at first, as political discussion is so ingrained in the culture (in the US). Even just regular smalltalk, like, "How's it going, Bob? / It'd be a lot better if the city council would pull their heads out of their asses and fix these potholes!" - there was nothing like that.

I asked a few local friends about it, and got two basic explanations:

1. What's the point? No one is empowered to change anything, so why bother talking about it at all?

2. You can get in big trouble for saying the wrong thing in public.

The weirder thing I noticed is that I kinda enjoyed it. It was nice to not hear a bunch of bitching about the government (not saying the government shouldn't be criticized - it should; just saying it was nice to be completely removed from it for a time).

Not sure if it's still like this in China; I haven't been there in years, but yeah, this was really strange to me when I lived there.

by jimt1234

4/2/2025 at 7:23:32 PM

I do think that a scary thing is that if there's a descent into fascism, how many people will hardly notice, or maybe even enjoy it. There was a quote I heard on this American life recently, that went:

"Life under autocracy can be terrifying, as it already is in the United States for immigrants and trans people. But those of us with experience can tell you that most of the time, for most people, it's not frightening. It is stultifying. It's boring. It feels like trying to see and breathe under water — because you are submerged in bad ideas, being discussed badly, being reflected in bad journalism and, eventually, in bad literature and bad movies."

by techpineapple

4/2/2025 at 7:27:42 PM

I have been in countries like that and I've found they were quite open to talking to me about it, since I was obviously a foreigner much less likely to snitch on them than even their family or friends. Buy a beer for someone in a dictatorial country and I pretty much guarantee you they will open up in private.

by ty6853

4/2/2025 at 6:46:43 PM

I actually ask my friends what they think and don't judge them for it. Everyone has some way to build up their belief and it's interesting to listen to these.

They often have horrible reasoning but I don't try to talk them out of it, just nod, polite comment, move on.

by kubb

4/3/2025 at 4:34:47 AM

A good discussion. I've personally thought of political adherence similar to football teams. Fans are fans. That's it.

Escaping that tribalism or fandom is important, but you need to hold fast to your own sense of morality along the way.

Applying your own sense of right/wrong to political arguments and policies is a useful way to cut through the noise and distraction that accompanies political discourse.

by rukuu001

4/3/2025 at 4:03:07 AM

I had quick scan of the comments but I didn't see anybody else make the point, so here is my 2c.

I believe the problem is the two party systems and how our government is set up, people vote for one tribe or the other. There is no _value_ to being educated on individual issues because ultimately you simply have to choose between 2 people who are affiliated with a party.

How awesome would it be if individuals could vote on specific issues, perhaps only after proving they have a working knowledge of the subject matter.

by jay_kyburz

4/3/2025 at 4:53:36 AM

Completely agree and it is an oversimplification when you graph people on even a 2-dimensional axis.

In reality we all have beliefs that are formed by our "in groups". People have groups beliefs formed from their religion, work, hobbies, study, and internet consumption. These all form our views and then get flattened to a 2-party system.

Unfortunately people can now form their identity solely on a political identity primarily due to social media.

by Crye

4/3/2025 at 6:21:47 AM

agreed, this would be ideal if maybe practically impossible

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 5:23:43 PM

im a nuance enjoyer when it comes to politics too but i wouldnt say i know adequate amounts about economics, politics, game theory, etc. i might know slightly more about my preferred fields than the average person, but im still woefully incompetent. so im always hesitant to lay judgement. especially because politics is such a complex system. its difficult to make the probabilities the author speaks of unless you make a bunch of assumptions. which is terrible and miserable. things get even worse when you think about things at a global vs local political level, which are just completely different in dynamics.

i hate rationalists because it's like. you cant logically reason your way out of this one buddy. the system is far too complex for rationalism to work. sometimes its easier to just align with the groupthink and focus on other things you deem more important. hanging out with friends vs spending all day in your room teaching yourself about tribal relations in central africa so you can have your own unique opinions on us foreign policy.

by nixonaddiction

4/3/2025 at 5:43:26 PM

I feel like "tribal relations in central Africa" is a defeatist exaggeration of the requisite nuance necessary to engage meaningfully with socioeconomic power dynamics in one's own society. It's an extremist viewpoint, and unworthy of a "nuance enjoyer."

Remember the Pareto Principle! The principal aspect of Central African Politics is probably, still, colonialism/imperialism and the game of Hungry, Hungry Hippos played between US/Russia/China.

Do you really need to grok the unique reactions to neo-colonialism in every affected African, South American, and Asian country to form a principled, independent outlook?

by rexpop

4/3/2025 at 4:25:22 AM

I think you're right, it is harder to discuss politics as widely as we once did.

That said, what do you think of money changing what is left/right and group/individual? The outcome of Citizens United to allow obscured spending to create seeming grass roots efforts on any topic that the monied want very effectively moving opinions.

by paul_h

4/3/2025 at 4:14:02 AM

Telling people they don't have political views, that they only belong to a tribe, is a great way to lose friends.

by cjohnson318

4/2/2025 at 6:41:41 PM

It’s super sad that the political establishment has managed to polarize people so much that a rational discussion about very important issues is not possible anymore for a lot of people. It’s a dream come true for unscrupulous politicians and oligarchs who can do whatever they want as long their propaganda is strong enough.

by rqtwteye

4/2/2025 at 8:38:57 PM

I think its a side-effect of depoliticization by neoliberal reform from the 80s onward in the western liberal democracies. Everything has already been privatized and financialized, technocratic decision making has taken over. People are increasingly hurt by this system, but there is no political conceptualization of where that hurt is coming from. So people are galvanized into impotent political camps where they can hysterically scream about gay people, abortion, immigrants, guns or whatever.

I would be very curious to know what people here even consider "rational debate", probably a bunch of centrist takes on gay people, abortion, immigrants, guns or whatever would be my guess.

by lyu07282

4/3/2025 at 10:12:56 AM

Most people are afraid of words, not a great start for discussion :p

And then there are forbidden words, words that make you lose your job, or your freedom...

by Nemrod67

4/3/2025 at 5:05:06 PM

Does the author really believe anyone can transcend tribalism?

by norir

4/3/2025 at 7:38:04 PM

No compromise with fascism!

by JackYoustra

4/3/2025 at 11:20:48 AM

Maybe tribalism is ok in some respects, and maybe we should increase it.

For example, it would be fine if the people in the other tribe to do what they want - as long as when the taxes becomes too high, the beaurocracy stifling, the crime rampant, and they have to deal with issues they assumed other people would sacrifice for in order for them to feel good - as long as when it inevitably breaks down, they don't come to MY area learning nothing and try to replicate what they left.

That is a worldwide problem actually.

by ghosttaboo

4/3/2025 at 9:13:05 AM

I'm looking forward to going back to the days when political disagreements were more along the lines of 'I think __TAX__ should be x%, rather than x+y%'

by techterrier

4/3/2025 at 3:39:18 AM

I'll never forget calling Yang a tool in a group of math nerds back around 2019. Instantly outgrouped. I don't think this alone caused our friendship to crumble, but the fact that we couldn't discuss actual policy makes me tend to agree with this post.

by nixpulvis

4/2/2025 at 6:41:39 PM

Welcome to the Bay Area!

The big issue is a lot of people will believe what they want to believe. Most folks are not scientists - they start by assuming their conclusions and will choose the soothing moral and emotional rhetoric over evidence.

Trying to see the world objectively puts you in a category of outliers. The people you become friends with due to proximity in everyday life will not be outliers.

by light_triad

4/2/2025 at 6:45:27 PM

Most people are unaware of how small that outlier group is.

Like there's an even bigger group of people who think they're scientific and unbiased and impartial but they actually aren't. That group is more likely the group you and I are in.

The group of actual objective people is so small that you may never meet a single person like this in your lifetime. That person may even be autistic.

by ninetyninenine

4/2/2025 at 7:01:26 PM

Part of being scientific is realising that you can't be completely unbiased and impartial, but you can be thorough, systematic, rigorous and informed by evidence rather than soundbites.

Some questions don't have definite answers, it's the sophistication of the analysis that counts.

by light_triad

4/2/2025 at 10:17:45 PM

nailed it (and ty for the welcome!)

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 4:16:36 PM

I'm not even sure what politics is anymore. I'm largely not on social media, so I am generally late to what's taboo or a hot button topic, like Tesla automobiles and SpaceX, or anything else connected to a billionaire.

In 2025, but before the Tesla burnings made the news, I was having some chitchat about possibly purchasing a Tesla as my next car, at which point, I got a tirade of anger mentioning words like "Nazi", "fascism" and so on. I was completely taken aback.

I realize we Americans are probably undergoing the results of some adversarial nation-state psychological operations[1], but we really need to chill out.

1. Coincidentally, most of my social media "usage" is identifying sock puppet accounts and their adversarial psyops campaigns.

by runjake

4/2/2025 at 6:55:06 PM

I feel pretty much the same, except the political situation here (central Europe) is pretty mild. I can't imagine being in the US right now.

by panstromek

4/3/2025 at 7:56:11 AM

For what it's worth, the situation in the US right now is largely fine. It's hard to appreciate what the reality on the ground is like if all one sees is the media (which stirs up trouble because that makes them money) or terminally online Doom posters (a lot of the commenters on any social media site). But for the average person, life is going on as normal. Some people like things the administration is doing and some dislike them, but most people don't feel the need to make it the central feature of their lives.

by bigstrat2003

4/2/2025 at 6:36:56 PM

In my experience the (now ancient) Sequences are not of much use in learning how to change your mind. With only a cursory background in psychology, his advice tends to consist of generic platitudes. Not much practical application.

I’d recommend a short course in mindfulness instead, at whatever point in the spectrum between science and mysticism you’re comfortable with.

by TimorousBestie

4/3/2025 at 4:08:14 AM

Is this an American thing? No one has ever in my life asked me "Who did you vote for?"

I have had plenty of people behave in a way that made it clear they assumed I agreed with them on political matters/issues that would have us voting the same way (sometimes correctly, sometimes incorrectly) but I have never been asked this question. Is it common or is it a contrivance in service of the article?

by JamisonM

4/3/2025 at 5:25:00 AM

My experience may not be representative, but I think it's very uncommon to outright ask "who did you vote for" in the US. It's more common (although many people still find it impolite or inappropriate in many situations) for someone to bring up an issue that is important to them and that strongly suggests a preference for one of our two viable political parties.

by tdeck

4/3/2025 at 5:34:49 AM

The only scenario where I believe people might directly ask "Who did you vote for?" is screening for dating. I don't know exactly how common it is, but I've heard multiple anecdotes about that being asked on dating apps or first dates, because they're not interested in dating someone who voted for Trump.

Prior to Trump it wasn't really a thing, because both parties were still following the law and maintaining a functioning democracy, so people could date across party lines and just agree-to-disagree about taxes or whatever.

by marcuskane2

4/3/2025 at 4:23:16 AM

> How can you prioritize limited resources with deadly consequences without understanding utilitarianism vs deontology (i.e. the trolly problem)?

Can you explain this to me?

by joeevans1000

4/3/2025 at 3:17:38 PM

Right. The only sort of person who could write something like this is a person who is not affected (or percieves themselves to not be affected) by "politics."

by jrm4

4/3/2025 at 1:18:36 PM

I don’t talk politics much when I’m first getting to know someone because our country is so polarized that they automatically assume you are one of two extreme groups. Most people’s political beliefs are similar to religious beliefs, they have them because their parents/community had those beliefs or they attend a certain church(MSNBC, Fox News, etc.) that consistently reinforces their beliefs instead of encouraging critical thought about their positions. This also leads to overly moralizing political affiliation, you’re “one of them” and “a bad person”, not a thinking person whose beliefs can be changed with facts/discussion.

I think the solution is tolerance. Whatever your politics are they don’t typically affect me personally. I have a few friends that are far further right than Ben Shapiro and a couple that are far more left than Bernie Sanders and want literal Communism. They range from extreme authoritarian to extreme libertarian or various flavors of anarchist. Some want to ban guns entirely and some want personal ownership of bazookas. Diversity! I often enjoy hearing their thoughts and we have all been able to change each others’ minds on a few issues. People’s minds do change, but it’s a slow process.

That said, politics is a burden to me in some relationships. It’s hard to have a calm rational discussion when my family member says “The muslims are walking across the Gulf of Mexico and setting up terror cells in Texas”. They actually believe we’re experiencing terrorist attacks and its just not being reported. I guess my limit for a comfortable discussion is some level of contact with reality.

by TexanFeller

4/2/2025 at 6:35:07 PM

In normal times this would be okay.

by segmondy

4/3/2025 at 8:19:00 PM

well played .. I mean posted

by mediumsmart

4/2/2025 at 6:47:13 PM

> 1. become truth-seeking

How does one even begin to do that? Looking at people I know who describe themselves as "truth-seeking", it seems that it is a one way ticket to Conspiracyland.

by ulnarkressty

4/2/2025 at 9:51:06 PM

I guess recognizing when you're desiring a certain outcome so much you put blinders on to contradicting evidence

my method is to constantly try and prove my beliefs wrong, via the "oscillating" I describe in the piece

by shw1n

4/2/2025 at 6:57:06 PM

Yeah, I sort of have a counter-belief that, generally speaking the way to have the most.... Grounded understanding of everything is to be a bit dispassionate about whether or not you have the truth. Being truth seeking has probably a 80/20 chance of going conspiracy nut vs actually being honestly truth seeking. Especially if you're not trained or the subject isn't in your wheel house.

by techpineapple

4/3/2025 at 10:15:11 AM

we may not be wired by default to include unknown unknowns in our decision making, even when we manage to include known unknowns :p

by Nemrod67

4/3/2025 at 12:58:41 AM

yeah this is a very real risk

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 4:46:10 PM

That's the biggest problem these days - people don't talk about much meaningful - but they do chat and spend ridiculous amounts of time on socials

by SebFender

4/2/2025 at 6:44:49 PM

I don't converse about politics at all, because conversation is not generally amenable to anything other than some vague virtue signaling in all but the very best of circumstances. For instance, a basic rule of conversation is that unless you have a very good reason, once a conversation wanders away from a topic, you don't drag it back to the same topic. That's great for idly chatting and catching up with friends, and it's a rule for a good reason, but it's quite far from what any sort of thought or an interaction that might actually change my mind on some topic requires.

While I don't disagree that people are quite tribal, I would observe that determining that people are tribal based on conversations can be a bit misleading, because the conversational form is extremely biased towards expressing things that will be indistinguishable from "tribalism", since all you have time to do is basically to put a marker down on the broadest possible summary of your position before the conversation baton must move on. That is, even a hypothetical Vulcan who has gathered all the data, pondered the question deeply, and come to the only logical conclusion, is going to sound tribal in a conversation, because that's all a conversation can convey.[1] Sufficient information conveyance to actually demonstrate the deep pondering and examination of all the evidence is ipso facto a lecture, or at best, a Socratic dialog or an interview, neither of which is a conversation in this sense.

For better and worse (and rather a lot of each), this medium we're working in right now at least affords itself to complete thoughts. It has its own well-known pathologies, like the interminable flame wars descending off to the right endlessly as two people won't let something go, and many others, but at least it's possible to discuss serious matters in a format similar to this, based on writing in text that can be as long as it needs to be without anyone needing to interrupt to maintain basic social niceties. There's a reason the serious intellectual discourse has been happening in books and articles for centuries if not millennia now.

Note how conversationally gauche it would be for me to monopolize a conversation long enough to simply read this post, and by the standards of intellectual discourse this is a rather simple point.

[1]: In fact, most people will read the Vulcan as exceedingly tribal, because no amount of reciting snap counterarguments against the Vulcan's position will cause him/her to so much as budge an inch or even concede that "perhaps reasonable people could think that" or any other such concession. The snap counteragument was encountered a long time ago, and analyzed in the light of all the other data, and they have long ago come to their conclusions on it. If they can be moved, it will take a lot more. This is difficult to distinguish from a maximized tribalist in any reasonable period of time in a conversation.

by jerf

4/3/2025 at 6:32:08 PM

I agree that conversation is generally not very productive as we often talk past each other.

I would recommend anyone that struggle to discuss divisive or controversial topics to learn and watch Street Epistemology [0], or Compassionate Epistemology [1]. It's comparable to a Socratic dialog.

The basic idea that I got out of it is to unwrap one, and only one, person's beliefs at the time, find their best reason for that belief and see if the reason holds if it was used to believe something else. Repeat with the next best if not. By hiding your opinion on a topic, it's a lot easier to explore someone else's as they shouldn't get defensive or combative.

There are a lot of videos of this kind of interview, my favorite channel: Cordial Curiosity[2].

[0] https://www.streetepistemology.com/ [1] https://compassionateepistemology.com/ [2] https://www.youtube.com/@CordialCuriosity

by jeremiem

4/3/2025 at 4:14:37 PM

I really resonated with this blog article, and ended up reaching out to Ashwin on LinkedIn to connect. This is probably the most concise and clear description I've read of the problem, and I think sometimes recognizing the problem and really understanding is the first step to turning things around.

Like Ashwin, I don't believe that this is "fixable", in so much that humanity as a whole has a tendency towards tribalism that's innate to being human, and this is part of what allowed societies and civilizations to form, as much as it carries the downsides of interrupting reasoning and creating the conditions for warfare. Rather, I try to seek out people who are able to reason and have discussions.

I definitely appreciated reading this, as it felt very relatable in a way that most things do not.

by tristor

4/3/2025 at 6:51:13 AM

for the author, only the centrists, his own group, can display independent thinking.

he assigns all virtues of the world to his group while others seems to be barely more than glorified barbarians.

this is, at best, laughable... and honestly quite reductive and insulting.

this seems to stem from the classic idea of "if everybody was informed and intelligent as i am we would all agree", which i thought had already been disproven long ago. people have different base assumptions. cultures are real things... individual differences matter too.

he also treats ideologies as unified things which is historically false, meanwhile his personal particular set of idea is not an ideology but something akin to objective truth (for which he explicitly argues) or something adjacent to it. any semi-consistent (if that) set of ideas instantly becomes an ideology as soon as you share that set to a group. there are myriads of ideologies that pop-up and die every day... the ones with staying power obviously have accumulated some following but they are rarely all compassing; we have a word for those, cults.

but first thing first, change country and you will get entirely different "centrists" with an entirely different set of ideas. there is no reason there would not be (in his own terms) "accidental" leftists and "accidental" right--ists???

in a locked 2 party system like what you get in the united states, stuff will probably have a tendency to degenerate though. things are way more fluid in countries where you have more democratic choice. there is a lot of fear in the american mix, that doesn't work well with free-thinking.

by lucyjojo

4/3/2025 at 7:12:13 AM

> for the author, only the centrists, his own group, can display independent thinking.

Yeah it’s this.

It’s always funny to watch a centrist invent centrism and then declare that they alone have achieved the apotheosis of correct perfect opinions that breaks the shackles of being in a group, when in reality they’ve just joined the single largest political cohort of folks — people that don’t feel strongly enough about anything to begin to ponder the bare minimum effort it takes to affect literally any change (talking to other people about politics)

It is the same thing as watching other people do things and then “inventing” sitting around and doing nothing. That’s not an invention! Babies are born doing nothing!

by jrflowers

4/3/2025 at 6:56:55 AM

Trying to imagine writing 3,000 words about how Paul Graham and I have ascended beyond tribes without realizing I’m just in a tribe with Paul Graham

by jrflowers

4/3/2025 at 7:02:47 AM

as I like to say, "I'm tribal against tribalists" :)

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 7:19:31 AM

> as I like to say, "I'm tribal against tribalists" :)

Buddy if you can sum up your entire political philosophy as disdain for outgroups I don’t think you’ve quite achieved the liberation from the karmic wheel of suffering that is partisan politics that you wrote so many words about

by jrflowers

4/3/2025 at 5:03:49 PM

it was a joke, didn't think I'd have to explain but the key difference is I'm open to being convinced this view is wrong

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 8:50:16 PM

You wrote three thousand words about how everyone that you know has wrong opinions and you have right nuanced opinions without actually sharing any of those right nuanced opinions. The sole topic of the essay is criticism of outgroups, it is the only thing that you wrote about

by jrflowers

4/2/2025 at 6:56:25 PM

The author gains a great insight into the social consequences of discussing politics with friends, but I think it might be part of something larger, a sort of intellectual signaling of meta-contrarianism.

At least in the countries where I live, debating politics is less about civic duty and being a citizen, and has become a substitute for sports; people prioritize their passions, and they are not concerned with getting the government to implement the policies it promised in the first place, but with defending a side.

In Germany, we see on state broadcasts every single day discussions about how the USA is bad, Elon Musk, Donald Trump, how some war in a distant place is bad, and so on; and nothing related to local politics.

If you invite someone to go to the municipal legislative service to talk with someone about why we still have underinvestment in kindergartens, even with record revenue, while other groups of society are capitalizing on social benefits, nobody will show up.

Getting in front of a keyboard and brigading online to talk about federal elections and/or officials of other countries is cool: it gives you the latest scandal of the day, you can congregate with people of your chamber, it provides audience for podcasts, and it generates talking points that sound intellectually tasty.

At least for me, the politics that matter most are local politics; and this is the craziest thing: it's the kind of politics where you can do something as an individual, you will have someone to hear you out, and with some effort, you can make a real and direct difference for your community.

by braza

4/3/2025 at 11:07:25 AM

Left/Right: First thing - add more axes. The most used standard example from politics or economics is liberalism/libertarism (not diving into the subtleties of definitions, their history, usage in different parts of the world, etc.). Look for more such axes, leave the political conceptual world behind.

After that, try Principal Component Analysis and look, what remains from these dimensions and the labels describing them. Think up names for the Eigenvectors / new axes. Investigate further. For example, look where people are concentrating in this high-dimensional space.

by mbeex

4/3/2025 at 3:47:24 AM

Additional point: Politics and Ideologies have long tail effects, which makes arguing over them often an exercise in futility. We're arguing over the next footstep in a race that's got infinity left to run.

Russia is/was a global powerhouse under (its version of) Communism.

The US reached (essentially) global domination under Capitalsm.

China is in line to be the next hegemony under an odd combination of Communism, Authoritarianism and (serving Western) Capitalism.

Little old Germany wasn't far from conquering the world under what began as some form of Socialism.

Any of the -isms can be argued against by mentioning -ism-subscribing regimes that have fallen. Where this falls down is that each regime has its own way of corrupting the ideals of the -ism to favour of those 'at the top' or 'with the power to decide'.

Trickle-down (voodoo, for Ferris Bueller fans) economics seems to raise its head regularly despite not having a great track record for an entire population. I think the reason is that its popular with the powerful, so its track record with the population at large is a feature not a bug.

Who is right? What does it mean to be right?

What are the Acceptance Critiera?

by BLKNSLVR

4/2/2025 at 7:36:13 PM

> 3. Most people don't want to graduate from tribes to views

I checked out of political conversations when I noticed I was teaching remedial civics over drinks and none of us were having fun. So I just sit back and watch people who just want to engage in reality tv style yelling confrontation.

by dogleash

4/3/2025 at 12:57:50 AM

I take this angle when I detect dogma now

by shw1n

4/2/2025 at 6:43:16 PM

The author has a huge blindspot: discussing politics with others where it's not a co-operative search for truth; instead it's an opportunity to let your friends explain themselves. Don't challenge them, ask them questions. Let them talk it out. Offer your own observations not as ways to change their minds but as an invitation to elaborate and explore.

You don't need to share your opinions in every conversation. You don't need to challenge another's beliefs that you disagree with or think are factually wrong. You can bond over listening to them. And they can invite you to share your thinking non-judgementally.

by fatbird

4/2/2025 at 7:03:00 PM

This is actually how most of my conversations operate, I rarely share my beliefs in conversation, but ask questions -- often geared towards a tribal view I've detected

by shw1n

4/2/2025 at 6:41:02 PM

I do worry about seeing more of these posts, as a way of SV people - who bare a substantial burden of guilt for enabling the collective mess we’re in because the ad-tech/algorithm dollars were nice - collectively distancing themselves from facing said guilt.

No idea is this particular person is especially part of the problem, I’m just talking about general vibes.

by ballooney

4/2/2025 at 6:37:09 PM

I don't discuss friends with politicians either

by canadiantim

4/2/2025 at 6:40:16 PM

this guy gets it

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 6:33:44 PM

The writer does not discuss politics with their friends because they do not respect them

by worik

4/3/2025 at 6:32:14 PM

> A reader might fairly ask what my tribe is. I'm not sure.

Oh brother. Self-awareness about your political conditioning and biases should be step 1.

Being unaware of your (intellectual) tribe implies a lack of good-faith understanding about other tribes.

"What's water?" says the young fish.

by pphysch

4/3/2025 at 6:13:06 PM

A tribe is a collective brain. That work when people put truth first (Christianity) As the root of our culture fade out, we tilt toward satanism instead (serving self) Thus the tribes and institutions can no longer be trusted, everything fall appart, everyone lie all the time to serve the current advantages.

I would say discard people and institutions that lie to you, shame them. We don't have the time and brain power to find the truth in every decision.

by alfor

4/2/2025 at 6:24:57 PM

It looks like unintentional moderate and intentional moderate on chart switched, unless I'm misunderstanding?

by erehweb

4/2/2025 at 6:26:35 PM

hey thanks for reading! I believe that's right

intentional moderate = they're trying to straddle the middle, meaning they adjust views based on political swings

unintentional moderate = they accidentally end up in the middle from the average of their views, for which some may be extreme left or right

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 2:13:59 PM

Oh man yeah, you're vibing and all of a sudden "you like who?!!!"

by ge96

4/3/2025 at 5:52:56 PM

I was predicting within the first 500 words that the author was someone who symphatized with Rationalism. But how could this be? How could someone’s approach to rationality, so-called, be so correlated with their approach to politics?[1] Couldn’t people of many different backgrounds come to the same conclusion and my guess just have a small chance of being right?[2] Is it because of tribalism? No. The philosophy leads to a cluster of opinions. Just following its internal logic.

Apply that to other people and you’ll see how the article might be wrong.

[1] It’s not just the approach. There are a dozen things that are stated axiomatically which are not.

[2] Okay, okay. Being this website there is a SC bias already.

by keybored

4/3/2025 at 12:07:56 PM

Wow, great article.

I’ve lost respect for so many people because they couldn’t temper their political views. I wish more articles of this kind were published.

by RickJWagner

4/3/2025 at 4:18:56 PM

(US Centric opinion comment) in the wake of moving away from religions to more secular societies, it's shocking how much folks have simply switched from religions like Christianity et. al. to Republican or Democrat or Left or Right etc.

What I'd consider healthy exploratory debate is now treated like heresy punishable by metaphorical death.(eg cancellation)

That's why I often stay my tongue and let people believe I'm on their side. Frankly it's not worth the consequences and I'll let them live in their delusions because giving feedback is too dangerous nowadays.

by maerF0x0

4/3/2025 at 4:22:00 PM

This is the only sane way to operate nowadays.

by TechDebtDevin

4/2/2025 at 6:52:36 PM

is "becoming truth seeking" not some sort of religion - like the sports team - and the bay area is your tribe? Perhaps you were already suggesting this in your article and I've missed this - if so I apologise.

you seem to suggest that truth-seeking > tribalism, and we should pity the poor fools who are about tribalism. In this way, you're being tribalist against tribalism, no?

If ignorant tribalism brings people community and happiness, isn't that just as valid and commendable as truth-seeking?

Truth-seeking might provide a level of understanding of the world which is of value to your operating in life. It is not necessarily a sublime good of it's own right. Too much of it will alienate you from your mates.

I'd wager types like you might find on HN, Bay Area, could do with a little less seeking, in fact.

The Underground Man comes to mind, and presents the extreme of this spectrum. But then maybe he'd find mates in an area filled with other Underground Men?

by dcrimp

4/2/2025 at 6:55:49 PM

haha yes I was wondering if someone would pick up on this, totally agree

I absolutely joke I am "tribal against tribalists", which to me is sorta like someone implying their greatest fear is fear itself.

I do mention it is a totally fair belief to have in that piece, and respect conscious decisions to value that like I respect people's decisions to follow more traditional religions, but only have issue when it's passed off as a truth-seeking value

Have not heard of the Underground Man, will check it out -- thanks for reading btw!

by shw1n

4/2/2025 at 9:03:12 PM

If you reduce politics to 'what politians do', sure, I avoid it too.

Even when I know that outside of the US, most of us have the same opinions on what the trump admin is doing (especially in the pen and paper RPG community, where not being transphobic is basically a requirement), I still hate comments and discussions about it, probably for the same reason than the author does.

I disagree with his axis though, I've read a lot, and I mean _a lot_ of books and the more I read, the more left I went. And I started almost tea-party libertarian, then liberal-libertarian (because logic, and my class) then I understood power and class and became original libertarian (think Emma Goldman).

But politics are much more than that, it's how society organize, and if you can't talk to everybody about your city evicting the parasites who mismanaged and eventually brought down the waterlines because you're afraid of 'groupthink', you are fucked.

by orwin

4/3/2025 at 1:08:45 AM

Yeah I fully accept that there could be valid dots in the top left (or even top right) corners, just didn't include them to keep the chart's point simple and b/c it was also based on Paul Graham's article which made the same point

> But politics are much more than that, it's how society organize, and if you can't talk to everybody about your city evicting the parasites who mismanaged and eventually brought down the waterlines because you're afraid of 'groupthink', you are fucked.

Yeah I guess I differentiate between the individuals who could help you determine the truth of the mismanaging parasites vs the ones that just blindly support or hate them.

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 9:31:09 AM

I do think you have as much top dots on the left, right and middle. Because the radical center peg themselves as 'reasonable', doesn't mean they don't have an ideology they follow blindly. TINA, the 'third way' and all this stuff is groupthink too.

Just observing the epidermic reactions to MMT, the strawmaning, and all the Schopenhauer playbook thrown at a new, Occam's razor compatible economic explanation of how money works is probably what made me doubt this 'reasonable' stance, and I'm now convinced that once you've been persuaded that _you_ and your group are the 'reasonable', you're in fact so entrenched in your beliefs you'll dismiss anything that shake your worldview as unreasonable and strawman it (the lessWrong community is the perfect, small-scale example).

The only dots you should find on top, outside of groupthink are the one who read, and wrote new concepts.

> Yeah I guess I differentiate between the individuals who could help you determine the truth of the mismanaging parasites vs the ones that just blindly support or hate them

The justice system found them guilty and they got fined, but if no one acted, they would have sold their water rights to a company with suspiciously the same executives and owners during bankruptcy. Political movement made the municipality sweep in during bankruptcy, claim the water rights as part of repayment, and now administer the water lines and cleaning stations (and the watchdog are happy with cleaner water, and we locals are happy with cheaper water).

When everybody ignore politics, you'll have the West Virginian 'Freedom Industry' turn into 'Lexycon LLC', and nobody will say anything, because 'it's political'.

by orwin

4/3/2025 at 7:55:56 AM

Sharing my views here because they don't seem to be reflected in the comments yet.

I agree that politics are overwhelmingly tribal and resemble religion a lot (the "you believe in god, right?" analogy hits home).

I also used to be strictly anti-religious because religions tell lies and are anti-intellectual. I was against tribalism and in favor of rigorous debates on every topic.

I gradually changed my views though, and this happened not because I started to deny science but rather because I tried to apply it to deeper levels of reasoning. Basically I stopped seeing systems of beliefs (be it politics or religions) as independent entities of their own but rather as derivatives of the [ever changing] environment.

I now think that stable systems of beliefs exist not because they are true or false, or good or evil, but because in the past they helped their bearers to survive. The ones that failed at that task ceased to exist themselves because beliefs can't live outside of people's heads. That's the ultimate and objective test, provided by the nature itself. I don't think you can get more scientific in your ranking of beliefs.

Based on this I came to respect both Christianity and Islam because they did such a good job at that. I still dislike Islam though: it's against my tribe, but more on that below. My point here is that you can respect your adversaires and recognize they are good at something. E.g even now Islam is better at maintaining its numbers than some other cultures.

Within this framework tribalism is not bad but likely necessary. I think that the approach of "we are the good tribe, we see ourselves as different from other tribes, we want our tribe to survive, if necessary by exterminating other tribes" results in more stable societies than "we are rigorous intellectuals who can't agree on anything". It's beneficial for everyone to have a rigorous faction within the society but I doubt that this faction can survive on their own.

And besides, expecting the majority of population to debate everything is just unrealistic. It takes a lot of time and energy and I feel that most of people would rather spend that energy at work and with their families. Kind of like of people just "side" with the Apple or Android tribes, instead of building their own OS from sources. You see the phone as an utility, not as a goal. You just pick the one that works well for others, along with its benefits and inevitably with its flaws too. The grave consequences of picking a bad system of beliefs (and more importantly not changing it when the environment changes) are of course much different from that of a phone, but you can still describe both within the same framework, just very far away on the same scale.

by alexey-salmin

4/3/2025 at 10:10:10 AM

Agreed, cognition and philosophy are technologies, tools. They shape what we can extract from them.

Thus the problem is not political but philosophical, how would we decide what to do when we cant decide what is worth more. We are stuck in a local maximum, with Reality as the fitness function :p

by Nemrod67

4/3/2025 at 12:04:08 PM

I think humanity as a whole (not individual tribes) is quite good at getting out of local maxima in the past 2000 years.

Stable socioeconomic systems that in isolation could've existed for millennia are constantly getting crushed by their slightly more effective neighbors. When they're not crushed from the outside, they get consumed from within. In the end the better economy wins most of the time.

by alexey-salmin

4/3/2025 at 7:38:15 AM

I discuss politics with my communist friend, as an anarcho-capitalist. It never leads to a fight.

I think curiosity and a desire to learn goes a long way.

by johnisgood

4/3/2025 at 3:10:19 PM

Because you gonna lose them if you don’t agree

by m3kw9

4/3/2025 at 3:08:52 PM

> Often when someone asks "who did you vote for", what they're actually doing is verifying your adherence to group culture,

They are just checking to which group you belong, not verifying your adherence? It does not seem like a question you ask someone whose you know politics already.

But yes still is a problem

by throwaway290

4/3/2025 at 6:31:19 AM

It’s such a cultural thing. My friend group contains people from all sides of the political spectrum and they bicker like crazy when we go out but they are still friends. It might be a Spanish culture thing though.

by christkv

4/2/2025 at 7:43:50 PM

There is some good stuff here, but I generally disagree.

The difference for me is, I don't like everybody, and not everybody has to like me. That's okay, and it's not about disrespect, it's just that I like to surround myself with people who are thoughtful before they are opinionated.

If you know me, and you respect me, and I say something you think is crazy... if they first think you think is "Wait, I thought I respected him, but he's a bad person" instead of "Wait, I respect this person and they're saying something I disagree with. Am I wrong about that?", then, guess what, I'm not actually interested in having a deep relationship.

I studied philosophy in college and grad school. I had to "relearn" how to interact with people outside of the university setting for many of the reasons in this essay. However, upon reading the horrifying "how to win friends and influence people" way of interacting with normal people through flattery and shallow interaction, I thought fuck it, I just don't actually want to be close with people I can't have a real conversation with.

Not everyone gets to the right position right away, that's okay. I'm a strong small-"L" liberal, and I have friends that are conservatives, socialists, and even the occasional anarchist. The difference is that we're all still trying to figure it all out. We're not all pretending that "well if those people didn't exist then we'd have utopia already" because, well, all these system exist all over the earth and it ain't a utopia anywhere. We'll make our points, we'll needle each other in a friendly way, and we'll all say "fuck it, we're doing our best."

That doesn't mean I'm friendly with everyone (remember, I don't like everyone, and not everyone likes me), because there are plenty of political positions that pretty much require people to be unthoughtful. The views need to be consistent, and pretty much anything that end advocating substantial discrimination against certain people over other people isn't going to be internally consistent. Axioms are arbitrary, reason is not.

by scoofy

4/2/2025 at 8:28:06 PM

> "However, upon reading the horrifying 'how to win friends and influence people' way of interacting with normal people through flattery and shallow interaction"

Say what now? The book is littered with passages urging the reader to be sincere in interactions.

by ThrowawayR2

4/2/2025 at 9:09:45 PM

The book has you meta-analyze every aspect of your conversation. You're basically treating everyone with kid gloves all the time. Never tell someone they're wrong, go out of your way to praise people, treat everyone like the noble protagonist in their own story.

All of this is fine and dandy, and incredibly practical in practice, but it presupposes that you're talking to someone whose thinking processes are in opposition to any analytical thinking or self-critique.

I'm not saying the book isn't useful, my point is that the type of people for whom the book is effective are not the type of people I want to be close friends with.

To put it another way, my friend's parents are classic NIMBYs. If I want to hold their hand, and walk them to a place where they can see that their actions are harming the next generation, then, yes, Dale Carnegie's prescriptions are very effective. My point is I don't actually want to be close friends with anyone who needs their hand held just to see things from a different person's perspective.

I try to be kind, I try to be honest, I try to be upfront about who I am and what I stand for. I have made lots of close friends just by being willing to be patient with people who have different views from my own, without actually having to pretend I don't have any views at all. My friends are mature enough to understand that we are both smart people, and if I say something that puts them off, then we ought to be able to discuss it and learn from each other.

by scoofy

4/2/2025 at 9:40:18 PM

> "You're basically treating everyone with kid gloves all the time. Never tell someone they're wrong, go out of your way to praise people, treat everyone like the noble protagonist in their own story."

The book says that a person can deliver criticism and disagreement in ways that don't make the recipient defensive and that people respond positively when their accomplishments are recognized in a sincere and meaningful way. As for the last, that's simply the way most, if not all, people are; it's a failing that's almost universal.

It's about learning to be a person that is thoughtful to others and considerate of the foibles of humanity. I suppose a person could use it as a template for faking empathy and generally being manipulative but that's very much not what it suggests.

by ThrowawayR2

4/2/2025 at 10:13:47 PM

I mean, I'm not going to change your mind. I don't want to. I've read the book. I found it very helpful in a practical sense, while at the same time as finding it horrifying.

>that's simply the way most, if not all, people are; it's a failing that's almost universal.

Again, I don't disagree with you that this is a problem for the median person. My point is that, for the most part, I'm not really interested in being close friends with the median person. Friends in a sense? Sure. Chat at a bar? Sure. But not people I really talking about interesting things with. The median person isn't going to mesh very well with my personality.

The ivory tower was an isolated tower for a reason. Intellectuals were literally under threat of execution for the vast majority of human history. The underlying currents for that are basically reflected in the assumptions that Carnegie makes.

I want intellectual friends. I want be shown that I'm wrong. I learn something when I'm wrong. I understand that's not a common trait, but it's how I am, and how I want to be.

by scoofy

4/2/2025 at 9:47:11 PM

I'm not sure where I see we disagree?

I actually agree with everything you said, mostly just want people whose views are actually tribal and not open to discussion to acknowledge them as such, via:

"If someone is self-aware enough to consciously acknowledge their choice to remain in the bubble, that’s totally fair. I respect it like I’d respect anyone who chooses to participate in a more traditional religion. My issue is when this view is falsely passed off as an intellectually-driven one."

unless you're saying I shouldn't bother being polite and avoiding the convo at times, which I guess I disagree there

by shw1n

4/2/2025 at 10:25:52 PM

My point mostly that you're probably not actually close friends with people you can't discuss politics with. And if you are, then you are interested in different types of friendships than I am.

by scoofy

4/3/2025 at 1:13:39 PM

In my circle of family and friends, no one strays too far from the center, so I don't find it particularly difficult to navigate disagreement. We've gotten more carried away arguing about completely banal happenings. However, I sense not everyone else feels the same way.

What tends to happen at dinners or whatever is that some outspoken person (socially conservative on a pet issue) monopolizes conversation, and a couple of others keep mum because they don't like confrontation/arguing. The others don't care.

I am guilty of this in one particular case. I have a friend who describes himself as a classical Liberal, and when the subject comes up about pit bulls or the like, will say that "the problem is with the owners not the breed". What am I going to do, take out my crap phone and try to use data like a blunt instrument? I don't care enough to start an argument over it.

by lanfeust6

4/3/2025 at 12:46:03 PM

The article misses one pretty huge thing: up until maybe 10-15 years ago, politics was - mostly - differences around theories of economy, where both sides had valuable arguments for and against them. Out of that, you could cut compromises and work bi-partisan.

Now? It's by far not among differences in economic policies any more. The differences are much more fundamental: the rights of LGBT people to exist, the rights of women to have a life outside of breeding children, minorities having the same rights as the majority. The questions that form the divide are binary in nature, not a spectrum any more. When differences become existential in nature, reconciliation is impossible - either you grant the universal freedoms to everyone or you do not.

by mschuster91

4/3/2025 at 4:59:58 AM

The first step “become truth-seeking”, is problematic because the truth that can be found is often just opinion or propaganda, disguised as truth.

Many a conspiracy believer will tell you they already have the truth (unlike unenlightened you).

Better is to remain inquiring and skeptical in forming conclusions or beliefs.

by aryehof

4/3/2025 at 5:42:40 AM

> It's not that the average person is any less tribal up there, but because Silicon Valley contains such a high concentration of people testing ideas in the world, it selects for people that must regularly re-evaluate their biases or fail.

Is this true?

by neilv

4/3/2025 at 6:23:08 AM

based on my travels to many parts of the world, yes. being mis-aligned with reality has very real, negative, consequences when building companies, and therefore people here are forced to be more truth-seeking.

(not all ofc - i would say this forcing function applies to < 1% of the population in SFBay, but that is still a far greater concentration than anywhere else i've seen).

i find similar truth-seeking-ness in long-term investors. cultures that are more short-term oriented, and who have less feedback from the market, seem to deviate away from truth-seeking because the forcing function becomes weak: you aren't quickly penalized for being wrong.

by koopuluri

4/3/2025 at 9:32:53 AM

I couldn't fathom not discussing politics with friends. Political life is an integral part of modern... well, life. And to the contrary, if there ever existed people you might have good faith conversations with, it should be your friends and family. If not, can you really call them so?

by thrance

4/3/2025 at 9:19:25 AM

I often talk politics with friends, mostly because we all like to moan about the state of things.

Maybe this doesn't translate to the US, but in the UK (and the largely British friend-group I have here in Australia) in my bubble we don't tend to strongly identify with any political party or politician, rather we tend to look down at the self-serving and/or myopic weirdos in parliament and decry their short-sighted, uninformed policy-making whichever side they're on. And I'm not trying to claim some great enlightened intellectual position for myself here - I think it's probably more common than not.

by Nursie

4/3/2025 at 11:06:26 AM

The "all as bad as each other" approach. That itself is a political view, a rather dangerous one as it's open to be easily manipulated.

by ta1243

4/3/2025 at 4:22:55 PM

That certainly isn’t a claim or a point in my post.

There are better and worse politicians and parties, certainly, and your vote and who gets power does matter. They certainly aren’t all as bad as each other but neither are any of them heroes or gods, and identifying strongly with a particular party is weird.

by Nursie

4/3/2025 at 9:05:28 AM

Like the author, I tend towards being a function that returns the opposite of what the other person believes, rather than having a fixed political opinion. Mostly I lack the confidence to claim that this way or that way is the Right Way To Do Things -- and I'm fascinated (and envious, and also appalled) by those who do.

But on this I differ:

>Seriously, come prove some core belief I have as wrong and you will quite literally make my week.

I don't think I believe this at all. It's certainly not true of myself -- I aspire to it, but my ego is much too fragile. I have spent much time and effort carefully checking the small set of core principles that I do feel justified in calling "correct", and the reason for that is precisely to avoid the unpleasant surprise of discovering that they are demonstrably wrong after all.

by akoboldfrying

4/2/2025 at 6:29:43 PM

If you can’t talk about politics with your friends, then they are not your friends.

by FollowingTheDao

4/2/2025 at 6:33:58 PM

I get the sentiment but guess I disagree, esp in the modern age with the increased polarization painting opposing sides as evil daily

by shw1n

4/2/2025 at 6:53:45 PM

Tacking onto this I think the more important variable for ease of conversation is the extent to which someone's sense of identity is tied to their political beliefs.

E.g. I'm moderately left but I'll still engage in healthy conversation with right-leaning friends and acquaintances because I like to understand where they're coming from. However I have some friends who I love dearly but know that despite their intelligence and how much I enjoy their company, they've become very tribal in their politics, so I don't bother engaging in political discussions with them beyond basic diplomatic contributions. Or posing questions that offer new perspectives. I still trust them and value their friendship though.

by setsewerd

4/2/2025 at 7:28:09 PM

But this is the difference between friends and acquaintances. My friends are more likely to share my views, but even if they didn’t talking about this stuff would not damage the friendship since it’s beyond ideology and more about shared sacrifice and loyalty.

by FollowingTheDao

4/2/2025 at 6:49:22 PM

Isn't that increased polarization largely driven by, you know, certain political actions? I find it strange to argue that both sides are evil nowadays. I'd say one is evil and the other is hypocritical and self-serving. The choice is still pretty clear.

by curiousgal

4/2/2025 at 7:00:49 PM

Was going to comment the same thing. I try to avoid politics with co-workers and family because they are people that you are obligated, on some level, to interact with and have decent social cohesion. Friendships are entirely voluntary, so I can't begin to understand choosing to spend time with people that you can't honestly share your thoughts and feelings with, political or otherwise.

by mightyham

4/2/2025 at 6:56:19 PM

Who among us does not entertain the happy illusion that our genuine friends number more than is the reality?

by everybodyknows

4/2/2025 at 7:27:29 PM

Precisely. I make a clear distinction between my friends and my acquaintances. My friends would do anything for me, my acquaintances, not so much.

by FollowingTheDao

4/3/2025 at 8:48:24 AM

I always try to stay informed, rationalize well and always try to find arguments for both sides of a theory. I act like a detective in search of the truth or a mathematician confronted with a new conjecture or theory. I try to dig until I can see whether the theory has solid chances to be true or not. I try to make the process as fast as possible, because I don't like to procrastinate or lose time. Most of the time is fine if I know something has 60% chances of being true and I don't need 99.99% because I can back off and review the theory if I am wrong.

That being said, I don't pick a party solely on what I believe is the truth. I also try to see whether my interests align well with that party.

As for discussing politics with friends, most of my experience is the same as the author's. I started having a dislike for very long lawyer-like discussions and arguments that lead nowhere. I kind of detect fast if my discussion partner is seeking the truth, he is proceeding with an archeology or detective like mindset and proceed accordingly.

by DeathArrow

4/3/2025 at 7:26:08 AM

I find this to be painfully true in the US. Most of the rational discussions I have about politics are with friends from other countries (Soviet Russia, China, Africa, etc).

by slowhadoken

4/3/2025 at 7:19:10 AM

I don't think you can separate the mechanics from the content. Usually people feeling pushback against their political ideas don't realize they are dumb ideas even if they are complex.

by th0ma5

4/3/2025 at 5:46:59 AM

To be honest, I enjoy discussing politics with my friends. They’re all pretty good at discussing it. We have lots of common interests otherwise so it’s easy to just step away and talk about other things in the group Slack instead.

by renewiltord

4/3/2025 at 4:19:47 PM

What percentage of the comments here fall exactly in line with the tribal groupthink the article was about? 90% 95% 98%?

by lazyeye

4/3/2025 at 3:51:08 PM

The author believes he is better than his friends and probably irritates friends when talking politics but can rationalize his way out of the problem while still blaming his friends.

What a jerk.

by drewcoo

4/3/2025 at 2:12:01 PM

From TFA:

> Being informed is tough. To have an informed view on any given issue, one needs to:

> Understand economics, game theory, philosophy, sales, business, military strategy, geopolitics, sociology, history, and more.

> Be able to understand and empathize with the various (and often opposing) groups involved in a topic.

> Detect and ignore their own bias.

> How can you prioritize limited resources with deadly consequences without understanding utilitarianism vs deontology (i.e. the trolley problem)?

> Understand China-US relations without understanding communism vs capitalism, the fear of tyranny vs the threat of invasion, or how and where computer chips are made? [etc.]

From Harry Frankfurt's "On Bullshit" (1986):

> Bullshit is unavoidable whenever circumstances require someone to talk without knowing what he is talking about. [...] People are frequently impelled — whether by their own propensities or by the demands of others — to speak extensively about matters of which they are to some degree ignorant. Closely related instances arise from the widespread conviction that it is the responsibility of a citizen in a democracy to have opinions about everything, or at least everything that pertains to the conduct of his country’s affairs. The lack of any significant connection between a person’s opinions and his apprehension of reality will be even more severe, needless to say, for someone who believes it his responsibility, as a conscientious moral agent, to evaluate events and conditions in all parts of the world.

TFA implicitly assumes that the only options are "belong to a political tribe where someone else is responsible for justifying your actions" or "become a perfect estimator and Effectively Altruistic so you can truthfully justify your actions" (the latter, coincidentally, indistinguishable to an outside observer from your joining the Gray Tribe). But surely he's omitting to discuss (and perhaps edging toward an example of) the Frankfurt option: "justify your own actions by coming up with some bullshit."

by quuxplusone

4/3/2025 at 3:00:24 AM

I do my best to avoid talking and or thinking too much about politics. If I do i then realize family members to friends have sold their mind, intelligence, ability to clearly point out right from wrong, etc to political emotional babble from either side.

by paul7986

4/3/2025 at 9:23:15 AM

I completely disagree with this. A friend is someone who I can disagree politically with and still be friends with. I extend the tribe to political views that aren't too extreme (fascists, extreme populists, violent revolutionary socialists, islamists...), so 90% of the people I can probably be friends with or have family relations with. And it has happened probably about 1-2 times in my lifetime that I even e.g. un-friended someone on social media because of views that I wouldn't tolerate because they fell outside the "normal politics tribe".

And again, that's because I'm lucky enough to not live in the US. I'd unfriend a red hat on FB in a heartbeat. I'd probably break connections with a family member over it too. I'd have problems even having a professional relationship with my US colleagues if I had found out they had a red hat in a social media post. But I don't see the problem with this at all tbh.

by alkonaut

4/2/2025 at 8:22:06 PM

A good friend of mine confessed that he doesn't argue to change other people's mind, he does it to change his own.

by readthenotes1

4/3/2025 at 7:21:30 AM

I noticed this with one of my friend, and have tried to inculcate this mode of thinking and behaviour - he really listens and asks insightful question instead of talking about his political views. It just stuck me one day that I was the talking, and I had no real idea of his political views because he was so agreeable.

by thisislife2

4/2/2025 at 9:47:49 PM

smart friend

by shw1n

4/2/2025 at 6:58:27 PM

Everything is political, so have a nice time discussing the weather with your friends.

by fabiofzero

4/3/2025 at 5:27:56 AM

I can talk for hours of non-political things. And I’m not talking about sports or similar things.

by sMarsIntruder

4/2/2025 at 7:47:43 PM

Ugh... I can't stand cloudy weather! A "nice day" means no clouds! I just can't be around people who think clouds are nice. If they like that weather so much, why don't they move somewhere where it's cloudy all the time! /s

by scoofy

4/2/2025 at 6:56:13 PM

If your friends are the sort that stick to tribes instead of thinking independently get smarter friends.

by Nimitz14

4/2/2025 at 9:52:06 PM

this is me trying haha

by shw1n

4/2/2025 at 6:46:25 PM

This is a good stance, but with a caveat.

I do have friends who are able to have nuanced views about politics/economics/AI, and generally high-level vague things that concern the entire human civilization.

But I also have friends that can't have those nuanced views, and when you try to engage in good faith discussion with them, they resort to tribalism and are not interested in finding nuance through reasoning.

With those I don't have any discussions about it.

If you are a friend - try to be someone from the first category. Don't engage in tribalism with your friends if you value them (unless your whole group is a bunch of bullies, in which case do whatever).

by antisthenes

4/2/2025 at 7:00:08 PM

^ agreed

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 8:11:51 AM

This article is this xkcd in article form:

https://xkcd.com/610/

When you say people are "tribal," while as a fact perhaps has some truth, you're essentially saying you don't believe in democracy--which is a common sentiment these days. It ironically is a thought terminating cliche evidentiary of a bias; it necessarily implies you can ignore people's political instincts and impulses which requires a particular disposition (bias) towards others around you.

I know what social scientists say about tribalism but interpretation of those kinds of research is not meant for individuals you know personally. Individuals are not distributions, they're people. That is, they have agency, with a right to their own opinions that ought to be engaged with seriously and sincerely. Some people may not think too deeply and just hone to a particular opinion just by fiat. In my life, that really isn't anywhere near "most" people I come in contact with or talk to as the article puts it. Most people in my life just don't think too deeply about these things, that's it. It's a lot less mundane than "people are sheeple" and more like "people don't care" or at least "people only really care about X" where X might be something like their own job or life.

by noobermin

4/3/2025 at 5:34:20 PM

Right wingers love inventing new ways to say the same tired bs. Tbf I stopped reading somewhere between “wither the struggling landlord” and “demonstrating consistency in your worldview makes you a sheep” but did I really need to see any more?

by smoothbenny

4/2/2025 at 6:48:10 PM

I have to tell you and most people reading this is that you belong to a tribe of people who only think they are impartial and unbiased and reasoned thinkers, but they actually aren't.

The level of objectivity that we strive for is just really possible.

by ninetyninenine

4/2/2025 at 9:48:44 PM

agreed, but if the seed of doubt can be planted at all then I consider this essay successful

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 3:00:09 AM

Discussing politics with friends and relatives is what makes you a moderate overall.

Otherwise you will grow up inside an echo chamber, far away from reality.

People talking about politics IRL makes you understand and reason other points of views. If you can't tolerate others views, then you are clearly a radical.

by waltercool

4/3/2025 at 5:54:17 AM

Oh, the irony of saying "Understand China-US relations without understanding communism vs capitalism", which clearly betrays how little they understand historical Marxist communism, and how far away modern China is from it (not to mention how far it's moved since Maoism).

Not to mention there's a ton of work in psychology already covering much of what the author writes about.

The author sounds like a pseudo-intellectual who thinks they can logic their way to human understanding through first principles, instead of doing any real work to understand the literature. Sadly, this is real common on HN.

by KingMob

4/3/2025 at 9:23:51 AM

[flagged]

by techright75

4/2/2025 at 6:40:55 PM

I disagree strongly with this. This is how we get into the state of political divisiveness that we are currently in. Discussing politics has always been a verboten topic with many families and friends, and now we are here where we think not talking about it is healthy.

Not discussing politics with friends is really indicative of the friendships you have. This is really an article about someone who has failed to discuss politics with "friends." As someone who routinely talks politics with friends (and we do NOT all agree with each other), it's a healthy experience. One where you can get a better understanding of people and their beliefs.

Stay in your bubble. But let's not pretend it's healthy or good.

by jasonlotito

4/3/2025 at 12:28:52 AM

Not sure if you read the article, because it's quite plainly stated that my reason for writing it is precisely because I have discussed it with many friends (and continue to do so)

Unless I encounter a signal that someone wants to remain in their bubble

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 2:54:27 AM

"Why I don't discuss politics with friends" implies that you don't discuss politics with friends. What you're saying here sounds quite different. It sounds like "I do discuss politics with friends, except when I encounter a signal that [etc.]".

On HN, your title should match what the article actually says ("Please use the original title, unless it is misleading or linkbait" -https://news.ycombinator.com/newsguidelines.html)

I think if we change the title to "When I don't discuss politics with friends", that would be more accurate given what you've written here.

Edit: I looked at the article and didn't see anything that particularly mitigated the title, so I've put it back to "Why" above.

by dang

4/3/2025 at 2:30:10 PM

We must distinguish between policy and principle.

In a society where there is agreement on basic principles, public debates will focus mainly on policy. Policy, while less abstract than principle, is in a certain sense less tractable in a manner analogous to how mathematical proofs are more abstract yet more tractable than verifying empirical claims, like knowing whether there are an infinite number of primes versus whether there's a teapot orbiting the earth.

Good policy requires a more conspicuous application of prudential judgement, which entails the integration of information and opinion of varying trustworthiness to make a best effort decision, which is something a person must learn and develop.

But one thing that is characteristic about our political predicament is not disagreement over policy per se, but the reasons for our disagreement. Two people sharing the same principles can still disagree about policy, and because they share the same principles, a debate over policy is manageable, because the basic parameters circumscribe the debated subject matter. However, if you look closely to the policy disagreements we're seeing, it is clear people are talking past one another. Something deeper, unspoken, is at issue. That is because the agreement on matters of principle is shrinking. This is why some view today's disagreement in terms of religious warfare, because in a sense it is.

As I've written many times in comments on HN, "religion" is effectively just a synonym for "worldview". Many people have ad hoc and incoherent or strangely specific or even parochial intuitions of what religion is, but understood as a bona fide or coherent category, it is essentially just another word for worldview. Everyone has one, however implicit, so it isn't a question of whether you "have a religion", but which. You may not realize that you are subject to a worldview, just as the proverbial fish that has never left the ocean doesn't know what water is, but it's there influencing your decisions and the course of your life.

In the US and much of the West, this has generally meant liberalism. And we're all liberals. The right and the left? Both liberal. The conflict between them is less Hindu vs. Muslim and more Pharisee vs. Sadducee. But as time progresses, as the internal tensions of liberalism unfold within the human psyche and within society across time, as liberalism crashes in slow motion because of this dynamic, as the proverbial idols enter their twilight, the conflict can only deepen. And it won't be a left-right split per se.

Some miscellaneous remarks...

1. The author makes similar observations w.r.t. religion. For example, he notes that "[d]espite organized religion dropping in attendance, religious patterns of behavior are still everywhere, just adapted to a secular world." Absolutely. And this includes Silicon Valley ideology, which is just a variation of Americanism. You see plenty of "religious patterns of behavior" in SV (though I sense we are past the heyday of peak salvific SV eschatology; maybe it just has a different character now, unvarnished and naked).

2. The author's view of religion is nonetheless tendentious and rooted in stereotype and trope. For example, the history of martyrdom in the Catholic Church alone demonstrates that "going along to get along" or mob mentality are opposed to the Christian view of truth above all else. God Himself is taken to be the Truth, and Christ the incarnation of the Logos. The authentic Christian ethic, despite the dishwater often passing as Christianity, is morally austere in this regard, hence preferring to die for the truth (literally, as in "red martyrdom", or by suffering injustice, so-called "white martyrdom") than to betray it. Lying is categorically impermissible. Life is to be found only in the truth; only spiritual death is to be found in lies. Better for the body to die than the soul to die.

The notion that religion is about group cohesion even at the expense of the truth is certainly not a feature of Catholicism, but a common human tendency that it attacks, even if individual Catholics or groups of Catholics behave otherwise (again, a common human tendency). There is no authentic unity or authentic love outside of the truth. You cannot love what you do not know, and a society united in a lie is deficient in unity to the degree that the "unity" is rooted in the lie.

by lo_zamoyski

4/3/2025 at 4:54:03 AM

I would have agreed with this article before Trump took office a 2nd time. I liked to think of myself as not belonging to a tribe, a moderate who didn't buy the propaganda from either side. But now I've seen what the Trump 2.0 looks like, and I've become convinced we're headed toward autocracy with a mix of techno-feudalism and Christian nationalism.

I don't think you can maintain moderate views on that sort of situation without becoming complicit. Yes, Elon is up to no good. Trump is not the sort of person that should have this kind of power. Putin turned Russia into an autocracy. It's happened in other countries as well. There is a playbook for this, and the Trump administration is following their version of it. We don't have to go back to WW2 to make comparisons. Putin is not a good person, and Trump admires him.

The problem with the reasonable independent thinker is that they are relatively powerless against autocratic takeover. You need to join a side that is resisting. Assuming you value democracy and it's institutions.

by goatlover

4/3/2025 at 1:26:13 PM

[dead]

by tonnydourado

4/3/2025 at 7:56:52 AM

[dead]

by meo21

4/3/2025 at 1:50:36 PM

TL;DR: He doesn't discuss politics with his friends because he thinks he's more rational than them.

by moolcool

4/3/2025 at 2:44:08 PM

instead of writing this exact thing i found the first comment from the bottom which said it for me. these people are coping. articles like this read to me as a person good at writing long form whos trying to convince themselves their cowardice and inflated self image-driven decision not to curate their social circles is actually ok and not horribly damaging to our society.

by ixtli

4/3/2025 at 10:23:05 AM

[flagged]

by facile3232

4/2/2025 at 6:33:15 PM

[flagged]

by acidmath

4/2/2025 at 6:42:28 PM

Thanks for reading!

Yeah PG sorta talks about this in his piece I reference, that for some reason he notices conservatives tend to do this less than their liberal counterparts

I thought this was a fair data point and sad it seems to be downvoted almost? I'm not super familiar with HN's voting system

by shw1n

4/2/2025 at 9:39:53 PM

That you believe "conservatives ostracize less than liberals" tells us 100x more information than any number of articles could have.

Ask any gay kid how true that is.

by mrguyorama

4/2/2025 at 9:53:29 PM

lol I literally said PG noticed this, not me

but this is a great example of what my essay was highlighting

by shw1n

4/2/2025 at 6:48:42 PM

[dead]

by acidmath

4/3/2025 at 5:16:58 AM

[flagged]

by WalterBright

4/3/2025 at 1:47:13 PM

Frankly it sounds like someone who voted for Trump and wants to avoid having people criticize him for it, dressing up his "stop picking on me" schtick with pseudo-intellectual rationalizations.

You can't ignore politics when it's actively destroying your country - it's just not possible, and trying to ignore it is not the moral or ethical choice.

by pjdesno

4/3/2025 at 1:52:09 PM

If you voted for trump I cannot take any pseudo intellectualization of that choice at face value. Unless you are an anarchist and truly hope the federal government implodes and you don’t mind the cost of that. I am a mostly left European and I’d rather have Cheney as president. And I do think Cheney is probably the worst kind of human being but he is probably not totally disjoint from reality.

by nasmorn

4/3/2025 at 8:44:01 AM

Wild how this person starts off with 'I don't like collective thought and action' and lands in 'so I joined a gambling addicted cult using discrete math from high school and advocates for it with pop culture tropes'.

The audacity to discard millennia of history and philosophy with 'no one's got time for that' and substituting it with a crude gambling scheme is just astounding. QAnon for the well-off, a cognitive technique to get out of having to deal with systemic injustice because 'sometimes rentiers also feel bad so there is actually suffering on both sides'.

In a way it's similar to some forms of antisemitism, antisemitism as "der Sozialismus der dummen Kerle", noticing some superficial conditions but instead of following through to develop a worldview copping out and getting an obsession with a simple, consistently applied reasoning. The jews did you nasty because you're not one of them. You did a bad bet because you were controlled by your tribe, unlike me, the enlightened high schooler who isn't loyal to anyone but myself.

Like antisemitism it's the position of a loser refusing to join forces with other people to try and cause systemic change based on their common material interests. Yes, I see that the banks are exploiting us, but no, I won't join your 'tribe', instead I'm going to make tables detailing the ancestry of the bankers. Yes, I see that were going down the drain but instead of joining your movement to put pressure on people in power I'm going to spend the evening making a flowchart and cherry pick some statistics and then give money to a cult that agrees with this approach.

If you meet someone like this, you should absolutely engage with them on contemporary, political issues. As soon as you get them to agree that something is bad, tell them to come to a meeting, be it a union, dinner, protest, whatever. Insist, don't take a no for an answer. Make it a challenge, whatever it takes. If it doesn't work the first time, try again next time you meet. These people need help and empathy, and to be among people at least sometimes when they're away from their screens.

by cess11

4/3/2025 at 12:59:35 PM

HN is definitely a tribe of Biden and Harris. Any more conservative opinions expressed here are immediately met with downvotes.

by MaxGripe

4/3/2025 at 7:04:09 PM

i truly desperately beg of you to recognize that this is an extremely reductive and idiotic viewpoint that does not reflect reality

by GuinansEyebrows

4/2/2025 at 6:45:11 PM

> The insidious nature of this question comes from the false representation as earnest, intellectual discourse. Many who ask it may truly believe they’re engaging earnestly, but their responses quickly reveal an angle more akin to religious police. ... Most vulnerable to this behavior are the intellectually honest + socially clueless, who engage in good faith, unaware of the pending social ambush.

My favorite thing about this enlightened centrist/individual thinker line to kick off with is it's almost universally used by people who have one or more abhorrent viewpoints in their back pocket, and the "social ambush" described here would be much better phrased as, well, disclosing what that is and just saving us all some time. I personally am deeply curious what beliefs Ashwin has been ambushed about.

If you have thoughts on how tax brackets should be constructed, or whether we should move to flat taxation, whether highway budgets should include beatification or whether that should be up to municipalities, what zoning restrictions are used for a given area, all that type of what should be politics, neither myself nor anyone I know would "ambush" you for those beliefs. Discussing and rounding out those kinds of issues is the foundation of how a Democracy works. We have to discuss them, and you should have opinions on at least a few of them, and you should share them! That's how it works. And for what it's worth, I can't fathom a situation I would ambush anyone over those sorts of issues. I might disagree, and I might ask for elaboration or perhaps suggest alternatives to what you want to do, but I wouldn't shame you for them.

If on the other hand you think horrible things that for some insane reason have gotten traction lately, like that putting tariffs on foreign goods is somehow going to bring back American manufacturing (it isn't), that some of your fellow citizens who might be gay, trans, both, or something else shouldn't enjoy a full set of rights under the law for whatever cockamamie reason you'd like to cite (they should), that children should be re-introduced to the labor market to bolster the amount of cheap labor available (they shouldn't), that the government should be doing genital inspections on children who want to play sports to make sure no one's "cheating" (stupid, horrifying, illegal in several ways) and I could go on, then yeah, you probably will find yourself socially ambushed. And you should be. That's how shaming works. That's what we have done to one another for thousands of years when we behave anti-socially: if you act anti-social, you are not going to have an easy time being social. That's, again, just how that works.

I of course don't wish that fate on anyone, I have been spurned from communities and it sucks! But I did survive that process and a number of those experiences, awful as they were at the time, shaped me into a better person overall with a more internally consistent and defensible belief system than the one I was indoctrinated into as a child.

And yeah, a lot of this is also just "political tribalism sucks!" Cosigned, 100%.

by ToucanLoucan

4/3/2025 at 12:37:24 AM

The assumption that social ambushes only occur for horrific beliefs is an amazingly naive take on humanity. By this logic it's implied that the women burned in the Salem witch trials must've done something to deserve it.

I've been ambushed for explaining: - to right-leaning folk that most migrants are seeking a better life - to left-leaning folk that securing a border is not a crazy idea - to right-leaning folk that subsidies to help restore agency to people who've had a rougher start and benefit everyone - to left-leaning folk that merely allocating money to an government agency does not necessarily mean anything beneficial happens

Not even taking a stand, just pointing out opposing points -- hardly an anti-social, horrible act

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 1:32:13 PM

> The assumption that social ambushes only occur for horrific beliefs is an amazingly naive take on humanity. By this logic it's implied that the women burned in the Salem witch trials must've done something to deserve it.

That is an incredible leap in logic with far too many layers to properly litigate.

> I've been ambushed for explaining: - to right-leaning folk that most migrants are seeking a better life - to left-leaning folk that securing a border is not a crazy idea - to right-leaning folk that subsidies to help restore agency to people who've had a rougher start and benefit everyone - to left-leaning folk that merely allocating money to an government agency does not necessarily mean anything beneficial happens

I think you're wholely unaware of the concept of dog-whistles and their role in our modern politics.... I mean not even modern, those go back centuries.

In any case:

- You were probably ambushed for suggesting migrants are seeking a better life because many right leaning people are propagandized so heavily into thinking every migrant is a rapist felon drug selling child molester.

- You were probably ambushed for endorsing border security for the same reason, because it's become a dog-whistle for unhinged levels of racism and nationalism projected by the right. And while I don't endorse that level of over-correction on the part of whoever ambushed you, I also don't not-understand it. The dehumanizing rhetoric around immigrants is fucking disgusting and shameful, literally the stuff of Nazi's, and especially given the ongoing abuses by border patrol, the active deportations of people who've committed no crime due to administrative incompetence on their and other agency's parts, again, I'm not surprised people might be telling you to can it about needing more of that.

- Again, this is a ridiculous amount of propaganda going back to the 80's, where the Reagan campaigns created outright fiction about "welfare queens" (and again, more racism there as they were always implied to be black) that's led to decades of "welfare reform" which is better stated as "fucking over the poor for profit."

- And you likely got ambused about the last thing because.... it's wrong, and again, not only is it wrong, it's a hot button issue that's been, again, ruined by the Reagan administration who, along with their compatriots in the Thatcher administration and similar austerity administrations and politics worldwide, have systematically defunded uncountable numbers of public services, which leads to a degradation in those services, which leads to more justifications for more cuts, which leads to a death spiral which is why virtually no government agencies anywhere are effective anymore.

> Not even taking a stand, just pointing out opposing points -- hardly an anti-social, horrible act

And like, I get that you personally aren't advocating for these things, but what you are doing, unintentionally, is invoking bad faith rhetoric that is, at the risk of sounding dramatic, behind the political movement that is more or less responsible for the fact that nothing works anymore and every government on Earth is struggling. And for you, that's probably a minor, or perhaps major annoyance. For other people, it's life threatening. For certain groups of people, they may not only find the actions of border control and immigration courts abhorrent, they might well be the targets of those actions relatively soon.

To put it another way, you may not have strong feelings about zoning regulations or deciding where a sewage line goes in your town. However, if you say that to the person who's back yard is full of overflow sewage and it's causing their family to become ill and their home to be borderline unlivable, they're probably going to be quite pissed off with you because just because something isn't a critically important issue to you doesn't mean it isn't to someone else.

Context is important. I would encourage you the next time you feel so ambushed, instead of getting defensive and/or running away, ask questions. Why is this issue so important to this person? Why are they so upset with what you're saying? Is there another angle to this that you're unaware of?

by ToucanLoucan

4/3/2025 at 3:13:01 PM

> I think you're wholely unaware of the concept of dog-whistles and their role in our modern politics...

I'd think the opposite actually. If you bring up border security, then the conversation can go in one of two ways: a discussion of the actual policies of border security, or a conversation that hears the dog whistle and proceeds under the context that you fall into the tribe that uses that dog whistle. The latter is an ambush. The policies themselves still exist even outside of their historical context as dog whistles. The question is if can you have a conversation with someone that talks about the policies themselves or not

by ranger207

4/3/2025 at 5:25:54 AM

You're doing yourself a disservice by creating a false dichotomy of "things that are okay to discuss" (tax brackets, zoning) and "things that aren't" (tariffs, manditory genital inspections), when it's very unlikely that anyone will have the exact same bifurcation point as you.

And, I have to say, I thought it was pretty amusing that you appear to treat someone discussing tariffs with the same severity as someone discussing mandatory genital inspections.

by oasisaimlessly

4/2/2025 at 6:56:42 PM

I am incredibly jealous of how eloquently you've put it...

by curiousgal

4/3/2025 at 11:46:52 AM

Must be nice.

Only the favored majority have the privilege of deciding not to talk about politics.

by jachee

4/3/2025 at 4:00:01 PM

The next time I need to describe my disdain for "rationalists", I'll just be able to link this blog post for being entirely vacuous while patting itself on the back

by laidoffamazon

4/3/2025 at 4:38:23 AM

in my experience people who are on the political left are very rude and dismissive of any heterodox position as some moral sin

by fareesh

4/3/2025 at 6:17:31 AM

If you can afford to not discuss politics with friends these days, you are in an incredibly privileged position.

I don't enjoy discussing Vim vs Emacs, or Windows vs Linux, or Star Trek vs Star Wars, or the weather. Some people get way too enthusiastic about it, to the point of religious fanaticism, but in the end it doesn't really matter either way. I don't really care about the tribes, and in most cases nothing productive is going to come out of the discussion. If my friends are on the other "team", I can happily agree to disagree.

I also wouldn't enjoy discussing whether the room should be filled with air or neurotoxin - but I can't afford not to. I'm sure the pro-neurotoxin people would be very nice to hang out with if we set our differences aside. Except for, you know, the whole "filling the room with neurotoxin" thing. If their side wins, it's going to seriously ruin my day. I don't really care about the how or the why or their tribes, the thing that matters is that they are trying to fill the room with neurotoxin. If I were to hang out with friends, it is quite important to know whether I could trust them with the air handling equipment.

If you can afford not discussing politics, you're essentially saying that politics don't impact you. They are nothing more than a mild inconvenience, and friendships are too valuable to set aside over something as trivial as that. To you politics are nothing more than the weather: you might need to cancel your weekend hike because of heavy rain, but oh well.

A lot of people don't have that luxury. For a lot of people, politics are literally a matter of life and death. Ignoring it isn't an option.

by crote

4/3/2025 at 11:15:05 AM

"An extremist is someone who won't change their mind and won't change the subject"

Just ensure that emotions and Reddit aren't your source for political discussion - it's too easy to get pulled into an illogical extreme when you're listening to people PAID to polarize you.

by ghosttaboo

4/3/2025 at 8:58:40 AM

I can not be friends with someone that votes for ppl that try to literally erase me.

If these ppl come into power i have to leave my country and i would rather not have to do it.

by i5heu

4/3/2025 at 3:10:55 PM

This is such a wild perspective to me. I can't imagine considering somebody a friend while simultaneously not feeling comfortable discussing politics with them.

by pdpi

4/2/2025 at 7:02:06 PM

A lot of people are in a particular tribe because they literally cannot be in the other tribe because the other tribe sees them as subhuman, as people who should be deported, who should lose their rights, etc. A lot of them realize that they're in a tribe and don't particularly like it, but since the political system is set up in a way where you can't reasonably have more than two parties, they don't have a choice.

Basically, the author is making it seem like everyone other than a select few are tribal idiots, but that's a fundamental outcome of our political system. You can pick and choose your policies, but at the end of the day, you're voting for one of two parties.

by hardwaregeek

4/2/2025 at 7:09:58 PM

I actually totally get this and think it's totally fair to be in a tribe (I say this in the piece), this is less about how people vote and more about how they discuss issues

Only time I have issue is when a view is presented as truth-seeking instead of tribal

But agreed, our political system is setup this way

by shw1n

4/3/2025 at 9:28:24 AM

The problem with this view is it treats politics as having the same stakes for everyone.

When one side is arguing for the death of a group, or that women shouldn’t have rights and be kept as sex slaves, the stakes are much different.

You do not in fact have to be friends with fascists.

by rimbo789

4/3/2025 at 11:27:19 AM

I’ve got strict rules on not discussing politics generally and I would even pretend to not know about things or only barely and not having any position. I do jump deep into topic with strangers for fun or build up slowly. Never would I share political views with my workplace and partner, I give them the freedom to keep theirs believes without altering them with the “truth”, if people are simple let them be. I also let anybody have their position especially family members and would be much less eager to tell them more. It’s mostly a blessing not having went down the rabbit hole and I don’t want to tamper with it. I like to argue with the opposite extrem position for fun.

by sharpshadow